apart of me

Doing things for others expecting nothing in return is a type of high you can't describe like floating on cloud 69 with your heart filled with joy and your mind as clear as a full moon in the midnight sky.

I'll be me authentically I'll never owe an apology to someone who is thriving in misery with twisted thoughts and diving insecurities. I'd rather feel free and just do me then live with this hypocrisy.

This is my life I make my mistakes when will I learn all that can ever come of this is my tears and trying to put out the flames around my heart because I know now more then ever that we are truly meant to be forever apart.

All I can hope to be is within me lift myself up and feel your grace fill me with endless ways of sweet ambiguity. Delicious waves of desire cling to the life I aspire.

Let it flow the world around you go and feel the light that shines in your own minds eye. Breath in a new day step out into the world with a smile on your face no one can stop your growth and your grace.

I must focus on me my heart my health my life I matter. Your opinions mean nothing except maybe that you and me are just apart of my memories never truly meant to be.

I wish it was me that was the girl in your dreams, the woman you long for beneath your sheets. Only to be the heart that brings fire so hot you get weak in the knees. Instead I'll stay quiet and silently believe that maybe one day you will love me for me.

You break me down your blame game has no shame you freak me out your mind games are insane I'm feeling crazy now going numb in my membranes I'm still praying now for the strength to live again.

I feel like things never work. I drive myself insane all my thoughts turn negative and my heart feels nothing but pain. Why can't I let you go just leave it alone turn all of my emotions into stone. Maybe then I could finally be happy on my own.

Why won't you talk to me my hearts bleeding passionately. Your smile is all I want to see. If only I could make you happy it would give me the ultimate peace.

My thoughts scattered and screaming can't stop the racing. My mind is left burning there is no escaping. My heart yearns my soul cries my life is filled with sickness and lies. All I want is to be true and spend my life next to you.

Always left wondering how did we go wrong. I do it to myself I can't keep holding on to some fantastic fantasy that makes me feel whole. Yet when my mind clears and the fog is all gone I am left all alone.