Poffer

You'd just finished packaging them up when a head popped into the doorway, a certain mischievous fire ghoul approaching with a grin.

"Sodo. Don't even think about it." "Come on, you always make more than she can eat anyways."

You shoot the ghoul a glare which just serves to widen his grin. Rolling your eyes you turn around, box in hand, ready to sneak into the den and drop them off. You knew Sunshine would be in the gardens with Mountain by now, as Sodo had already told you that morning when you'd asked.

"You know, I could always drop them off for you? That way you don't have to risk getting caught." "Absolutely not. You'll just eat everything in here."

The ghoul practically pouts and you can't help but laugh,

"Don't worry, I made some just for you, they are in the containers in the back of the room."

Sodo perks up and practically runs to the back of the room, you shake your head with a smile and leave the room.

-----------------

You had been doing this for about a month now, where twice a week you'd bring a new baked goods to Sunshine -without her knowledge of course- and drop them off outside of her room.

Sodo had been trying to get you to fess up since you'd started, but you couldn't help but worry. After all, you and Sunshine barely talked as it was, so confessing to her was off the table.

Today you decided to step up from your usual pastries and bake a cake for her, a strawberry shortcake, to be specific. You'd over heard her telling the other ghoulettes of the pastries she had been receiving and heard her mention the cake as a favorite.

You were about halfway through the process when Rain walked in, and upon seeing you, smiled.

"You've been baking a whole lot recently. That wouldn't have anything to do with the weekly deliveries to a certain ghoulettes door, would it?"

You smiled back at the ghoul and nodded sheepishly,

"It beats actually telling her, there is no way I could face her like that." "Well, why not? She seems to be adamant on learning who has been leaving these things at her door. She has been infatuated with the notes you've been leaving with them."

You couldn't help but smile at the information, glad to know that she liked it, and wasn't weirded out by it. You thanked Rain and told him you'd think about telling her, eventually. You weren't quite ready for that step.

-----------------

Another month passed, and even you could tell Sunshine was determined. She stopped by the kitchens often in hopes of catching you, however thanks to Rain and Sodo, you knew when she'd be too busy to check the kitchens.

This was one such time.

The two ghouls sat in the kitchens with you, keeping you company while you baked -though it was less to keep you company than to get some of the extra baked goods you made.

The three of you were having a casual conversation, when Rain stopped suddenly and tensed. He and Sodo shared a look of concern before Rain suddenly stood and excused himself.

You looked at Sodo with a confused look but he just waved you off, that is, until the door bust open, and in walked Sunshine, followed by a sheepish Rain.

"I tried to stop her..." Was all he said as Sunshine stared at you in awe.

The two other ghouls quietly slipped out of the room as Sunshine made her way to you.

"I honestly never would have guessed you were the mystery baker." "Well, considering that was the point, I'll take that as a compliment."

The two of you stood in silence for a second, just taking each other in, when she began to step closer to you.

"I knew Sodo and Rain knew who you were, but they refused to tell me. I've been trying to catch you for weeks. I really liked the notes you wrote, and the pastries were incredible, but why did you never say anything?" "I was too scared. I mean, we've barely talked, so I felt like there was no way you'd like me back..."

She stepped around the counter so you were face to face and took your hands in hers.

"Well after all you've done, how could I not like you back? I've never had anyone go to such lengths for me."

You could feel the warmth radiating from your face as she drew closer, her lips a breath away from yours.

"I'd gladly be yours, if you'd have me?"

You were always curious about the building. No one said what it really was, and it took you until you were fifteen to figure out what it really was. A Satanic Temple of sorts. You had managed to find a book hidden in the storage room of the library you helped out at for some pocket money.

Now, a year later, you had read all of the books you could find on the place. You found that you could relate to their methodology and ideals in a way you never really could at the church your parents forced you to attend.

Each time you when to church with them, something felt wrong. Now, you finally figured out what it was. 

You didn’t want to tell your parents who you really were. The thought of coming out getting pushed deep down and locked away. Instead, you continued saving up your pocket money you earned from the library, in hopes that one day, you’d have enough to leave.

Unfortunately, that day didn’t get to come. When you entered your home after helping at the library, you were faced with your enraged parents and the Priest of your church.

They sat you down and asked questions about some rumors they had heard about your (gender/sexuality). You tried to give as vague of a response as possible, and with the promise of having a conversation with the Priest the next day at church, you were practically locked away in your room.

-----------------

You stared at the clock in your room, your nerves on fire. You were hyperaware of every noise your family made, and the second everyone seemed to settle for the night, you grabbed the bag you had stuffed under your bed.

You knew each of the soft spots of the house by heart at this point, having the habit of sneaking out to read some of the books on the Satanic Temple you’d stolen from the library store room.

Using that knowledge, you managed to make your way out the front door, taking a brief look back at the house you grew up in, a shot going through your heart at the thought of leaving.

As much as it hurt, you knew that nothing good would come of staying. You knew were you stood amongst your family, and now, amongst everyone else in the town. Word travels fast in small towns like your own. 

So, with your head down, tears in your eyes, and your shoulders squared, you began to walk away from the place you thought you’d never have to leave.

-----------------

You walked for hours, and as the moon was reaching its peak in the sky, you stumbled across the building you were always told to avoid. How you ended up here, you had no idea. Though, as you pull one of the old books you’d taken, you knew it was the place you had been reading about for about a year as you take in the stained glass image that was printed on the leather cover of the book in your hand.

You couldn’t see any movement in the building from where you stood, and you couldn’t help but feel nerves begin to creep up as you approached the door slowly.

