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Queer platonic headcanons with the housewardens~~

i made this back in 2024 and hey!! pride month is here so i thought it would be a perfect time to post this.

making this cause I’m aroace myself and would prefer to have this than a romantic relationship.

also…I’m not sure how qprs works? as in, I don’t know how platonic/romantic they are. every qpr is different for each person since it rlly depends on the relationship so if it’s more romantic sounding then platonic for your preference, haha I’m sorry I’m trying. my aro ass can’t discern when smth is platonic or romantic it’s all just clumped together lol.

CW: suuuper fucking long, spoilers for book 6 and 7 (for idia's and malleus' parts), housewardens being a bit ooc? reader is yuu, aroace reader and ofc aroace housewardens, probably inaccurate ways of how qprs come to fruition, im rlly trying okay.

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle finds it hard to open up to people, so it’s very special if you were able to work your relationship this far.

At first, Riddle didn’t understand what aromantism was or even what it meant to be asexual. He was used to the conventional relationship of a man and a woman that he was taught by his mother. It was later that he learned that people could like the same gender by his friends at school. But never did he think someone could be in a deep platonic relationship with another person.

When he met you, he thought nothing of you. His opinion was very neutral. You were known as the prefect who tagged along with Ace and Deuce’s shenanigans, and at first he was ticked off because you were involved with them, but realised that when they got in trouble it was you who was bargaining for the least worst consequence as you acted like the mediator.

For that he was grateful, at least someone was looking out for them. And so he thanked you, offering some tutoring sessions as a token of his gratitude since he knew how you were new to twisted wonderland and probably needed the extra help.

At first the tutoring sessions were purely for educational purposes. Riddle was very professional, teaching you as strictly as possible. If he really wanted to, he could be a wonderful teacher himself. However, when both of you started to relax with one another as these sessions carried on, he started cracking jokes and being kinder when you made mistakes.

He came to realise he really enjoyed your presence. It was relaxing to him, like a cup of freshly brewed tea. You felt like the warmth that encompasses his palms from that same mug. He noticed himself loosening up during these sessions and sighing a breath of relief when he saw you. It was nice.

Your relationship progressed so naturally, the both of you never realised it. It became normal for Riddle to seek you out in the mornings to make sure you looked your best. It became normal for you to give him advice on how to take healthy breaks from work, even reminding him through texts to make sure he was doing so.

You never questioned it, and you weren’t sure you needed to mention it to him. If Riddle was happy with how your friendship had come into fruition, then why would you have to ask him about it? Riddle would tell you straight up if he was uncomfortable with how intimate the nature of your friendship was, and you were confident in that observation.

It was when Ace had outwardly asked about you dating Riddle that you realised that from an outside perspective, the way the two of you acted was very romantic if no one understood the nature of it. Riddle was confused as well as you were, and it was evident both of you needed to talk about it.

“I should have asked you about it,” You had sighed “I didn’t because I trusted you would tell me if you were uncomfortable,” Riddle understood your reasoning and felt happy you understood him that much.

“I was never uncomfortable,” Riddle admitted “It was nice to be that close to someone,”

You then explained that you, yourself, identified as being in the aromantic spectrum. You had to also explain what it was to Riddle, and it was like a switch flicked on in his head, as his eyes lit up and his mouth opened wide in realisation. “I think I am as well,” He had said, and you smiled at that.

And so, you two started labelling your relationship as a queer platonic relationship

Your queer platonic relationship with Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle loves to have tea with you. He’ll include all your favourite biscuits and desserts for when your scheduled tea parties that he has with you. Sometimes close friends such as Trey would attend too. He’ll begrudgingly allow Ace or Deuce to attend once or twice but I think the likelihood of that happening is slim.

He loves to cuddle when he has bad days. If you see him hunching over his desk, ask him to come with you and bring him to bed. He may protest against it, but soon enough he’s cuddling you back and sighing.

You co parent the hedgehogs in Heartsylabyul. He sort of regrets it (not actually) because he realises that ever since you declared yourself their other parent, they’ve become…fatter. He has to tell you to cut down the treats because it’s not healthy for them. He hates it when you give him the puppy eyes in response, but he puts his foot down (very softly).

Your tutor sessions don’t end, but instead of the library where they used to be held, it’s held in the Heartslabyul or Ramshackle dorms. Most often than not it’s held in Ramshackle since Deuce and Ace can’t help but be annoying when you’re trying to concentrate.

If you can bake, he’ll happily try anything you make. If you make something from your world, he feels so delighted to try it out. It makes him so happy.

His mum thinks you two are going to marry. You joked one time to Riddle that you might marry him if it means she’ll shut up about it, and he looked at you pale in the face and said “Please don’t,” he’d rather you not give into her pleas.

