Just found out one of my best friend of three years had no idea how to pronounce my last name. So instead he just waited until I said it

That moment you realize you might have fucked up the relationship (friendship or otherwise) and if you hadn’t said anything then maybe he would be texting you right now. 

If I start talking to myself it’s not because I’m crazy or I’m trying to talk back, It is literally just me trying to cope when I’m nervous, anxious, or I have a lot on my mind. It helps me focus on whatever I am doing. So you saying “You talk to yourself so much” or “ Use your words” doesn’t help me, okay? okay

When I ask you a bunch of questions it’s not because I'm trying to annoy you or because I an idiot, it’s because I want to be thorough. Also if something happens  and you ask “why did you do that?” I can replay with confidence “BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME I COULD” 

I was once teaching karate to these two five year old  students, a girl and a boy. After teaching the girl a few basic moves, I moved onto the boy who was a bit unsure of what to do. I reassured him that it was okay if he didn’t remember and that I was there to help him. That is when the little girl chimed in and said “it’s okay, I’ll protect you”. Out of curiosity, I asked “what happens if you are not there?”, She replies “I’ll be there” and then she hugged him. 

Today, I was really bored during Chemistry so I texted my friend to entertain me. He asks “What class I’m in , and where” I let him know, and figure he will wait outside. No, instead he walks in with 15 minutes left in class, sits down next to me and just starts to take pictures of me on snapchat. I have weird friends. 

So I was watching “Into The Badlands” and maybe I’m a bit behind, but isn’t the first dead girl that Sunny turns over, the zombie girl from the first episode of “The Walking Dead”? 

I thought of something funny, and then I forgot...

I have the flirting ability of a mushroom. No wonder I can’t attract guys, also my new dora the explorer haircut doesn’t help. Tumblr teach me! how to be attractive toward the opposit sex?

That heart sinking moment when you are in class and you crush is flirting with the new girl. That's when you realize she has more of a chance than you do.