barricade brick blog

The Donut Incident

Javert noticed the box the moment he walked into the office.

Which was unfortunate.

Javert noticed everything.

A misplaced document. A crooked picture frame. Someone using the wrong printer. The fact that Courfeyrac had put a tiny Santa hat on the office plant despite nobody asking him to.

So naturally, a box sitting in the center of his desk was impossible to ignore.

He stopped.

The office immediately became quiet.

Too quiet.

Courfeyrac looked at his computer screen.

Jehan suddenly became fascinated by a plant.

Grantaire was chewing something suspiciously.

Javert narrowed his eyes.

"Who left this?"

Nobody answered.

He walked closer.

The box had his name on it.

Javert.

Not "Inspector Javert."

Not "Mr. Javert."

Just his name.

He opened it carefully.

Inside were donuts.

Not just any donuts.

His donuts.

The ones from the bakery across town.

The ones he had mentioned liking once.

Months ago.

He stared.

"...Interesting."

Talking Head — Courfeyrac

"Javert is very good at noticing things."

"Unfortunately, he is terrible at noticing the obvious."

Javert turned around.

"Who knows my preferences?"

Grantaire raised a hand.

"I know you like being miserable."

"That is not a preference."

"Agree to disagree."

Javert ignored him.

Then Valjean stepped out of his office carrying paperwork.

He froze.

Javert looked at him.

"You did this."

Valjean hesitated.

"...Yes."

The entire office went still.

"Why?"

Valjean blinked.

"Because you haven't been eating breakfast."

"I eat breakfast."

"You drink coffee."

"Coffee is a beverage."

"It is not breakfast."

Javert opened his mouth.

Closed it.

He hated when Valjean was right.

Talking Head — Combeferre

"Javert is very logical."

"Very analytical."

"Very intelligent."

A pause.

"He is also currently having a five-minute argument with a man who bought him donuts."

Javert looked back at the box.

"You remembered my order."

Valjean smiled.

"Yes."

"You remembered something I said months ago."

"Yes."

"Why?"

Valjean looked genuinely confused.

"Because you told me."

There was a silence.

A very long silence.

Talking Head — Courfeyrac

"That was the moment."

"The exact moment."

"The moment Javert realized someone was paying attention to him."

A pause.

"Unfortunately, instead of saying thank you, he looked like he was about to arrest the donut."

Javert picked one up.

Everyone watched.

Because this was important.

This was history.

Javert took a bite.

Silence.

"..."

Valjean waited.

"Well?"

Javert swallowed.

"They are acceptable."

The office stared.

Courfeyrac slowly turned to Combeferre.

"Did he just compliment food?"

"Yes."

"Voluntarily?"

"Yes."

"Should we call someone?"

Talking Head — Grantaire

"I have seen things."

"I have seen Enjolras admit he was wrong."

"I have seen Javert smile."

"I have seen Bahorel organize a spreadsheet."

A pause.

"That last one was the scariest."

Javert took another bite.

"They are very good."

The office exploded.

Courfeyrac practically jumped out of his chair.

"HE SAID THEY'RE GOOD."

"They're donuts," Javert said.

"NO, JAVERT, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND."

Talking Head — Valjean

"I don't think donuts are a particularly significant gesture."

A pause.

"I just wanted him to have something nice."

Another pause.

"He works very hard."

He smiles.

"And he forgets to take care of himself."

Javert looked around suspiciously.

"Why is everyone staring?"

Nobody answered.

He picked up the box.

"I am putting these in my office."

Courfeyrac gasped.

"You're hiding them?"

"No."

A pause.

"...I am protecting them."

Everyone exchanged looks.

Talking Head — Courfeyrac

"He bought Javert donuts."

"He remembered Javert's favorite donuts."

"And Javert is guarding them like a dragon guarding treasure."

A pause.

"Which, honestly?"

"Very on brand."

Talking Head — Javert

"The donuts were good."

A pause.

"They were thoughtful."

Another pause.

"I do not know why everyone keeps making this into something else."

The camera zooms out.

Javert is sitting at his desk.

Wearing the scarf Valjean gave him.

Eating the donuts Valjean bought him.

He notices the camera.

Spin the wheel to find out what!

Anyway I don't think Javert is okay-

I got the sound quality fixed it's actually pretty good. Thought I'd share this.

Also here's the cover

instead of a ticket they stamp you with a prisoner number

cart lifting tests like these hammer strength games

Road to Arras Rollercoaster (wheels always break)

Whack-a-Barricade-Boy

Javert-themed water slide

haunted house but it's Cosette's POV getting water from the woods

Tempest in the Skull swing that violently swings you back and forth every time Valjean changes his mind

sewer-themed maze (with slides!)

instead of popcorn they sell that bread-shaped cereal. You may try to steal it, but a guard will follow you around for the rest of the day

there's a hairdresser and you get a reward if you let them cut your hair (they make wigs)

there's also a dentist.

they run a Waterloo reenactment. You can participate (with a water gun)

there's a convent-themed cafe and Musain and Corinthe themed restaurants

for old men specifically, the convent cafe has a gardening section

handkerchief gift shop

small enclosed area for young children to play in-- there are little bridges and stuff mimmicking the pont au change

also les miserarcade

claw machine with dolls

pinball but the balls are bullets and the targets are the amis

They've lost visual on the spider. They will not be letting it get away with this. The White Whale and Jean Valjean are in the clear for a moment.

Oh wait, they found it.

Ahab is going to see if harpoons work on spiders. Javert would arrest it if the law applied to spiders.

:

come or send here. You will ask for Inspector Javert.”

ーVictor Hugo Les Misérables

I've updated the opening of the new episode!

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( credit to @maybeitsapineapple and @viktor-frankenstein for ideas💖)