The building itself was significantly larger than you had ever imagined, but you took a moment to appreciate its design. You had your back to the front door, and missed the way it opened slowly and tentatively. You also missed the head that poked through the small gap in the door. 

You didn’t, however miss the sharp gasp that fell from the person who had peeked out. You whirled around, equally as startled, and made eye contact with the man at the door.

The two of you stood there in shock for a moment before the man snapped out of his shock by a voice coming from behind him, “Cardi, what seems to be the problem?” 

The door opened wider to reveal a woman with a stern look that froze you in place. She glanced out before her eyes landed on you, and the stern look disappeared and turned more solemn.

She steps around the man -Cardi?- and holds an open hand out to you, “How about you come inside, dear? It’s rather cold out.”

You took a look back at the book in your hand before looking back at her. You figured you didn’t have much to lose, at this point, so you swallowed thickly and clutched the book to your chest before following her in.

You gave the man an awkward nod and smile as you passed, and he scrambled to shut the door behind you both before following after the two of you. If you weren’t so stressed out, you would have found it funny, but as you followed the woman through the halls, you felt like you could feel eyes on you from the shadows and it caused your skin to crawl.

The three of you approached a room, which she revealed to be a large kitchen. In it, a few people moved about near silently, pausing when the three of you walked in. She asked them to put some tea on, allowing you to pick the kind, before she lead you to some seats by one of the many large windows.

You took a seat, her and the man sitting across from you. The air was awkward and tense as you look around you, posture stiff. The woman was the first to break the silence, “My name is Sister Imperator. This is the Satanic Temple, and this here, is Cardinal Copia. I suppose you could say that I run this Temple.”

“I’m (Name)...” You set your book down, and spun it to face her, “I uh, kind of figured that’s where I was.”

She took the book gently, a curious look in her eyes, “Where did you get this? This is from our original library...”

“It was in the store room of a library in the town. I found it while doing a season clean out last year. I found it interesting, so I took it. I knew they would probably destroy it otherwise, with how they view the Temple...”

She proceeded to ask you a few questions, including what brought you to the temple at your age. You told her what you were comfortable with, hesitating to tell her about you rather... rough... coming out. She didn’t seem to be bothered by your identity in the slightest, but both her and the Cardinal seemed to bristle at how you were treated for it.

-----------------

Sister Imperator ultimately allowed you to stay at the Temple. She found an unoccupied room for you, setting you up in there for the night.

The next morning, Copia came to your room to bring you to his office where Sister Imperator was already waiting. There, the two went over life in the abbey. Sister explained your studies alongside the different chores through the abbey. 

She also warned you of the Ghouls you’d see, alongside the specter that is Papa Nihil. The information, of course shocked you, and you couldn’t help but doubt some of her words. You didn’t say much, and when they dismissed you to allow you to learn the layout of the abbey, you thanked them before slipping out of the room.

By now, many of the other Siblings of Sin were wandering about and working on their studies and tasks respectively. Many stopped to greet you and introduce themselves, and thankfully, they all seemed to be incredibly kind and accepting.

As you wandered the halls, you grew more and more comfortable. The other Siblings all giving you directions when needed, along with tips and tricks. None of them batted an eye at your young age, nor at your rather sudden appearance, which you were thankful for. 

One thing you did notice, however, was everyone’s warning about the Ghouls. Not all of them were bad, they all seemed to agree that Aether was kind and would be more than willing to help you, should you need it and run into him. Rain was pretty shy, and would probably take some time warming up to you. Mountain wasn’t mean, he was just quiet. Swiss and Sodo were the ones you wanted to worry about, Sodo more so than the former. You were told Swiss could be a bit much at times, but he means well. Sodo, however, you were told was the equivalent of a child firecracker.

You had yet to see any of these Ghouls, and while you wanted to doubt their existence, too many people had mentioned them for it to just be some kind of joke.

-----------------

It was when you entered the gardens that you finally saw them. 

You were trying to find your way back to the rooms, taking random doors that eventually led you out to the gardens. It was midday, and there was a slight chill to the air. It made the weather perfect, in your opinion.

You decided to take a seat on the railing of the gazebo you’d stumbled across to take a moment and take in everything that had happened in the last twenty four hours.

Footsteps and a handful of different voices pulled you from your thoughts, and you threw a look over your shoulder, doing a double take when you saw the ashen grey skin, tails and horns of what you supposed were the Ghouls.

They seemed to pause when they saw you at the gazebo, staring back at them. A look of realization crosses one of their features before they settle into a warm smile, “Ah! Hello! You must be the new Sibling Copia mentioned! My name is Aether.”

You tentatively introduced yourself, still slightly shocked. However, as they made conversation around you, you found yourself relating to them, in a way. It made you feel a bit more comfortable around them, and eventually you had no issues popping into the conversation with them.

You could feel the comings of overstimulation, so you kept quiet and focused on the different Ghouls around you instead. You took in the smell of pine from Mountain, the slight heat coming from Sodo, and the calming energy Aether exuded. 

As much as you loved traveling with Papa and the Ghouls, you had days were you struggled. You only had so much privacy on the tour busses and planes, leaving you with very few opportunities to collect yourself. 

You just hoped that today wouldn’t be one of the days where you fall over the edge. It was the last show on this leg of the tour, and you didn’t want to ruin it, knowing everyone was a little on edge. So you sat back and enjoyed the banter of your closest friends.

-----------------

When it was time for the Ghouls to head to their positions, you wished Sodo, the Ghoulettes and Papa good luck before following Mountain, Rain, Aether and Swiss to stage right. You often stood with Rain and Mountain prior to shows, knowing the two of them appreciated your presence before going on stage.

