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     “ ....... There’s no way that man is straight. “ 

His gaydar is going off the charts. Or his pan-dar, as the case may be. 

     “ You mean that horse? That fictional horse on the television right now? “ 

     “ I’m pretty sure Bo/Jack Horse/man is reality TV, Colonel. Can you get with the times, please? “ Cue the Colonel’s sighing off to the side. “ I’m sorry, but there’s just no way. He tries too hard to be straight. No average straight man out there goes out of their way to be such a hoe unless they’re trying to prove something. “

     “ What’s your excuse? For the hoe-ing. “ 

     “ -- OH! I have been to jail before. “ 

     “ ... H--. “ 

     “ Just for a little while though, who can remember why. I made quite the following of buddies while I was there. That was the time we all ganged up on the Slenderman, do you remember that? “ 

     “ Do YOU remember that? Is that something you remember? “

Well, the very least she could do is present it to his face. Although, maybe it was for his own well-being - and less for hers - that someone just left it off to the side for him. 

It’s a good thing nobody really makes use of the basement but him, for the most part. 

He’s immediately put-off by the cover, hesitating for a moment before he decides to flip it over and hazard a glance at the back cover. Milford’s mumbling to himself as he reads, and after a few moments, he sets it back down on the table - picture-side down - and puts his free hand over his mouth. Good lord, what does that girl think he is? Who reads this stuff? 

     “ ... God dammit. “