Life Within a Dark Deck
Chapter 1: Tipped Scale
Izuku knew that today was not going to be a good day, even with the beating he had received the night before. He woke up with tears streaking down his face from the nightmares that had been plaguing his mind for the last year, and the pain of his wounds being stretched open threatening to bleed once again and those were the least of his worries.
His mind had become heavier with dark thoughts when he would normally push them aside but now a few of them became tempting to the point of idealization. They were a feather away from tipping the scale into reality, and some already went past that. Shaking the morbid thoughts away, he slowly got out of his bed and headed toward the showers.
He sighed in massive relief as his mother was not home that morning, and took his sweet time in cleaning his wounds and other grime off of him. The verdanette hissed in pain as the hot water poured over his back, flaring the healing and barely healing wounds that he had received from Inko the night prior.
He choked a sob as he remembered the reason why he was beaten, and it wasnât his fault. He went to the clients after school as requested, but he was turned away by them saying he was no longer needed. Inko didnât take that too well and tied him to the table and whipped him with her punishment of choice, the Cat oâ Nine Tails, slicing the skin off his back and ass, then forcing him to clean the blood up afterward.
âI donât know how long I can take this...j-just one more school year and I can leave. I donât care where, just anywhere but here, away from her and away from him.â Izuku grumbled, forcing more dark thoughts out of his mind and focusing on wrapping his waist. âI better be more careful, I have a strong feeling that the school will use me as target practice again.â
With that Izuku got fully ready, trying not to limp so much as he locked the door and walked quickly to the Bakugouâs house so they can head to Aldera Middle School together, hoping that his supposed childhood friend would not notice and make a scene or verbally assault him on how useless he is even without the blondeâs help. He is observant of the smallest details, so the next thing would lie and put up a facade.
Katsuki Bakugou woke up more paranoid than usual and something in the back of his mind was nagging him much more than the old hag he calls his Mom. It was telling the blonde that hell and twilight zone were making a hellspawn and no one would like it one bit.
âThis better not involve Deku, I swear this feeling always flares whenever heâs involved.â He growled before looking outside to see the mentioned verdanette outside, leaning against one of the pillars. Is he shaking? Why is he favoring that leg? He thought before shaking his head, grabbing a few slices of bread, and walking out the door. Something tells me the shitty school will make things worse, better make a scene again.
âYou look like shit, Deku.â
âS-sorry, Kacchan, I was studying at the table and I kind of fell asleep that way.â Izuku said, looking away as he could feel Katsuki glare at him.
Katsuki raised one of his eyebrows, thinking that does not fully explain the limping but then again it sort of does if it pinches a nerve. âTch, whatever. Just keep up with me, and donât stop for anything, not even Heroes, I am in no mood to babysit a crybaby Nerd.â
A sharp pain went through his chest as Katsuki said that and his steps faltered a bit, causing the blonde to yell at him. âI SAID KEEP UP!!â
âS-SORRY!!â
So far the morning was just the usual banter and/or yelling between the two, nothing unusual for the 14-year-old duo. Nothing to trigger the paranoia in both of them, so what is? Izuku was right about Aldera though, the PE teacher called him in an hour before PE and...provided the verdanette with a sore throat before forcing him to go into the locker rooms and suit up for target practice.
The students used him as a Quirk dummy, some wrapping vines around the limbs and throat, providing hateful images of him committing suicide and telling him in his mind that he was pathetic and die, basically suicide baiting him to end his life, claws, and fangs striking and biting him through the fading pads, finishing it up with Katsuki once again using his Explosion to blast Izuku several feet and knocking him out for the rest of the class.
The real kicker was the final hour and their Homeroom teacher had to ask this one particular question for the scale to start tipping dangerously toward the abyss. âMr. Midoriya, you also stated in your papers that you want to attend UA as well, correct?â
Dread filled the verdanette as he felt everyoneâs eyes on him and he tried to shrink himself as he knew what was about to happen. Not long after everyone laughed at the verdanette and started to taunt him, already filling his fragile mind with even more hate.
