jordan perry's vibrator

some people in my asks are very confused about the fact my uterus exists

That's?? How life is??? You're trans or you're not???

awww the like button turns into a rainbow when you press it! that's so cute...hey staff what's with all the trans women you keep nuking?

i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users

I told a guy his total was 13.21 and he said “wish it were that year, could actually get some good music on the radio”

breaking news from the AP, our boys on the front have just sacked constantinople. take that, heretics. coming up next are the soothing lute dirges of bing crosby

See THIS is the shit I come to tumblr for

I told a guy his total was 13.21 and he said “wish it were that year, could actually get some good music on the radio”

breaking news from the AP, our boys on the front have just sacked constantinople. take that, heretics. coming up next are the soothing lute dirges of bing crosby

hey you. teenage girl writing in her diary. quit talking about the boy you have a crush on and start writing about the current political situation, the valuation of currencies, and the level of technology your people hold. your diary might be the only piece of evidence our society existed after nuclear war fries all of our data backups. future historians don't need to know about damian, they need at least a secondhand accounts of the great water wars and whether or not your leaders truly did worship a deity called "the free hand of the market"

Keep writing about your crush Teenaged Girl. About your clothes, and how that other girl wore the same dress as you. Paint me a picture of what you were like.

Historians are going to hear about Damian and they're gonna LIKE IT

Make those future Historians reverse engineer the socioeconomic hierarchies of the 21st century from dreamy descriptions of Damian's current fashions. It's giving them enrichment.

Anybody else have no idea how their personality is perceived by others? Like am I nice? Am I mean? I have no idea.

When people tell me stuff about me I literally think about it nonstop for 3-5 business days.

A coworker casually said “everyone else likes you” (because one coworker was mad at me) and I was for real like ????everyone likes me??????

I feel like this also implies that rome is somehow being destroyed by the end of the day

The Emperor Constantine loves Finius and Ferbingetorix's "New Rome" so much that he makes it his new capital and names it after himself.

phineas and ferb heritage post

Sometimes I forget I'm satan-offical and I'll look through my blog and be like "damn satan-offical is super famous" and my mind is like "you ARE satan-offical" and I'm like "nahhh"