broken

maybe i do have some sort of feelings for you? But i hate that i do bc this is supposed to be my selfish era and do whatever w no regard for anyone. But imma keep telling you that ur my friend

Depression is a bitch and it creeps up on you even though you feel like you’re good.

I just want to run away. Run from it all. It’s coming back. The insecurities, the feelings of being useless, not good enough. I just don’t know what to do. I do i push myself to get back up and get motivated again. To gain my confidence back. It’s so shitty to feel like you’ve made so much progress only to feel like you’re relapsing and go back to square one. How do I better myself. How do I feel good and productive. I just feel stuck at this point and I hate it. I wanna hide. I’m embarrassed of who I am/who I’ve turned into. This is so shitty

Fuck why am i reverting back to my past self. I hate when i do this shit. I know better and could be better. I guess fear controls me. And the safest bet to keeping you and not hurting u or having obligations is just being better off as friends.