You tried to block out the loud murmur of the crowd as you focused on the two quieter Ghouls. You gave Mountain and Rain a hug, and Swiss and Aether a fist bump as they were given the cue to head to stage, and tucked yourself back by the different rigs as they got into position.

-----------------

You stuck around through the whole show, giving the Ghouls and Papa reassuring thumbs up and wide smiles, hiding your flinch every time a speaker peaked in volume or the crowd screamed. While you were able to hide your more obvious signs of overstimulation, you could feel the anxiety creeping up your throat and the dark claws of tunnel vision forming around your peripherals.

It took an intense amount of focus to congratulate each of the Ghouls and Papa as they filed off stage, giving hugs, high fives and fist bumps. 

The energy was high amongst everyone with the successful final show, and you stuck to the back of your group as you all headed to an open hall for a party to celebrate the first leg of the tour.

The Ghouls were all quick to split off and either find a drink, snack, or to hang around the mass of people dancing and laughing in the center of the room. You had forced yourself to go, as you knew most -if not all- of the Ghouls would stay back with you, and you didn’t want to take away from their celebration.

You forced yourself to mingle with some of the crew members, looking for your chance to leave. You made a mental head count of each of the Ghouls, and when you deemed them well distracted, you slipped out of the party hall.

The second you made it to the elevators to your hotel room, you physically deflated. Your shoulders dropped as you took a deep breath and you could feel tears prick at the corner of your eyes. You had yet to lose the tunnel vision, and if anything, it had gotten worse.

You could hear a vague ringing in your ears as the sudden change from the loud atmosphere to the silence was almost piercing. You rubbed softly at your ear in hopes of dulling the ringing and the pain that came with it. 

Your hands shook as you struggled to pull your room key from your pocket, nearly dropping it several times in the process. The second the door closed behind you, you froze. You just barely made it to the wall away from the door before your body completely shut down.

You slid down the wall, your breathing shallow as the ringing in your ears picked up and your vision clouded with tears.

-----------------

Rain was the first one to notice your disappearance. The second he couldn’t find you in the crowd, he panicked and grabbed Mountain. From there, the two made rounds to all of the other Ghouls before eventually realizing none of them had seen you since they entered the hall hours prior.

Anxiety flared up amongst the Ghouls, and they were all quick to say goodnight to whoever they were with before leaving the hall. Your scent still lingered in the hall and they were able to follow it up to your room.

As they approached the room, Aether could feel your distress, which only furthered his anxiety. He pulled out the spare key card he took from you and let them all in, where they saw you sat against the wall staring straight ahead with tears in your eyes and streaking down your face.

The image pained the Ghouls, knowing you were alone during this time. They were each quick to get to work, Aether grabbing your headphones and plugging them into his phone and playing some soft music. Once he placed the headphones on your head, Mountain picked you up and settled you on the bed, Rain and Sodo each curling up on either side of you.

You were incredibly overwhelmed, and felt as though you’d reached your cap. You felt like you couldn’t learn the material no matter how long you read it over, and no matter who helped you. The stress of your studies had been piling up for days, and was finally nearing its peak.

You had your head in your hands, fingers massaging your temples in hopes of relieving some of the pressure that was building in your head. The longer you sat there unsuccessfully, the more you felt tears begin to well up and the ball begin to lodge itself in your throat.

You didn’t want to draw the attention of the few other siblings in the room with your sudden change in mood, so when the tears finally did begin to spill, you pressed the heel of your palm into your eyes in hopes of blocking them. Your thoughts were screaming at you, telling you to ‘stop crying, don’t be a baby, it isn’t that hard’ and it just made the pressure behind your eyes become that much stronger.

Stuck in your head, you hadn’t notice the trio of ghoulettes come bounding into the library. They had felt your emotions building all day, and the second it all burst forward, they knew. The three were quick to make their way to you, deciding it was time for a much deserved break.

By the time the ghoulettes reached you, all of the other siblings of sin had cleared out, leaving the four of you alone. Sunshine took a seat to your left, Cumulus to your right while Cirrus stood behind you. It was the latter that pulled you out of your head with soft hands on either shoulder.

It startled you, and you tried to pull yourself together as much as possible before allowing them to see you. The second you pulled your hands from your face, you heard Cumulus whisper an ‘oh hun...’ before pulling you into her side.

The second her hands began to gently comb through your hair, you fully fell apart, sobbing into her side while her and the two other ghoulettes shared looks of worry over your head.

Sunshine gently pulled you up, placing her hands on your cheeks and wiping away the tears as they fell, “How about we head somewhere more private, darling?” You could only nod as the three helped you gather your things before bringing you back to your room. 

The three worked to make your room as comfortable as possible, Cumulus setting up a nice spot on the bed for all three of you while Sunshine and Cirrus made some snacks and a drink for you all.

The two of you had a tendency to ‘bump into each other’ quite often. Both of you finding random excuses to need the others presence. You knew neither of you were subtle, Swiss and Sodo teased you often for how love-sick you were.

Swiss and Sodo tried to give you advice or ideas, all of which you shut down. As much as you loved the two, their methods weren’t exactly the best. You knew that their usual charismatic and flirtatious ways wouldn’t have been the best route to take with the ghoulette. 

-----------------

When you did finally find Cirrus, she was with Sunshine, Mountain and Rain. She turned in your direction with a wide smile the second she smelled you approaching. Rain and Sunshine shared a look turning most of their attention to the earth ghoul as Cirrus all but skipped over to you.

“Hey hun! How’s it going? You’ve kept yourself holed up in the kitchens for a while today.”

