Moon 138- Part Two (Written Segment)
Owlshade had been dreading the day.
It started at the beginning of the moon, when Greenleaf was at its hottest. Wren had started to fade. When not asleep, curled up in her usual spot against the right wall of the elder’s den, she was almost entirely unresponsive. Questions were met with a weak chuckle, a whisker-twitch of acknowledgement, or just silence. She didn’t remember anyone anymore. A cat could introduce themself a thousand times, only for her to still ask who they were mere seconds later. She couldn’t eat anymore, since swallowing became difficult, and the medicine cats had to make sure she was fed through other means.
Owlshade tried. He tried to refresh her memory, to talk to her, to spend time with her, but…It was hard to talk to someone who spent a good portion of the day in a deep sleep, as if she were already crossing over to StarClan. Owlshade would wake up in the middle of the night in a panic, only settling down when he realized that Wren was still there. Still breathing.
Because a part of him pitied her, despite everything she did. It wouldn’t be fair to ostracize her when she couldn’t even remember what caused that scrutiny in the first place.
Now, it was getting late. The moon would be out soon. Owlshade was sitting in the clearing with Octet Rulekite, the two of them pressed close together with entwined tails. They were both silent, because there wasn’t much else to say.
Then, Addersnap approached. The dark brown molly, who Owlshade still saw as the tiny kitten waddling around a mostly empty camp, looked exhausted. Her tail drooped low to the ground, her ears pressed against her head, and it was clear she had been upset.
“Owlshade,” she greeted, voice hoarse from tears. “Wren wants to see you.”
Owlshade’s ears perked. Wren…Wanted to see him? Usually Wren didn’t want anyone specific.
Octet Rulekite nudged Owlshade, his muzzle brushing against the smaller tom’s neck in a gesture of both affection and sympathy.
“I recommend you go on and see her.” Octet Rulekite meowed.
Owlshade nodded, standing. He stretched his legs, looking over his shoulder as he padded towards the elder’s den. He saw Addersnap settling into the spot he had just been sitting in. Octet Rulekite wrapped his tail around her flank, pulling her closer. Addersnap took a deep breath, exhaled heavily, and began to cry.
“I’m going to miss her.” Owlshade heard her say.
“I know, sweetheart,” Octet Rulekite replied sadly. “I’m so sorry.”
Anxiety prickled Owlshade’s pelt as he turned away, his pace quickening. He didn’t know what to expect- Wren as he’d grown to know her over the past few moons, or…A corpse.
Owlshade prayed to StarClan he wouldn’t find a corpse. He pushed into the den, the moss that draped over the entrance catching on his white pelt, and looked around for Wren.
He saw her. She was awake, surprisingly, and she looked…Alive. Her eyes were clear and alert, her ears perked in interest, and she smiled a little when her eyes met Owlshade’s.
Owlshade forced a smile back. He padded over to the molly, settling beside her and tucking his paws beneath his body. His tail entwined with hers.
“Good evening, Wren.” He greeted back.
It was silent for a moment. Wren looked towards the roof of the den, as if she could see the sky through the walls, then sighed. “It’s quiet tonight.”
“Yeah,” Owlshade agreed with a nod. “Stars are out. The moon will rise soon.”
Wren let out a hum in reply.
“How are you…Feeling?” Owlshade questioned, glancing towards Wren.
“...A lot.” Wren murmured, after a pause.
Owlshade didn’t know how to reply. He simply nodded.
The two got to talking. About the weather, about clan events, about everything Wren had missed out on.
Owlshade noticed that Wren had gotten quiet. He leaned over, nudging her ear with his nose. “Talk to me.”
Wren sighed, allowing her shoulders to slump. “I was a bad cat.”
The words pierced through Owlshade’s heart like the claws of an angry badger. He looked at his ex-mate, whisker twitching to silently urge her to continue. Wren noticed.
“I was a horrible mate to you, a terrible mother, and…” She trailed off, giving her head a brisk shake. “...Other things have happened. To show that I was awful. And I know that words may not be enough…I know you hate me, Owlshade. But I just want you to know I’m so sorry. To you. To Aspenfall. To Addersnap, and Thistle, and…Brightpaw…”
“I don’t hate you. And Brightpaw’s death wasn’t your fault.” Owlshade corrected.
“...It was.” Wren stated. “And I’m sorry to her.”
Owlshade sighed, nodding. “...Okay. Continue.”
“Did you know…” Wren muttered. “...That Frozenbeam is my son?”
Owlshade shrugged. “You’ve mentioned it once or twice, yeah.”
“Well…I regret ever bringing such an awful cat to this world.” Wren hissed, a low growl coming from her. “If I had known that beautiful little kit would’ve grown to become…Him…I never would’ve had him.”
“I’m sure any cat would say the same.” Owlshade agreed.
Wren looked at Owlshade. Her eyes were narrowed. “Owlshade.”
Owlshade paused. He looked away, fidgeting in his spot. He thought of the pain Wren had inflicted many moons ago, the way she’d made Aspenkit cry, the way she’d made his heart hurt and feel like it was being torn brutally from his body. He really did think he hated her at that time.
But then he thought of the good. How he’d felt when they first became mates, how she’d been so fun to talk with about everything and nothing all at once, and how much he had trusted and loved her. He thought about how she was now, how he still cared for her, and how he did, in the back of his mind, still love her. She was remorseful. That was what mattered, right?
“I…Yes. I forgive you, Wren.” He finally said, smiling. “I’d be a terrible cat to not forgive you.”
“Thank you.” Wren rasped. She laid her head down, snuggling closer to Owlshade. “It’s getting dark. I’m getting…Very tired. Please don’t leave me to be alone, Owlshade.”
Owlshade wrapped his tail around Wren. “I’m not going anywhere.”
The next moments were spent in pure, suffocating silence. Owlshade had nothing more to say. He leaned down and began to gently groom Wren behind the ears and on the top of the head, purring softly to her. Wren let out weak purrs in response, her breathing shallow. She was smiling, at least.
After an hour, Owlshade froze. Wren had let out a heavy, shuddering sigh before going still, her body suddenly feeling heavy. Her pelt, which had been warm moments ago, was starting to cool. Her expression was still peaceful, as if she had simply fallen asleep after a long day.
“Wren?” Owlshade whispered. He nudged Wren’s cheek with his nose, her head simply lolling to the side like a limp piece of prey. “Wren, wake up.”
He knew it was useless. He’d seen plenty of death over the moons to know the truth.
Owlshade couldn’t bring himself to cry, or even feel sad. Instead, a heavy sense of relief washed over him, as if a weight that had been holding him down for a long time had been lifted.
He would report her death to the healers tomorrow. The vigil could wait, and the feelings could be processed later. All Owlshade wanted to do was live in the peace and ignore reality for a few more hours.
He settled down, resting his head, and reached out to put a paw over Wren’s cold one. A small smile, a real one, formed on his face. When he spoke, one last time before sleep overtook him, his voice was a quiet whisper, meant for Wren’s ears only.
“Goodnight, Wrenny. I love you.”
Wren faded more and more as the days went on, and was soon found dead in her nest.
