What do you think, sirs?

Peeno Noir.

Tina Fey keeps her characters in the same universe. 

Top: Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, episode 1x05

Episode 25 of Super Hungry: Conversations with Not-So Starving Artists is HERE! I invited rapper and Hip Hop artist Lady Ace Boogie over to muh basement and she brought along DJ Dean Martian and Orlando James for a full 4 song set and interview. I invited some friends over for an intimate, live experience and it was one of my favorite interviews to date. 

The YouTube 30 min preview is here:

  In the second to last episode of Season 2 of Super Hungry: Conversations with Not-So Starving Artists, Virginia invited Grand Rapids-based rapper and Hip Hop artist Lady Ace Boogie to her basement to perform an intimate set of songs off LAB’s forthcoming album “Don’t Box Me In.” Filled with incredible live performances, poignant conversations about the state of independent music and the current super charged social atmosphere of America, and guest questions from the audience (A Super Hungry the Podcast first!!) – this is one episode you won’t want to miss. [And check out the YouTube video of the episode too!]

If you expect to learn anything about life you’d better first start with knowing how to boil water. Below, you’ll find my easy guide for taking not boiling water and changing it into the hot liquid that people have been using across the globe for centuries.

How to boil water.

Step 1: Pray. There’s no one better suited to help you in this task than our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ of Nazareth, who was and is and is to come. Amen.

Step 2: Get a big fuckin’ pot.

Step 3: Put that shit on a stove.

Step 4: Overcome your deep fear of natural gas.

Step 5: It’s ok.

Step 6: Just turn the knob

Step 7: Wait for the spark to ignite the gas.

Step 8: Wait for it—

Step 9: Oh Jesus Christ.

Step 10: Motherfuck

Step 11: Everything is fine.

Step 12: Shit, we forgot the water. Take that puppy off the flame.

Step 13: Turn off that flame. It is a demon from hell and if turn your back on you it is going to light your kitchen on fire and destroy everything you hold precious.

Step 14: Bring that pot under the sink and fill it up. Not too full. But not too empty either.

Step 15: Put it back on the burner.

Step 16: Go through that fresh hell all over again. Lord Jesus, help.

Step 17: Wait a long time.

Step 18: Pace back and forth in the kitchen.

Step 19: See the little bubbles form on the bottom of the pot. Is this boiling yet? It feels like those little bubbles have been there for a while.

Step 20: Consider putting a lid on the pot to see if that’ll make it boil quicker. But it’s pretty much boiling already. It’s fine. What are you trying to prove?

Step 21: It boils. Finally.

Step 22: Or are those bubbles just a little too small?

Step 23: Think it’s fine.

Step 24: Yeah, it’s probably fine.

There comes a time in every man’s life when he must sell his shoes to buy a papaya for the woman or man he’s truly in love with. And when he buys this papaya, it must be from the fruitstand owned by the man with the biggest mustache. Don’t skimp on mustache size. It’s very important.

Once he has the papaya, he must rake it with his teeth, delicately please! If he does not have teeth, gums will do, but he must be sure to imagine that his gums really are teeth while he’s doing it or it won’t count.

The next step, obviously, is to toss the papaya off of a seven story building for good luck and then rush down to the sidewalk below and take a picture of the smashed fruit on the concrete with a disposable camera. He must take 23 pictures of the smashed papaya and then one picture of a homeless person (which must be developed in black and white).

He must then go to the photo development kiosk at CVS and pay for the 1 hour photo processing but come back thirty minutes later screaming about why his photos aren’t done yet. Impatience and a quick temper are common traits found in the most manly of men, and if a man can’t master these traits, then he’s no man at all. Another manly thing that the man must do is after he’s berated the clerk for taking too long to develop the papaya photos, he must wander the aisles and refuse all help offered to him. A man knows where everything is in the store, given enough time. Accepting help is the first step to not becoming a man. After wandering for the remaining thirty minutes, the man must go back to the counter, pay for the photos, offer a gruff apology, and then ask to take out a money order for a dollar-fifty and mail it to Guns & Ammo magazine. This is because Guns & Ammo is a great publication and they need all the help they can get.

The man must leave the store and get in his car and grasp the steering wheel firmly with both hands whether it’s too hot or not. If it is too hot, the man has permission to utter one curseword of his choice, but nothing over four syllables. The man must drive fast to his true love’s house to deliver the photos of the smashed papayas. The black and white photo of the homeless man is for him, and he must keep it in his glove box for later when he needs to remind himself of the fragility of life and how we’re all walking on a knife’s edge and how his comfortable lifestyle could all be gone in an instant and he could be living on the streets, no one bothering to know his name or shake his hand. He must reflect on this for ten seconds, and then he must grab the axe body spray from his glove compartment and mist himself and the whole of his car — inside and outside, for both things.

Then, of course, when he gets to his true love’s house, he must stand outside the front door, never knocking, never ringing the doorbell, until his true love answers, which could be ten minutes or ten days depending on whether or not his true love is on vacation in Ireland. Once the photos are delivered, the true love will know what they mean and they will sigh and invite him in for dessert.

Planetary Dream Art Prints By Mariano Peccinetti

Peeno Noir.

In episode 23 of Super Hungry: Conversations with Not-So Starving Artists, Virginia went on the road to the Hall of Heroes Comic Con in Elkhart, Indiana to interview the Mads themselves, MST3K legends and movie riffing icons Trace Beaulieu and Frank Conniff!

Virginia and the boys talk about their standup comedy roots; what it’s like riffing movies after all of these years with their live touring show, The Mads Are Back, as well as their own podcast, Movie Sign with The Mads; and Frank has some great advice for up-and-coming comics in today’s new media landscape.

We’ve got movie sign! You don’t wanna miss this!

Don’t forget to follow @SuperHungryPod on Twitter, @SuperHungryPodcast on Instagram, and Super Hungry Podcast on Facebook! 

In episode 22 of Super Hungry: Conversations with Not-So Starving Artists, I got to have a chat with multi-platinum recording artist and pop music star Aaron Carter about his brand-new EP “Love.”

We talk about what it was like for him to be a producer on every track, how his music and fandom has changed over the years, and he gives some incredible advice to artists still grinding waiting for their big break.