“Yeah, I was actually coming to ask if you could try some of the recipes I was working on? I want a second opinion and you’ve always been really helpful.” The ghoulette was quick to agree, the two of you waving goodbye to the three other ghouls before she grabbed you hand and began to pull you in the direction of the kitchens while talking to you about the day.

-----------------

When the two of you re-entered the kitchen, the smell of fresh pastry hit the ghoulette. She looked out at the large spread of different pastries in awe. It never ceased to amaze her, how quickly you were able to make so many things all while making them look gorgeous.

She walked along the different pastries, listening to your description of each. Her eyes lighting up at the sight of one of her favorite pastries at the end of the line up, “I’m sure you know what this is... I thought I would make some for you, since I remember you telling me that finding these in bakeries on tour was one of your favorite things...”

She felt her face heat up slightly knowing you’d made them specifically for her, before she could properly thank you, the two of you heard a groan from the doorway of the room where Sodo was leaning against the doorway, exasperated, “Can you guys just kiss already? You’ve been pinning for each other forever.”

Before either of you could even blink, the ghoul disappeared down the hall, leaving you both gaping at where he once stood. It was when Cirrus started to giggle, before it turned into full laughter that you snapped out of it yourself. You couldn’t help but laugh alongside her.

-----------------

You made your way to the bed where Cirrus was laid out her arms outstretched for you. You fell into her arms, a content sigh leaving you as you buried your face in her neck. Her tail wrapped around your waist as she pressed a kiss to the crown of your head, “You think we should finally tell them?”

You thought about it for a second before shaking your head, “I want to see how long it takes for them to figure it out.”

You felt as though, right off the bat, Sodo had an issue with you. You figured it was because you were taking the spotlight of being the only lead guitarist from him, and because of that he held some resentment towards you. The rest of the ghouls, you were just worried you weren’t good enough or what they wanted in the new dynamic.

None of them made too much of an effort to introduce you to their dynamics, and that just made you feel more like an outsider. You felt as though you were a loose end, and that you weren’t meant to be with them, that it was some kind of mistake.

At your first practice with the ghouls, you felt as though they all had their eyes on you, each of them judging you. The second practice ended you took off, finding a spot to hide away from the rest of the ghouls in a dusty storage room.

You doubted you even needed to hide, they weren’t going to look for you anyways, you’d figured, but it gave you a sense of privacy as you sat back against the cool stone, letting it soak through your clothes and cool down your heated skin. You sat in that room for a couple hours, curled up, your hands holding your horns in a tight grasp as you took deep breaths to ease the bubble stuck in your throat.

-----------------

After that first practice, you spent a large majority of your free time in one of the many open practice rooms in hopes you could master the songs before next practice. When that practice came around, you had done much better than the first one, but still berated yourself for every mess-up.

While you were stuck in your own head, the other ghouls were rather impressed by how quickly you seemed to pick up on the different songs. They’d wanted to take a second to tell you about how well you were doing, but much like the last practice, you ran off before any of them could catch you.

They figured that you may still be pretty nervous in the new environment and decided to give you some space, and let you come to them when you were ready.

That all changed when Aether found you after a practice session in your usual hiding spot after Copia told the quintessence ghoul to grab some stuff out of storage for him. Because of the dust, the ghoul didn’t smell your presence and you didn’t smell his. He did, however, hear your ragged breathing and the quiet mumbles of you berating yourself for small mistakes.

He frowned when he heard you say, “This is why they hate you.”

Aether took the learned information straight to the other ghouls, and they all felt a bit guilty for not noticing sooner.

-----------------

The next time you entered the ghoul den, each of the ghouls greeted you cheerfully, which shocked you a bit. You gave them a nervous wave before slipping into the kitchen where you saw Mountain and Rain standing in front of a cabinet with an abundance of different herbs and flowers.

The taller of the two turned and greeted you before asking for your opinion on which tea should be made for the group. You hesitantly told him your favorite tea, and the earth ghoul seemed pleasantly surprised, his tail swaying happily behind him as he got to making it.

Rain rounded the counter and gestured for you to take a seat with him. When you did, he and Mountain struck up a random conversation, looking for your input on occasion. When the tea finished, all of the ghouls poured into the room and took seats on various chairs and countertops.

They all tried to include you in the different conversations being had, and you felt yourself begin to relax a bit in their presence. It was still a bit odd to you, but for the first time since your summoning, you felt as though you belonged.

From then on, you got more comfortable with the ghouls. You were more talkative, hung around the den more often, and actually stuck around after practices. They helped to make sure you felt a part of the group, even Sodo, who after a while, would joke with you about stealing his spotlight.

-----------------

When your first tour was announced, you could only feel an overwhelming sense of dread. You had been doing well during practices, you knew you were, but that didn’t make you feel any more prepared for the actual performances. 

The other ghouls felt your nerves and each took as much time as they could to reassure you you would do great.

Aether offered to run some extra practices with you, sometimes having a few other join in as well. He would set up days with each of the ghouls so that you could practice with different aspects also playing alongside you.

Sodo tried to help you master any of the riff you had been struggling with a bit, doing them with you and helping you find your stage gimmicks with the help of Swiss.

Swiss mostly tried to take your mind off of the upcoming tour, distracting you with jokes, random meaningless tasks and sometimes just asking to hang out with you. He tells you a bit about shows and what to expect, hoping that it will help you mentally prepare as well.

Mountain and Rain both help with different exercises that help them when they get anxious. With the two of them being on the more reclusive end of the ghoul spectrum, they understood your anxieties the best. 

