all tangled up in it

I just ran five miles (pretty fast for me and that’s pretty far for me too to be real and raw with you) and now I’m waiting in this parking lot for a pizza I ordered because everything closes too early except for the shitty chain pizza and then I’m going to watch a movie As Yet To Be Determined or at least try to watch until the inevitable pass out and that is my account of a Friday night

Partial wallet contents

Friday night feeling like dry, poorly fertilized soil. Full of tea and noodles. There’s something in my eyes that I don’t recognize at least not yet. Soaked in the rain on the way home running, catch part of a movie, and then out again. Mindful of only certain parts of myself, extra mindful of my longing(s) because hitched heaviest wherever least needed. A body not next to mine, sensation not felt, eyes unseen. The tawdry game of self-definition via absences.

Raw materials

I should go to the ocean I should go to the prairie I should go to the desert. Text is from Anaïs Nin’s Collages. It’s raining where I am today and everyone has to say things like “we really needed it” because we did.

Sometimes you go here