âHe wants to go to UA? Fat chance! They will never accept a Quirkless like you.â
*snort* âIf they do, they will be in General Education or maybe a ball boy, no way they will put you in the Hero Course.â
âThis guy will try though, I hear he still wants to be a Hero!â
âIf he wants to be a Hero, I am sure he will have to do some extra stuff to get on their good side.â
Izuku whimpered at the negativity and was tearing up around the edges, making everyone laugh even harder at his overly-sensitive emotions. His mind had also sent images of him servicing when the last student mentioned a word that triggered his trauma, and he was on the verge of a panic attack.
âHe wonât even make it the first week, look how pathetic he is. Crying will get him nowhere! The Quirkless loser is nothing but a mommy's boy!â
âYou wouldnât even think of that if you knew the truth.â He mumbled, and Katsuki picked up on it, and the strain of his voice when he was upset at something. What would make him say that when Inko is the sweetest woman? Did something happen or is this a phase? Either way, he was pissed that this Quirkless Deku was raining on his parade of him being the first to go to UA, and that needed to be addressed after school.
Izuku flinched and covered his face as books, wadded papers, and erasers were thrown in his direction, trying to avoid even more injury before the next dreaded session. He even avoided looking at his childhood friend, knowing that he would be under his wrath after school. That knife in the kitchen was becoming more tempting again in his thoughts hoping that later tonight he was one slice away to be free.
He was nothing more than a slug in a society that thinks the Quirkless is nothing.
âAlright, enough making a mess, everyone. Midoriya, you will be cleaning that up after school.â Iruka-sensei said and glared at the entire class. They went quiet and Izuku sighed in defeat for the thousandth time.
âH-haiâŚâ
The rest of the school day went without a hitch and to the verdanetteâs dismay the school bell rang and everyone started to pack or leave. Some even left parting shots at Izuku before snickering behind their hands, once again saying that he will never become a Hero and just give up.
Iruka-sensei once again had to tell the students to leave before leaving Izuku alone in the cleaning process for a few minutes. It was then Katsuki decided to confront him.
âOi, Deku!â
Katsuki walked up to the verdanette after class ended and he was followed by two of his goons, Tsubasa and Riko. The two behind him were smirking while the blonde in question was snarling at him, approaching Izuku like an angry pit bull.
âDamn Nerd, trying to steal my spotlight.â Katsuki growled, releasing sparks from his palms. âI'm trying to become a Hero. The very first Hero from this godforsaken school, and you just had to fucking ruin it!â He then shoved Izuku across his desk, causing him to flinch in pain when he landed on the floor and debris.
âI-I didnât mean to, I still want to be a Hero too Kacchan...I was hop-â
âHAH! A Quirkless canât be a Hero and there is no way in hell UA would put you in the Hero Course. Best you can do is probably General Support classes.â Katsuki taunted, picking up one of Izukuâs books filled with Hero analysis. He looked at a few pages before snorting and blasting it with his Quirk. âWith all this analysis shit, the support course would be better for a useless Deku.â
The verdanette flinched as he was once again being called useless, and his stomach began to tighten in despair. âWait, Kacchan, that has some Hero Signatures...also I just want to tryâŚâ Izuku looked down and mumbled the last part. His chest and throat were starting to tighten at the blondeâs hurtful words. He knew he was telling the truth, but it was stretching his hope very thin, which has already been frayed for quite a while. âI justâŚprove them wrongâŚthat Iâm more than just a pawnâŚâ
Katsuki looked at the verdanette in slight confusion. He was usually not this timid, he seemed...desperate? Deciding that he might have been in pain from being the punching bag and tossed the book out the window. âStop dreaming, Nerd. You are nothing but a Deku.â
He then walked away towards the exit while Izuku continued picking up the papers and other items he was forced to clean up. âIf you want a Quirk so bad to get even a hellâs chance to be in the Hero course, why donât you jump off a building and wish for one in the next life.â
Izuku dropped the items and looked at him with wide eyes at Katsukiâs words, feeling like a dull blade had just impaled him, followed by the visual of jumping off of Aldera. The fact he just said that made him realize that even his âfriendâ didnât believe him, just like everyone else in this Godforsaken world. Rage suddenly filled the green bean and he was trying to keep the boiling from reaching the surface, but when Katsuki laughed tauntingly, he snapped.