-----------------

You appreciated each ghoul for helping you, however, as you stood on stage right with Aether, Swiss and Rain, you felt your anxiety surge once again. When he noticed, Rain took your hand gently, giving it a reassuring squeeze while Aether and Swiss shot you reassuring smiles.

When you were given the clear to head on stage, each ghoul gave you a thumbs up and a pat on the back, telling you they’d be by your side the whole time. With that, you took a deep breath and stepped onto the stage.

As you got into place, you took a look at all of the ghouls around you, each of them giving you some form of reassurance. Knowing you had each of their support, despite the rocking beginning you all had, made you feel much better. 

Looking back you shot a thumbs up to Mountain and Rain who both nodded and gave you one back.

You could hear the excited murmur of the crowd as they waited for the show to start and the curtain to drop. You shook out your limbs once more before getting yourself into the proper position, hands placed on the chords to start. 

You could hear the ending of Deus Culpa, once of the many instrumentals they played while you all prepped the stage before getting the clear to start the chords for Imperium.

Swiss started it off with the acoustics, and you could hear the crowds murmur get a little louder as the lights hit your back. You, Sodo, Aether and Mountain joined in with your own parts.

You grinned wide as the ending chords to Imperium rang out, as the crowd screamed as Kaisarion started and the curtain dropped.

You couldn’t see beyond the first couple lines of the crowd due to the lights, but almost immediately you began to dance around behind Copia who just shook his head at you in amusement as he began his stage route.

You bounded across center stage, taking your place next to Sodo as you both did the solo in alteration. You gave him a nod and a salute to the crowd on his side of the stage as you headed over to where Aether stood on Stage right.

The two of you playfully bumped shoulders a couple of times before you, Sodo and Aether ended up on center stage together, Rain coming up from where he was with Mountain to join the three of you.

As the instrumentals died down to give Copia his solo moment, you interacted a bit with the crowd. You made silly poses for a couple of pictures and videos before jumping back into the song, ending up at the mic stand with Aether, the two of you joining in the backing vocals as the first song of the set came to a close.

-----------------

The show was going well, and you were coming up on the mid point with Year Zero. You were stood back with Swiss during one of Copia’s longer talks, goofing off with the multi-ghoul.

As Copia finished off his talk the lights dimmed a bit and you waved you brief goodbye to Swiss before navigating the now dark stage to your opening spot for Year Zero. 

You and Sodo started your chords, each of you clearing space for Copia in his third outfit change to enter center stage.

As the chorus began to pick up, you did your usual stomps along the stage, not noticing the slight dip in the stage next to you as you slammed your foot down, feeling your ankle roll awkwardly and practically hearing it crack.

You grimaced and your movements faltered for a second before you threw on a face, continuing with the song. You hoped your adrenaline from the show would be enough to keep you from feeling it until the very end as you took your place next to Sodo for you next solo.

-----------------

By the time you made it to Square Hammer it was taking everything in you to make your trembling less apparent. You’d begun to feel the pain as He Is started, with the slower pace of the song, and by Mummy Dust you could tell the other ghouls knew something was off.

As Square Hammer was nearing, you took a deep breath and prepared for the worst of the pain to come.

The second you, Sodo, Aether and Rain made it to center stage, you tried to keep weight off of your injured foot. You’d managed to keep the blow softer and tried to use your other foot for more of the brunt force.

Your jaw was tight in your effort to avoid making your pain too obvious to the crowd, and focused on your part and getting through the song, finding brief relief in solo moments in the song where you and Sodo just stood side-by-side.

-----------------

When the song ended and Sorrow In The Wind started playing, you forced yourself into the line with the other ghouls and Copia for final bow.

As everyone began to part ways to throw their pics and have their moments with the fans, Swiss and Mountain took a place on either side of you. Swiss threw and arm around you, prompting you to do the same, where he took most of the weight off your injured side.

Mountain leaned down and told you to hold on a little longer as the three of you made your way along the stage, trying to act as natural as possible.

When you all finally made it backstage, you practically collapsed into Swiss. The multi-ghoul had no problems keeping you up as the other ghouls all surrounded you. Sunshine and Cirrus scolded Sodo as the fire ghoul crowded up to you, having everyone take a step back so Swiss could bring you to a medic for a check in.

Copia took a couple of the ghouls with him to let the VIP fans know there would be a slight delay as you got checked on. Swiss, Mountain and the ghoulettes brought you to the medic, Cumulus and Cirrus stressing over you while Mountain scolded you for not saying something during the show.

While the medic checked you over, Mountain and Sunshine had to hold you attention so you would stop squirming and let the nurse do what she needed. She ended up wrapping up your ankle tight and handed Mountain some crutches, telling you to avoid walking on it for at least two weeks.

-----------------

You were glad it was the last show for about a month, and that you would have plenty of time to heal for the next show, however not even a full day into your recovery you were already restless.

Aether and Sunshine fretted over you constantly, making sure you didn’t need or want anything. Cirrus and Mountain would scold you if you tried to do anything that would agitate or disrupt the healing process. Swiss and Rain often kept you company when you were bored and Sodo and Cumulus did whatever they could to cheer you up and give you something to do.

You were thankful for each of them as they made the healing process at least a little more bearable. By the time the next tour show came around, you were cleared to perform. 

When you looked up, you could see his eyes practically glow in the darkness of the small closet. You could see him ready to say something when the door swung open to reveal a furious Copia, who glared at the two of you, his face red in his annoyance. 

You and Sodo looked over at each other before bursting out of the room and taking off down the hall, laughing like maniacs.

