come as you are

When I see you in six months, or nine months or two years.

I want you be excited to see me

To show me how deep you fallen in love

That loosing our love opened your heart to falling

Head over heels, with the life you have learnt to love every day

I want you to understand that I needed to do the same. I want you to know I already grieve you because I need to make this space.

So I can also fall head over heels

With scenery and colours

With places and people

With the way it makes me feel

Good and bad

And patching myself up in the process

And learning to love that process

I feel like I love you more than I love life

My life

My 75 years, if I’m that lucky

I feel content that I don’t need anything else

But inside I know I want something else

And to deny this I will hurt myself

With missed opportunities

And missed feelings

And missed encounters

I deny myself the pleasure of things I wanted before you and still wanted with you

And in my heart I still want to find after you

And if we find ourselves in six months, nine months or two years.