âYou think I havenât already done that!!??â He yelled and lunged at Katsuki, knocking him back to the window. The blonde stared back at him like a deer in headlights. âFor the past year I have been trying to escape my prison. From slicing,â
He punched the window hard.
âOverdosingâŚâ
Cracks started to form on the pane.
âEven fucking poisoning!!â
A crunch was heard as the glass shattered and Izuku recoiled as his arm went limp and blood was dripping from the glass shards. He ignored the pain as he continued to glare at his now disloyal friend. âEvery single fucking time I tried I miraculously survive but left in such poor condition, too weak to even move or resist my tormentors. No matter what the fuck I do, Death refuses to save a Quirkless, useless Deku!â
Stunned silence surrounded the room as they looked at the verdanette like he just grew a second head, only the sound of heavy breathing from that same verdanette now adding pain to his rage. It looked like he was about to verbally murder them again before his features stilled and hid behind the mask once more.
âWhy even bother?â He said dully, now turning around to get his bag. Tears were still streaking down his face. âTen years of dealing with fear and pain it is obvious nothing will change my fate.â
He then walked out with his arm starting to look bruised and swollen. Then one of the guys with wings, Tsubasa walked over and tried to put a hand on Izukuâs shoulder. âH-hey, Midoriya? You need to go to the hospital, your arm is bleeding, let me-â
âForget itâŚâ He snapped, jerking his shoulder away from the hand. âThey donât care, theyâll just make another excuse that it is nothing and I am just an attention seeking whore. Wouldnât be the first time they did that.â
âHuh?â The trio asked dumbly, and Izuku just huffed.
âJust leave me alone. I donât want to be bothered anymore.â
With that he left, leaving the trio stunned and highly confused. Once Izuku got to the tunnel, tears started falling as his emotions came back in full and he realized he revealed information he didnât want anyone to find out and that sent his mind into further despair. He needs to disappear, but how?
âKacchanâs suggestion does give me an idea I havenât thought of though.â Izuku said, stopping as his arm was starting to throb painfully. âIt might increase my chances, after all I canât swim.â He gently rubbed his lower arm to try to reduce the throbbing sensation, keeping him immobile temporarily. He is definitely in hot water, after this injury he wouldnât be able to do todayâs session with a client, and that means no payment, which will eventually lead to his mom raging and using her cat-o-nine tails, or worse.
He slowly walked home resigning to his fate of another beatdown for abandoning another grooming session and his mind shut down once again, no longer caring about what punishment awaited. At this point, the pain was the only thing that kept him alive, and after so long he can no longer feel the pain over his skin. Now...whatâs the point?
He wants to feel alive again before his final actâŚMaybe feeling his lungs constricting in pain as he suffocates underwater would be the Coup de Gras. He just needs to find the right location to prevent anyone from trying to save him.
Meanwhile back at Aldera, Katsuki, Tsubasa, and Riko were trying to figure out what the hell happened and what caused the personality switch on Izuku, and piece together what he had said before leaving.
One thing that was all on their minds was âhe has attempted suicide before?â They did not see any evidence of it but it may have been from the school uniforms being all black. Though Katsuki did notice he had fingerless compression gloves on his hands, and, he thought it was to reduce the inflammation from writing practically 24/7. Now he is second-guessing his assumptions, and it left a heavy pit in his stomach, something he had never felt before. Something didnât add up and it somehow made him queasy.
Another was the fact he has been in hospitals before and mentioned that those âdoctorsâ were accusing him of malingering made Katsuki believe this is a form of malpractice. Apparently, they have done this long enough for Izuku to refuse to seek help even for a broken arm. That sent another red flag, and it put a word in his mind that the hospitals should never be labeled with.
Quirk Discrimination.
Personally, Katsuki had seen enough Quirkism in his life being with the Nerd and in hindsight, he too saw the abuse society and the school has given him. He hated the fact that there were shitheads like them who think those with no powers or undesirable Quirks were worth nothing to society.