-----------------

This wasn’t the first instance the two of you found a way to prank Copia. You usually left most of the planning to Sodo, you took to making sure the two of you would have little to no problems getting in and out. You often would distract the Papa, having him help you with something while Sodo snuck in to do whatever he needed.

More often than not it would lead to a scolding from Aether and a supportive pat on the back from Swiss. As often as the multi-ghoul would try to join the two of you in your endeavors, Sodo would shoot him down almost immediately.

To Sodo, it was his way to do something personal with you while on tour. Like a bonding experience the two of you shared, and he wasn’t about to let Swiss swoop in and interject himself into something that was meant for the two of you.

That thought gave Sodo an idea.

-----------------

You were rather hesitant when he brought it up to you. You knew some would take it better than others, like Swiss and the ghoulettes. Ultimately you agreed, knowing you wouldn’t be able to deny the fire ghoul.

The first of the ghouls to get pranked by Sodo was Swiss. While the prank was mostly harmless, Sodo made sure to throw in a few things to subtly tell the multi-ghoul to back off -which he didn’t.

Swiss knew right away that it was the two of you. He knew your handy work quite well by now, and knowing that Sodo viewed him as a threat amused him. However, he found himself to be rather annoyed with the constant pranks Sodo threw at him whenever he’d get too close to you, so he backed off eventually.

-----------------

Aether was next on Sodo’s list. Though it seemed that the quintessence ghoul knew well before you ever even tried. Aether would dodge every single prank you and Sodo laid out for him. You figured he’d gained a sixth sense for your shenanigans. 

That didn’t stop Sodo from making his attempts, and finally -after way too many tries- he was successful. The larger ghoul spent about an hour running around after him yelling at the fire ghoul, he didn’t however, say anything to you. Aether had a soft spot for you and knew you were just going along with the fire ghoul, and that you weren’t the one coming up with most of the pranks.

-----------------

The ghoulettes were never mad for long, with Cumulus laughing her ass off at the shocked faces of the other two. Cumulus was able to convince Cirrus and Sunshine to start a prank war -which only proved to stress Copia and Aether out even more.

-----------------

Mountain was completely unamused with the whole thing. When you and Sodo pranked him, he just picked the two of you up -one of you over each shoulder- before tossing you outside of his dressing room with an annoyed huff, and shutting you out.

The earth ghoul kept a closer eye on the two of you after that. Sodo tried to steer clear of the taller ghoul, he was a little intimidated by him at times. 

-----------------

Rain just seemed to be pretty confused. He didn’t see what was so entertaining about the pranks, but he could see how happy it made you and Sodo, so he let it happen. You knew he -more often than not- knew when a prank was coming, and you kind of felt bad. 

You told Sodo, and the fire ghoul agreed to leave the water ghoul alone.

-----------------

The last thing Sodo was expecting was for you to pull a prank on him. You’d planned it out with the other ghouls and Copia, and with their help set everything up. The fire ghoul was so busy setting up his own pranks he didn’t realize what you had been preparing.

When he came back to the dressing room, he froze. He felt a little betrayed, but also, he was quite proud of you. He did have a reputation to uphold, however. So when he broke out of his shock he took off after you where he could hear your laughter down the hall.

You had been going over every conversation and every action from the day as you paced outside the doors to the congregation hall. The chiming of the clock tower bells signaled the beginning of mass, so you finally bit the bullet and slipped into the room, taking a seat at the back of the hall.

You had already zoned out the second Papa began to announce that he and his ghouls would be performing a set, the loud cheers of the Siblings of Sin sent a shock through you and you flinched, feeling your nerves electrify.

-----------------

It only seemed to get worse from there. The overstimulation began to reach an overwhelming point. You could feel the beginnings of a full breakdown approaching and your fingers began to twitch in you lap. You gripped the fabric of your pants in hopes of quelling the tremors that seemed to run up your body.

It felt like you were underwater. All of the noise around you reduced to a dull thump that shook your brain. When you tried to take a deep breath, it froze in your lungs and settled like a brick, and froze your airways.

You hadn’t even realized that mass had ended and members of the clergy were making their way out of the hall. The tremors and twitches had reached your neck, sending your head jolting every few seconds. The twitches got so aggressive, they were beginning to send a spiking pain down your shoulders and up the back of your neck.

You hadn’t noticed, but you had begun to mumble incoherently, and your hands had started coming up and down, hitting against your thighs repetitively. When the door to the hall slammed shut, you curled up, and the swinging of your hands shifted from hitting your lap to the sides of your head as you squeezed your eyes shut.

Every small sound bounced off the inside of your head, sending spiking pain every time it made contact. You were so stuck in your breakdown, you didn’t realize your ghouls had come rushing off stage to you until you felt a couple gentle taps against your hand.

The contact seemed to snap you out of your trance, gasping, your eyes snapped open and frantically darted between the ghouls in front of you. Rain tapped you a few times -a code you had made- asking if he could touch you. When you nodded, he gently took both of your hands and brought them down between the both of you, allowing you to swing them back and forth. 

Next, Aether did the same taps, gently cradling your neck when you nodded, softening the twitches in your neck as he pressed his forehead against yours.

The other three ghouls surrounded you guys, their tails coiling around your arms and rubbing your back until you managed to calm down. When the stimming stopped and your hearing cleared, you gently tapped Rains hands a few times to tell him you were better. Exhausted and unable to speak, but better. He relayed the taps, and the ghouls got to work helping you up.

They shifted you so Mountain could pick you up gently and Swiss pulled out a pair of noise cancelling headphones for while you made your way to the ghoul den. You buried your head in the earth ghouls chest as you all made your way out of the congregation hall and started to the den.