Riddle does not want any kids. However, if you want to co parent one kid with him, he’ll oblige. Anymore than one he will not agree to.

Instead you get a bunch of hedgehogs. You become that one cat mad couple but with hedgehogs. You fight when naming them, but end up splitting the hedgehogs in even numbers and naming them yourselves.

Leona Kingscholar

If Riddle is closed off, Leona is like a huge boulder that cannot be pried open whatsoever

I think Leona would know what being aroace is. I feel like he would have researched it when observing his brother’s relationship with his wife. He doesn’t want to marry someone but he wants someone that he could spend his life with. Not entirely a friendship and not entirely a romantic relationship either. So he does know he’s in the aro spectrum.

The only way I could even see Leona opening up to the prefect of the first years, is if you frequently visit the greenhouse

Leona noticed you would visit the greenhouse frequently after you dealt with his overblot, but paid it no mind when you went to sit quietly to study or read.

It became a relief for a certain hyena as he would dump some of his duties onto you, since he knew of the unspoken respect Leona had gained from you after the incident.

Leona found it respectable that you, a magicless nobody, was apart of a plan that managed to fool and out trick him of all people. Because of this he started to…tolerate you. That’s what he called it.

The greenhouse soon became your place of respite and Leona started to see you more and more. After studying, he would watch as you nodded off to sleep, tired after hours of studying. He looks away. He already knows that your neck is going to ache.

One day after a hard few hours of studying, you wring your neck and groan. He laughed to himself since his prediction was right. Your neck indeed had started to hurt. The laugh brought your attention to him, and in annoyance you grumbled to yourself.

He apparently found this amusing, and like it was so obvious, had said that you probably needed a break. A nap even.

And so the tradition of napping together was made. Not together, at least, not immediately. It felt weird not to see and hear you in the background of his naps and it became odd to not hear his snores as a background noise as you rested and studied.

Eventually conversations started and you both found yourselves enjoying the other's presence immensely.

Your relationship progressed very smoothly after that. The two of you didn’t even have to communicate that you two were in a qpr you both just kinda knew from each other’s body language.

When people asked about the nature of your relationship, Leona would just roll his eyes and say it was none of their business. Which was true, it really wasn’t.

He was the type of person to let things be as they are. If people were so worked up about his life that was their problem, not his.

It was when his brother had called, wanting to know how he’s been, did he first confirm the nature of your relationship aloud. Falena had jokingly asked if he was in a relationship yet and you heard Leona say “Yes, im in a qpr. Look it up if you don’t know what it is, I can’t be bothered telling you,”

Your qpr with Leona Kingschoolar

Naps. All the goddamn time. He will find you in the Ramshackle dorm doing god knows what and either fall ontop of your bed or sofa or fall on top of you to sleep. If you’re cooking, he sighs and leans on you, watching you slowly cook.

Sometimes he cooks as well. He learned a thing or two from the Culinary Crucible, and he remembers the basics. Most of his cooking is very meaty tho, so it’ll suck if you’re a vegetarian.

He becomes more motivated to do things in your presence which Ruggie praises the gods for. Practically begs you to join him everywhere so that Leona actually gives a rat’s ass to do whatever he’s doing.

Don’t expect him to be a good study buddy. He will fall asleep and will only answer your questions in snarky and sarcastic answers. It drives you nuts.

No one is bugging you while he’s around, if they even try it he’s glaring at them and tugging your arm to go somewhere else.

Falena is so happy his brother has someone now! He still doesn’t understand the concept of qprs, bless his heart, so he does ask about marriage now and again. Leona tells him right up “No. Never,” he is alright with what he has now.

Cheka loves you. He climbs you like a monkey and asks you all sorts of questions; it’s sort of endearing. Leona always has these minuscule moments when he sees you playing with Cheka that he’ll think “maybe adopting a kid won’t be so bad,” but then Cheka would look at him, annoy him instead, and promptly think “Why did I think that,”

As you may have guessed, no kids. None at all. Even if you give him the biggest eyes ever he will not succumb.

Will maybe accept pets though, and will help with them now and again. But only one or two.

Azul Ashengrotto

In my eyes, I think Azul would see romantic relationships as unnecessary for him. He has no interest in them whatsoever, and only has big dreams in his mind and he spreads his energy evenly across those dreams.

Azul is as predictable as a robot. Everyone and anyone can guess what’s on his mind. Business ventures, possibilities to exploit, people to take advantage of. It has drawn people to him while simultaneously driven people away. So to be close to him is as easy as it is hard.

After your shenanigans in Octanaville, he wanted nothing to do with you, which made the already huge distance between him and you even worse.

The embarrassment, the humiliation you put him through created a cold and seething loathing at the pit of his stomach

So when you asked for help during Chapter 4, oh boy did he eat. that. up.

