The REAL Postal Dude

reasons why i dont let myself post in the postal tags most of the time;

PSA //🍇without the g -DD

behold, the best thing i have ever created

you poopa stinka

[@scratch-thxt] *stares in mild disgust*

"You are the most repulsive person I have ever laid eyes on..."

"Listen we both know if he didn't get this stupid head wound I wouldnt be here, so I may as well get comfy. No Hate to ya alright."

Scratch tuts his tongue and follows in tow, reaching into his breast pocket and snatching his half-empty packet of cigarettes. He shakes one out and brings it to his lips.

"Not the proudest moment of mine, but yeah."

Scratch hums, digging around in his breast pocket for his lighter. He hisses quietly at himself. He forgot it at home.

"Yeah, here."

“ Speak of the devil.. Christ. ” He barely noticed his ice cream starting to melt over his fingers. “ It’s like he cruises on in when it’s most inconvenient. Can’t even shit-talk about him. ” He looks over to whatever the youngest Dude was scribbling down, but it was pulled out of his sight.

"That's not a good way to say hello you know, no wonder why we are all loners."

“Not like we were any wanted company in the first place, no offence guys. We’ve only got each other.”

"It all started in... this fellas mind right here"

“ Speak of the devil.. Christ. ” He barely noticed his ice cream starting to melt over his fingers. “ It’s like he cruises on in when it’s most inconvenient. Can’t even shit-talk about him. ” He looks over to whatever the youngest Dude was scribbling down, but it was pulled out of his sight.

"That's not a good way to say hello you know, no wonder why we are all loners."

ice cream Wednesday except it’s not Wednesday? Please? -Redux

Sweet!!

Hm.

i mean, you sure about the violent part, you do a lot of killing unprompted...

Not unprompted, I got my reasons. Mostly self-defense…

Fine, it looks unprompted, and yeah sure I'll knock on his door,

After some shuffling around and quiet meowing emanating from the house, the door opens.

Damn, you not looking to hot, you alright? Redux and I were going to grab some ice cream and have you come along, but looks like you need something a bit warmer...

“ I’m not sick. ” He hated that word.

Damn, alright, kind of a weird thing to do to a person, dump cats in their house, let's get you outa there for a bit might help with the congestion.

Yeah yeah, come on let's go, I also wanna talk about stuff once we get there. But we can talk now if you want

He sticks his hands in his pockets, head low, but on the lookout.

*the streets start to become more alive the further they walk into town, though still quite for its size, the people seem to avoid the pack of dudes without seeming too obvious,*

Yeah yeah, sure here,

“ Better not be about me seeing a hairdresser again, you saw what she did. ”

Ahhg, it's not that bad, yeah it's a little rough but your hair will grow out eventually, but no it's not about that. It's uh-wait.

He gets plain strawberry ice cream, and retreats to the booth.

ahh, come on! its your birthday Dude! and hell if i dont at least make the day a bit better then i dont know what id do,

You gotta do something for your birthday, dude. Dave would’ve dragged your ass outta the house if he was here…

Yeah, yeah, just that there's some really weird shit happening, like in my head, I'll let you guys finish your ice-cream first though, it's not urgent just, strange

“ Stuff in your head? — How long do you have your electricity going. Do you drink tap water . . ”

"hey, hey, calm down, its well, like a fucked up mirror of myself, and hell hes talked, through?, As?, me? Its weird, hell i saw him outside like a fucking cartoon character in a fucking bush watching us, then i blinked and then he was sitting at the counter."

I’ve bumped into him a few times, whispers, dunno what he’s saying. Disappears right after, like some kind of ghost…

"Well... I'm not sure, but I think he is."

"A mint chocolate chip shake please."