As they walked, each of them quietly made a plan, and the second they stepped into the den, each ghoul went their separate ways. 

Mountain and Sodo headed to Mountains room, Mountain placing you on his bed softly. Sodo took his place next to you and held your hand while Mountain pulled out some incense, lighting a mellow one that was meant to relieve stress without being too strong. Once he did that, he returned to your side and pulled you onto his chest, holding you tightly while Sodo went to heat the room to the temperature you like.

Meanwhile, Rain ducked into his room, finding his weighted blanket he knew you loved after a particularly rough stimming episode, running to Mountains room with it. He smiled softly at the sight of you and Mountain together. Joining the two of you, he tucked himself into yours and Mountains side while tucking the weighted blanket around you all.

Swiss was digging through his closet finding clothes of his he knew you liked, bringing them back with him and setting them down on the counter in the bathroom. He went back into the room and sat at the edge of the bed as they all waited for Aether.

Said ghoul was in the kitchen making your comfort food and drink, rushing it to the room where all of the other ghouls were gathered. He set the tray on the nightstand before using the tap code to see how you were doing. You relayed to him that it was okay for them to talk, but you were too exhausted to yourself.

“Alright love, Swiss put some clothes on the bathroom counter for you. Why don’t you go throw those on and you can come and eat something.” Aether spoke softly, not wanting to overstimulate you right away, and helped you up when you nodded.

After throwing on Swiss’s clothes, you went back to the room, Aether handing you the food and drink. The ghouls made quiet conversation around you as you ate, not wanting you to feel uncomfortable while doing so.

When you finished, Aether grabbed the tray and ran it out to the kitchen while the ghouls formed a nice cuddle pile, each pressing a kiss to your forehead or temple as the all settled down around you.

Aether returned with your comfort movie in hand, putting it on at a low volume before joining the group of you in the bed.

He could feel the heat coursing through him, and could vaguely smell the burning of the fabric of his clothes but he was so caught up in his anger he didn’t even really notice. 

He shot glares at any of the siblings who looked at him in the halls, the sharp hiss that followed sending them running. When he made it to the den, he practically threw the door open, the door smacking the wall loudly and starting you, who was sat reading a book on the couch.

You could see the heat waves coming off the ghoul and frowned, he was so caught up in his anger as he paced back and forth he didn’t even notice you in the room.

The other ghouls followed in behind him, Aether looking exasperated as usual, and Swiss snickering at the fire ghoul who was actively burning through the fabric of his clothes, smoke rising from his body and mixing with the heat waves that rippled around him.

The glare Sodo shot him was venomous as he hiss at the multi-ghoul, the threat of sending him back to hell falling off his tongue vehemently. Swiss just laughed, throwing his hands up and side stepping where the fire ghoul made to swipe at him.

“Alright, enough, both of you. Swiss, stop antagonizing him, Sodo, you’re burning through your clothes, please calm down.” Swiss dropped himself on the couch across from you, sending you a playful look which you rolled your eyes at.

Sodo cursed at Aether, who continued to try to calm the ghoul. You shut your book and placed a hand on the larger ghouls shoulder with a quick ‘I’ve got this’ as you stepped around him.

You stepped to be in front of Sodo so he wouldn’t accidentally burn you. When he looked up at you, he was ready to snap, but when he saw it was you in front of him, he calmed down immediately.

The heat waves disappeared, and his tail went to a gentle sway compared to the aggressive flicking it was at before. There was still a bit of smoke from light embers coming off his clothes, but they stopped after the embers were no longer being fueled by his heat.

You held your arms open, and the ghoul fell into them, his head tucked into your neck as he took a deep breath, taking you in. He wrapped his arms and tail around you tightly, a gentle purr coming from him as you raked your fingers through his hair gently.

You pressed a kiss to his temple before asking if he wanted to go to his room. He nodded into your neck, before pulling away. He kept himself close to you, a tight grip on your hand as he followed you.

You shot Swiss one last warning look seeing his shoulders shake as he held in a laugh at how placated the ghoul was now.

-----------------

The second the door to his room shut, Sodo wrapped himself around you again, leaving you to drag both of you to the bed. When you fell down onto it, you wrapped your arms around the ghoul, running your fingers through his hair again.

His tail was wound tightly around you, the spade flicking back and forth gently at you back. His face was still buried in your neck, where you could hear his gently purrs picking back up.

“Do you want to take about it love?” The ghoul let out an incoherent mumble, pulling you closer.

You told Sister Imperator, but she’d waved it off as an active imagination. You kept having smaller visions of things that didn’t seem of much importance. It scared the hell out of you at first, but you didn’t want to tell Sister until you had a vision of something more important.

That came during the beginning of Secondo's reign as Papa. You had a vision of the major change he would bring, with him dropping the papal robe and paint at some point during his reign. You told Sister Imperator of this, and she seemed to want to wave it off again, but kept an eye on Secondo anyways.

The day it happened, Sister Imperator was shocked. She figured you were just very imaginative, however now she could tell it was a little more than that. She had you start telling her of all of your visions from there-on-out, no matter how big or small.

It didn’t really feel quite real until she witness you having one of your visions. She panicked when your eyes rolled back and you went completely limp. She worried you were about to have a seizure of sorts, but you quickly came to, gasping, telling her one of the ghouls was going to break a window.

She was not very happy when she found the broken window three days later.

-----------------

During Terzo’s reign as Papa, you’d had a vision of the Papa getting dragged off and killed during a ritual. The vision devastated you, as you were close with all of the Papa’s having grown up around them all. You went to tell Sister Imperator, and you could see her eyes darken before she told you not to tell anyone, especially not Terzo.