Here is the Prefect, the ringleader of the First Years that so dared to take away his prized possessions, begging on their knees for him to save them from Kalim’s supposed torture. Oh how rich this was.

And what an opportunity! To have two people reliant on him! You and Jamil! Oh how wonderful of an opportunity this was

So of course he agreed with a smug eating grin and saved you from the utter demise you were under.

However, it just so happens that when the two of you were stuck in the bedrooms like you were some criminals, it gave way to some of the most honest and genuine conversations he ever had with someone. ever.

It must have been how late it was. Or maybe how brutally warm it got at night that messed with his brain, he had asked “Why would you do it, why couldn't you turn a blind eye,”

You gave him a knowing smile, a kind one that did not mock him. You answered him so sincerely…how could he not get all sentimental.

It was embarrsing really, how easily he can cry. It was the blasted heat that made him so stupidly emotional that day.

It must be nice to have friends you cared about so much that you would risk your autonomy for them. Azul couldn’t relate.

And that thought struck him, the one thing he wasn’t able to make into reality.

A dream, he supposed. One he didn't think he'd want.

After the whole ordeal with Scarabia, Azul found himself seeking your attention. He was curious, wanted to know more about how you thinked.

He would give the excuse that an outsider's opinions of the Mostro Lounge was important! Someone that wasn’t from Twisted Wonderland surely would have a perfect opinion on how to improve it. Although, they were very silly, like what colour napkins should he buy this time. They made you stifle a laugh sometimes. Don’t let Azul see, or he’ll abandon his attempts entirely.

This evolved into actual conversations other than the Mostro Lounge, and soon enough he found you hanging around him as casually as you would with Deuce or Ace.

He would be signing papers in his office while you would be in the office too, finishing some homework you almost completed in class. Then after he would ask if you’d like a cold drink due to the incoming hot summers which seemed unbearable already. You would happily say yes, so the two of you would end up sitting in the Mostro Lounge, drinking some lemonade or something like that.

It blew Azul’s mind that this friendship came to fruition, and from being stuck in a bedroom of all things.

One day the twins asked “How is your relationship with the Prefect coming along?” Which prompted Azul’s reply of “Whatever do you mean?”

All he ever wanted with you was a friendship, not a romantic one. He feels like now is not the time for one abd doesn't even think there would be a time. He has the Mostro Lounge to worry about, contracts that need filling out. A romantic relationship would be too much to handle, in his eyes.

A friendship, however, that was just right. And he was putting all his extra energy into the one he had with you. It was the last thing he wanted after all.

He confronted you, gave you the facts and opinions of the people who came forward to him (which was only Jade and Floyd) and asked “Do you like me in the way they described?” He accidentally came off too strong but the prospect of the person he opened up to wanting a relationship with him was waaaay too daunting.

You blurted out a “Oh gods no,” too fast to process and proceeded to laugh embarrassingly at that. Azul stared confused, about to yell at you for laughing at him, but you were already explaining why you responded the way you did.

“I’m aromantic,” you said “I can’t experience romantic feelings even if I tried,” and then you explained what aromantic was.

It took him a while, but he put a hand to his chin to think “The description of being aromantic also aligns with my own experiences,” he says “Hmm…,” he was already planning on researching into it further.

It doesn’t take long for him to research all about this new identity. He looks up all the different labels underneath the umbrella, and promptly stops when the labels become too many and he gets a headache trying to figure out which one he is. In the end, he just settled with the umbrella term of aromantic.

He also finds out what queer platonic relationships are, and finds them interesting. How exciting, a relationship that fits all his boxes of what he wants.

He gets a bit nervous to ask you if you would like to be in one with him, so he invites you to the Mostro Longue to talk. There, he gives you your favourite drink on the menu and asks you very softly. And you say you would be delighted to.

Your queer platonic relationship with Azul Ashengrotto

He doesn’t expect to give in to a lot of things you want, but he does. It boggles some people’s minds, including his.

50% off of everything! Just for you.

You better not abuse it, though, cause Azul might have a headache if you keep buying out the entire restaurant

Drinks and snacks are free if you’re studying, however. It’s to bait you into studying more lol.

What you don’t know is that he has been making these treats himself. Maybe one day he’ll tell you.

He helps you with all your homework and studying. Draws graphs and explains everything super thoroughly. He’s the only reason you're passing everything other than magic.

If you ask to see his secret coin collections, he will gape and nod. How did he not think of this before! He can’t believe he hasn’t shown you his precious collection before.

Shows you each coin and meticulously tells you every detail of every coin in such precision that you’re very impressed. He’s so passionate about his coins.

If you used to collect things back in your world and if you tell him, he’ll go quiet and the next day you may find the item at your front door. A very pretty one at that.

