cold little heart

I have an end-of-life patient to whom I spoke today. She burst out laughing and said, "It was all such fun. I just had so much fun." I wish this for everyone. I wish that we each would meet death laughing, with little regret and even less fear.

funny thing about anxiety is sometimes it kind of breaks your sense of danger. like i am known for repeatedly putting myself in situations that make my friends go "bro you couldve died. werent you scared?" and the answer is 👍 yjeah. i did it scared. i do everything scared. i didnt know that was the actual important kind of scary because i usually have to ignore my fears to function in society. it will happen again. watch out.

funny thing about anxiety is sometimes it kind of breaks your sense of danger. like i am known for repeatedly putting myself in situations that make my friends go "bro you couldve died. werent you scared?" and the answer is 👍 yjeah. i did it scared. i do everything scared. i didnt know that was the actual important kind of scary because i usually have to ignore my fears to function in society. it will happen again. watch out.

they were right btw. you have to dig yourself out of your grave over and over again

dislike how many mental health posts on here are just "you've never done anything wrong in your life ever and they were evil for that"

maybe you did do something wrong. maybe you hurt someone. maybe you have said awful things. maybe you were just as bad as them. maybe. but what matters is that you move on. you have to try. you have to wake up and be kinder. you have to learn and listen and grow. maybe you did do something wrong but that doesn't mean you have to keep doing that. as long as you are alive, you can change

am I unforgivable or is it just thursday

For the sake of your mental health, let people think what they want. Their fiction is not your truth.

You can be the kindest person ever and people will still find a way to dislike you. Just let them. I promise it will be so freeing.

I think a lot of the time, people ignore the fact that someone being closeted and someone not coming out explicitly are two different things. Just because a public figure hasn’t screamed their queerness from the rooftops, that doesn’t mean they’re hiding or in denial. Simply existing as a queer person is an option too. Cishets do it all the time without being questioned

You’re allowed to be excited about the little things. You’re allowed to be goofy. You’re allowed to be dorky about your favorite tv show, to make blanket forts, to enjoy cheesy movies, even just to sleep with stuffed animals. You’re allowed to do any of the things that make life a little more bearable. It’s fine, ok?

I think it’s beautiful when what you loved doing when you were 6 finds you again when you’re in your 20s or 30s or 40s or 50s or 60s or 70s or 80s or 90s or