He had tried his best to keep the Nerd safe but eventually, even he became an abuser, and his mind was telling him it was for the best for Izuku to face reality and do his best to get him to abandon his dream of becoming a fucking hero. Now, after that outburst, was it really the best thing the blonde could do? Was there another way to keep him safe without being a complete douche?
More than once he had saved Izuku from serious injury or death from strangers, but he failed to realize one thing: saving the verdanette from that same blonde.
He will have to think of a way to apologize to Izuku, but for now, there was something else that was bothering him. When one of the students called him a Mommaâs Boy, he saw it had hit a serious nerve. Why the hell did he not want to be called a Momma's Boy? What did Auntie Inko do that would cause him to be afraid? Does it have to do with the limping that morning? Then he mentioned ten years of fear and pain, what the fuck did he mean by that??
Just then Iruka-sensei came in with a notebook and was surprised to see Katsuki and the others cleaning instead of Izuku. âMr. Bakugou, I thought you had left for the day. Where is Midoriya and...what happened to the window?â He then pinched the bridge of his nose. âIf you used your Quirk to bully Izuku again, you know I will have to report it to your parents.â
âI didnât blow up shit,â Katsuki growled, and he leaned against a wall. âWell, for starters the window was caused by the Nerd when I said something that made him go berserk. We had an argument about going to UA, and that he should not go but some things were fucking said and...that was when Deku went nuts.â
Iruka-sensei was surprised by Izukuâs unusual outburst and started to think before looking at the blonde. âMr. Bakugou, has there been any tension between him and his mother lately? Or something out of the ordinary besides P.E.?â
Katsuki raised an eyebrow. So he noticed. âHe was limping this morning and he wasnât the day before. But he also seems more sensitive to negativity which I know for a fact he used to brush off and continue to walk with the same fucking smile.â He then looked down when he contemplated more information. âHe also mentioned during his outburst of hospitals ignoring his injuries, andâŚhe has mentioned trying to off himself for the past year. Three times in fact.â
âWhat?â Their teacher said and walked towards the blonde with a worried expression. âAre you sure? Has he given any reason why he was doing that?â
Now that sent red flags in his brain and his stomach felt like he got hit by All Mightâs Detroit Smash. âSenseiâŚwhat the fuck is going on?â He released some pops in his hands to keep him stable. âWhat arenât you telling me?â
Iruka-sensei contemplated before sighing in defeat. âSince you both have been raised together and you show concern, we are under review of potential child endangerment and possible exploitationâŚâ He then pulled out his phone as he heard Katsuki choke in shock and hesitated for a moment before pointing to the screen video surveillance. He scrunched his face when he saw the look of disbelief and disgust appear on his studentâs face.
âWhat...the actualâŚfucking hell!?â
Izuku was walking into the locker room rubbing his throat and spitting something out for a few minutes before removing his school uniform for P.E. Katsuki took in every detail as he could in that small phone, and the first thing he noticed was that Izuku was crying. It was not the normal crying he had seen this crybaby do, it was more...emotional...painful. Izuku was gritting his teeth as he tried to pull his shirt off and it was sticking to him like sweat but Katsuki could see it was catching too much for it to be and the shirt had patches of pink like it was stained with blood.
Katsuki flinched as he saw the verdanette jerk as the shirt finally came off, now revealing bandages wrapped all over his back covered with the same pink stains. It was poorly wrapped as you could see Izukuâs back being in all shades of pink, red, purple, and within the light, shiny like fresh plasma. Katsukiâs stomach lurched again, and he suddenly remembered the feeling he had that morning. It was telling him to protect the Nerd.
âWhatâŚHowâŚWHO!!??â
Unbridled rage then filled Katsuki like a volcano and he wanted to tear the living shit out of whoever did this to Izuku, and he suddenly ran to the exit. âFingers, Wings, find him, NOW!!â
âRIGHT!â The duo said and they all took off to look for Izuku now fearing for his life and sanity while Iruka-sensei ended the video to make a phone call.
âOphiuchi, we need to find him, he has attempted already.â
âThank you, Iruka. I will be there shortly.â
â
You call this pain?
It just had to be Izukuâs luck that he was the target of a Villain trying to hide from a Hero. This Human-Sludge promised pain for a minute while the possession is in progress, but this pain was nothing to the verdanette.