It felt wrong, and every time you saw Terzo, you couldn’t help but feel a pit of guilt. You avoided him and Sister Imperator to the best of your ability for a while, locking yourself away for several days as you processed your vision. 

You’d never had one of this severity, and knowing Sister Imperator seemed to have something to do with what you saw made you feel sick. You followed her instructions, however, and the day Terzo was killed you locked yourself away for weeks.

-----------------

When Copia was selected to replace Terzo you were hesitant. You didn’t have anything against the Cardinal, you actually liked him a lot. He often helped you with your studies when the two of you found yourselves in the library at the same time. You were more worried about the outcome of his reign. You hadn’t had any visions of him as Papa yet, but somewhere within you, you could feel dread pooling.

It took a while for Papa Nihil to accept Copia as the newest Papa. He found the Cardinal to be much too immature for such an important role, but you had come to know Copia well, and knew there was much more to the man than an awkward and anxious mess. 

He always seemed to know what strings to pull, and what buttons to press. Where to be and who to be seen with. It kind of scared you how cunning he really was. Every time you saw Copia with the two church leaders, he would shoot you a playful wink before falling into the character of the awkward and immature Copia.

When you asked him, he just pressed a finger to his lips in a shushing motion, telling you ‘it was all in due time’ before switching topics.

-----------------

Sister Imperator had told you not to tell anyone of your visions if possible. She didn’t want it to become something people attempted to use you for. You knew it was a little more than that, she didn’t want some of your visions being released to people who weren’t supposed to know. Like your vision of Terzo.

You usually could tell when a vision was approaching, as you head would get hazy and your vision would whiten around the edges. It usually gave you enough warning to slip away from people and into a secluded space while it passed.

Today, however, you had agreed to join the ghouls and Copia at practice. The ghouls hadn’t seen you in a few days and were practically begging Copia to invite you. During any down time they had, you all would make casual conversation, joking around with each other.

You were so wrapped up in your conversations and laughing at the ghouls bickering, you didn’t notice the beginnings of you vision this time.

When it hit, you had just stood up to pick up one of the flyaway pics from Sodo and Aether’s mini-battle. The second your knees gave out, Swiss -who was closest- jumped forward to catch you. This caught the attention of all of the other ghouls, who immediately rushed forward to check on you.

Copia sent word to Imperator, who entered the room not even five minutes later. The moment she saw you were awake, she asked you what you saw. Based on the dazed look on your face, she could tell whatever it was, wasn’t good.

She allowed the ghouls and Copia to cut practice early so the ghouls could bring you back to your room. She figured with the daze you were in, she could wait to find out, and allowed the others to take care of you in her stead.

-----------------

When you were finally able to come out of your daze, Aether was first to speak up, “Are you okay? Swiss was able to catch you before you hit your head or anything, but you passed out.”

“I’m fine. It happens pretty often. Usually I can tell when it’s coming, I guess I was too distracted to notice this time.” The ghouls all frown, now knowing you go through this regularly.

Once they were sure you were okay, Sodo was quick to jump into the questions, “So... what was that anyways? And why did Sister Imperator ask you what you saw?” 

“It was a vision. I guess you could say I’m an oracle of sorts.” They all seemed to be in awe of the new information, each of them spouting off questions of what you saw, and what you have seen before.

Aether cut them off with a glare, “Guys, come on. Don’t overwhelm them. They just passed out, whether normal for them or not, it’s bound to take a lot out of them. We’ll let you rest, (Name).” 

He then proceeded to usher the other ghouls from the room who mumbled their protests, saying they’d be back later with their questions. You waved them off with a laugh before settling into your bed.

When you tired to close your eyes the vision just kept replaying. The image of Copia being kill, just like Terzo.

You felt the pooling of dread and guilt once again and decided you weren’t going to make the same mistake as last time.

-----------------

You managed to make it to Copia’s office without being spotted by Sister Imperator, who you nearly ran into several times on you way to Copia’s office.

You slipped into the room quickly after knocking, and Copia smiled when he saw you, “Ah! You are okay! I am glad mio caro amico. The ghouls came and told me what happened. An oracle, eh? And you didn’t tell me?” 

You could tell his tone was teasing, but it just furthered the sickening guilt you felt, “Copia... I have to tell you what I saw. I made the mistake of not telling last time, and I’ve regretted it since. I can’t do it again.”

He looked at you in concern, putting down whatever was in his hands, and focusing his full attention on you, “I saw you die. Copia. Just like Terzo. They are going to kill you...”

You heard him let out a sigh, his gaze falling, “Ah. Yes. I had a feeling that was going to happen.” You stared at him in shock, surprised with how well he was taking the news, when he saw you look, he gave you a sad smile, “I was aware of the possibility of me dying in this position when it was offered to me, mio amico.”

“But, I can tell you how, and I’m sure I can figure out when, and it can be avoided!” He just raised his hand to stop you, a resigned look on his face.

“It is going to happen no matter what. If we try and avoid it as you saw it, it will come back another way. Besides, I get the feeling you were not supposed to tell me, and I do not want you getting into any more trouble.”

You tried to argue with him, but he refused to listen. You felt defeated, a saddened look in your eyes as you watch one of your closest friends resign to the fate he’d been dealt. You could feel the tears in your eyes as he made his way to you.

“I will make use of the time that I do have. I will prove myself, and when the time comes, I will accept my fate, for I have done all that I wanted.” He pulled you into a tight hug, “I am grateful to have had you by my side through my reign. You have been a wonderful friend. We still have time, so let us not dwell on the sadness of it and make use of the time we have left.”