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3k626ekful7ozxujar43keiw236in2h

joshpeck

okay but where’s the link

dog: BARK

me (with the same tone and volume): WHAT

paper-mario-wiki

asillyandrandomname

I want my husband to have this accent

imthegirlwhowaited

alright, that’s fine, that’s pretty con-fucking-venient

duckypi

why are old people so obsessed with doing this

pucikat-deactivated20161211

me as a castaway spelling with leaves:

tfw u get stranded😱😱😱😞😞😞😞😞😞😩😩😩😩😩😩😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 succs 👎👎👎👎👎👎👎😾😾😾😾😾😡😡😡😡💩💩💩💩💩cause theres no pokestops 😂😂😂😂😂😂👌👌👌👌👌💯💯💯💯💯😜😜😜😜so whoever sees this 👀👀👀👀👀👈👈👈👈👈👈u know what to do😋😋😋😏😏😏😏😏😛😛😛😛😉😉😉😉💅💅💅💅💅💅

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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iverbz

i sleep nude because if someone ever breaks into my house they gotta fight me while im naked and i dare you to try and swing on a nigga when his dick is out

dipsetflag-deactivated20141026

You are grade A guarenteed to get yourself hurt with this mindset? You think I’m afraid to grab a dick and yank it, bruh? You think I won’t get my hands dirty on your dick in order to end you? You got the wrong one, man—and your ass better hope I don’t have a knife.

iverbz

theseancequeen

Okay weirdly this exact situation has happened to me. It was summer so I was sleeping naked, but then I heard the lock on the front door being opened. I thought someone was breaking into my house and I had enough time to either grab my sword or my nightgown, not both.

Two things I learned.

One, sometimes apartment complexes will flat out forget to tell you they’re sending someone over from the fire department to check your fire extinguishers.

Two, no matter how bad ass a person thinks they are, a naked person swinging a sword at them will knock them off balance both physically and mentally.

However, the fireman was very nice about it and accepted my apology.

stephrc79

didn’t think it could get any better, yet here we are

meanplastic

“24, but go off” LMAOOOOO

nateskyywalker

lionmighty-deactivated20171224

💀💀💀

chocolatechubbybunni

This is me when I’m wrong tbh

ruinedchildhood

pochowek

I dont even need the “binky fucks my mom now” edit the originals are so much funnier

annfosterwriter

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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alwaysbewoke

Terry Crews is literally the best.

hand

when your joke ruins a conversation but you know it was amazing

museum-of-idiots

I have never identified with anyone as much as I do with this man

laffgaff

6 was scared of 7 because 7, 8 ,9 but why did 7 eat 9?

Because you’re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day.

simsimmertim

this is advanced

tastefullyoffensive

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

vampireapologist-archive-deacti

I just drove my uncle and myself to the hardware store, and he said to me “Molly, I want you to know that being Catholic doesn’t change anything. If you someday get married, your wife will be welcome in this family. Don’t ever think otherwise.”

That is really nice, but I am not gay???

vampireapologist-archive-deacti

I’M LAUGHING SO HARD. SPOILER ALERT 2012 ME; YOU’RE SUPER FRICKING GAY.

evolutionofmyjourney

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