He could feel the slime going down his throat and pool in his stomach, trying to suffocate him with the thick sludge. It was useless, after all, that this 14-year-old has been through, there was no pain greater than what he has suffered, at least the sludge tasted a hell of a lot better than what he was forced to swallow.
The only thing he could feel was his body becoming weaker, and his vision becoming darker as the oxygen was being deprived of his body. His mind welcomed the darkness as consciousness left him, saying goodbye to the bad memories that had plagued him for ten years. He looked at the Villain one last time, thanking him for this Mercy as his soul prepares to leave this Godforsaken world.
The Villain, trying to avoid the man who he thought was still in the United States normally would not care about who he would possess but he had noticed a few things with his soon-to-be host. The boy lost the will to live and he could see it clearly in his eyes, and also suffered an injury. He canât deny that he was curious but he was more focused on saving his ass before-
A loud sound was heard from behind both of them and the Villain couldnât believe his cursed luck. The man just came out of the sewers, wearing tan cargo pants and a white t-shirt several sizes too small for his build.
âDonât worry, Young Man, for I am here.â
âTexasâŚ..SMASH!!â
The large man punched forward and sent a gust of wind toward the Human-Sludge-Thing, causing the Villain to scream as he was unable to hold himself together and scattered all over the floor and walls, revealing the verdanette, who Death had refused his passage once again.
Izuku woke up with a hand lightly tapping his cheek and not long after the leftover contents of that Human-Sludge left his stomach.
âThatâs it, Young Man, get it all out. Heaven knows what would happen if I hadnât made it in timeâŚâ
*gurk* Izuku gagged what was left over and opened his tear-streaked eyes to see where he was at. Disorientation was still in effect but once Izuku regained focus he saw that he was on top of a building several miles away from the tunnels, and something large was rubbing his back.
âG-get away from me!â
Panic set in once again as he could feel his scars from every rub. Izuku instinctively tried to kick the hand away and tried to scramble or run away, but stumbled only a few feet.Â
The man was showing great concern as the boy was reacting negatively. âMy boy, you are safe. That Sludge Villain wonât harm you anymore.â
Izuku looked around again before looking back at the beefy man like a trapped animal before his mind started to recognize the yellow bunny bangs and signature smile of the No. 1 Hero. âA-all Might?â
The now-identified Hero sighed in relief. âThank goodness, you know who I am. Yes, it is I All Might the Symbol of Peace. I just saved you from the Sludge Villain, though unfortunately, he got away. I will get him eventually, you were my main priority for rescue.â
Izuku just stared at the man that was his Idol for years and thanked his blessing that he was able to see the man in person and was rescued by him to boot. âA-a-ah, thank you for saving me. You didnât have toâŚâ
âYoung Man, I am a Hero. Of course, I had to, you were dying.â
Does he really care? Can he give me the answer I need? Izuku thought and looked back at the Symbol of Peace. He had questions but his mouth was so dry and his thoughts were racing that he couldnât even form the first syllable. Eventually, Izuku flinched when All Might pointed to his arm.
âYou should get to the hospital and get that fixed, Young Man. That arm looks really nastyâŚâ
Izuku snapped out of his thoughts. âW-wait, I want to ask you something, if I may.â He started and saw the Hero stand at attention. âIs it possible for a Quirkless to become a Hero? O-or at least be able to live a normal life in this society? Can someone without a quirk be like you?â
All Mightâs demeanor suddenly changed when Izuku asked that question and the verdanette could sense the disgust radiating from his body. He stared at him with loathing all too familiar with those who hated people like him.
âYou should be lucky that I saved your life, kid.â He said darkly, staring at the shaking form and relishing the effect he was giving him. âYou will never be a Hero because of your status, and frankly death is much better suited for those who are doomed to die.â
Izukuâs mind shattered as the hope he was barely clinging to snuffed out. The person he looked up to, the person who saved civilians, just showed his true colors. He was nothing but a Quirkist Bastard, and those words just opened up Pandoraâs Box.
*SMACK* I am not supporting my Quirkless son anymore! A failure like you, going to UA? HAH! You will be working under him as an Escort and you will bring me money. If you die by their cocks then fine by me!
Your life is so pathetic Deku. If you want to have a Quirk so badly, why donât you jump off the tallest building and wish for a Quirk in the next life?
Izuku bent over as his lungs constricted as he was gasping for air, his mind racing with all the memories of the bullying and the abuse as despair filled him like liquid nitrogen. He was nothing, no one, and the No. 1 Hero even thought he wasnât worth saving. If he knew he was Quirkless, he would have let that Villain kill him, or worse, HE would have killed both of them without any qualms.
I am nothing but a loser. A stupid, Quirkless, loser who is a burden to everybody in this Godforsaken society. I am nothing.
All Might laughed at the pitiful display the verdanette was showing and he enjoyed shattering the dreams of the weak. âNow that we are finished here, I better take my leave. Heaven knows I might deal with something even more worthwhile.âÂ
The Hero laughed again and left Izuku on top of the building, still hyperventilating as his hopes and dreams shattered all around him. All Mightâs morbid laughter rang through his mind, that taunting laughter that should not be fitting for a Hero. Izuku scratched his bad arm with his good hand as another wave of anger coursed through his stomach, reaching a boiling point as he realized another horrible fact.
The Symbol of Peace was no fucking Hero.
Izuku could not hold the rage any longer and screamed his heart out at the injustice. All Might was Quirkist, and because of his status, the verdanette will just be mocked. He screamed again and if you looked closer, there was a red tint in his green eyes.
âFUCK YOU ALL MIGHT!!â
All Might smirked at the despairing scream as he left Izuku to wallow in misery. Damn, that felt good, showing those who are weak they are nothing but a pedestal in a world that sees power as high status. They were better off dead, or if they are unlucky, an Escort.
The No. 1 Hero smirked again as he knew that the boy was extremely unlucky. He had to thank his Stars and Stripes as this boy forgot their previous encounter a few days prior. There is no fate more demeaning than what he had done to him, and later tonight he will relish it once he gets off work.
Back at the building, Izuku lost all will to do anything, his mind reliving the conversations of Ass Might and Katsuki, both telling him to just end his life as there is no future for him, only pain and torture. Thoughts of slicing his throat with a serrated blade were welcomed with open arms, along with a gun aimed at his heart, being skewered by a harpoon, like a fucking whale being illegally harvested, hell, even jumping off this fucking building was a warm welcome to his despair.
With his mind detached from the real world, the verdanette slowly got up and walked towards the edge of the building ramp, dull eyes looking down like staring into the abyss. The breeze on the roof felt relieving to his injuries, yet they still felt distant like it wasnât enough.Â
He needed to get closer.
Izuku grabbed the railing and proceeded to bend forward, his shattered soul telling him to go ahead and jump, and end all the pain. The people who tortured you won, and they have finally broken your soul, so what is the point of living? You have no one you can turn to, no one will believe you nor will they care for your life if you disappear. You are nothing.
Izuku!
W-what was that? Izuku thought as he heard someone scream his name, but he couldnât tell who it was or where it came from. His mind suddenly came to focus and he immediately stared at the concrete below, and he was leaning forward so sharply like one more inch, he would have fallen below.Â
âJesus Christ!â He screamed and used his good arm to push him back from the possible and gruesome death. The moment Izuku saw that height, alarm bells rang and told him to stay away, even if his other half was telling him to jump.
His fear had overwritten his despair, and the verdanette cursed at his weakness. Why couldnât he end his life? He should have been able to do it, yet his mind told him not to and it was so stupid. And who the hell was the person who called out his name???
Who would want to call me, no one fucking cares! My mom is proof I have no one. It almost sounded like a panicked male, like maybe Kacchan? No, he had never heard him scream since he was only 4, and that was for another reason. So who could it be?
Izuku scoffed and gave up, now having no other choice but either run away or go home and face his bitch of a mom. He decided to just end it his way and headed to Mustafu to catch a train to the forest, and from there he will let the animals maul him. What a way to go, to see them maim you and tear your limbs and organs out while you are possibly still alive. That will be the fate he has chosen.