He’s not used to walking on land, even if it’s been a few years since he’s been on the surface. So he sometimes gets wobbly on his feet and may need help to stand up. When this happens, you softly tell him to take a break and relax, and he does, although you have to quickly bring him somewhere no one can see him. He’s self conscious with people seeing him being weak. You sit there and wait until he’s fit enough to get back up, and he subtly leans on you for support as he goes back to his office. You promptly try and get him a very nice cane to use.

You still sit with him in his office as he works. He finds your presence comforting. You don’t have to be doing anything, just stay right there and keep him company.

He refuses to hug, even if he would want to. You can see by how his fingers fidget. So you'll need to take the initiative.

When you’re particularly tired after a gruelling school day, you obnoxiously stretch your arms and fall onto Azul’s shoulder. He'll ask what you're doing before you say "Trying to give you a hug," and he'll begrudgingly oblige.

He's not comfortable with hugging for a long time. Maybe in the future he will.

Sometimes, when he’s very stressed, he will ask for you to stay the night in his room to keep him company. Most of the time you play chess with him to take his mind off of whatever's bothering him.

When you meet Azul’s mother, suddenly it makes sense why Azul opened a restaurant in NRC. His mother is a fantastic cook, and keeps on feeding you delicacy after delicacy. Now it makes sense why Azul seems to keep you fed so much.

I don't see Azul really wanting to co parent kids. He may agree to co parent one or two kids if you really wanted to. He may not be home a lot due to his work, but he will make up for it with the trinkets and wonders he brings home from his business trips.

No pets though. I think he’d get more frustrated with animals than with kids. Kids are more predictable in Azul’s eyes than animals. He can actually tell what the kids will want, all animals will do his make loud noises that will make his ears burn.

Kalim Al Asim

I feel like Kalim is the type of aro who doesn’t understand the typical boundaries of friends and partners so he claims he loves everyone the same.

You never interacted with Kalim before the events of book three. During that time, you had become acquainted, and it seemed that in Kalim’s mind acquainted means friends. It’s the typical extrovert adopts the introvert scenario, and before you know it, he’s clinging to you like a koala does to a tree. Due to your lack of friends, you accepted his sudden appearance in your life.

It was whiplash, having a few by your side occasionally to having Kalim there nearly all the time. Sure, you had Ace and Deuce, also Epel and Jack, however they did not hover over you all the time and had their own hobbies and things to do. You were so used to being alone that having someone there was a big change.

Because of this, sometimes you would run out of things to say, and you would become quiet. He never found your silence as rude and didn’t mind it. He made any awkward silences into stories of folklore from his country and shenanigans he got into when he was young (which mostly consisted of stories of how he got kidnapped. You listened in horror). You and Jamil would be silently listening to him as he rambled about anything between everything and nothing.

You learned very quickly that Kalim can go from 0-100 really quick. Even if you didn’t know him that well at this point, he would give you gifts every time you meet up much to Jamil’s dismay.

In turn you cook for him. It was the least you could do. Jamil at first was weary but soon reluctantly stopped being too cautious when all of your food seemed good to eat. You made extra for him to eat too so he wouldn’t feel too left out.

Kalim was very nice to you which was very shocking compared to the rest of the school. It was hard to get used to, but eventually, you were smiling at Kalim as kindly as he did to you without the fear that he’d backstab you like some students in the school.

Soon enough Kalim wouldn’t leave your side, it was like he was stuck to your hip. And you welcomed it and expected it, indulging yourself with his hugs and with his arms that rested on your shoulders. Sometimes, you even noticed him playing with your hands which you would end up doing the same with him. It would gain a happy giggle and a squeeze in the form of a hug. This was really nice, you always found yourself thinking.

Ace and Deuce asked if something was up and you replied “No? Why?” in which they both raised a brow at that.

One day Kalim tells you that his parents want to talk to you over the phone. “They told me they can’t wait to meet you, and I can wait for them to meet my best friend as well!”

And with that you’re looking over to Jamil for help because you have no idea what the fuck is happening.

“Kalim has been describing you to his family like you’re, to the average person, dating. Please just…talk to him,” Jamil sighs and rubs his eyes. Poor guy.

That was when you had a big discussion with Kalim. It was hard to make Kalim understand that, no, most people don’t want to spend their entire lives with their best friend and platonically cuddle, raise kids and adopt three camels.

“There might be a type of relationship that can suit us though,” you mentioned “if you really do want to spend your life with me…like that,”

Kalim enthusiastically nodded at that, which is how your qpr started.

Your qpr with Kalim Al Asim

Loves to spoil you. At first you feel bad that you don’t have anything to reciprocate his affections other than food, but he reassures you that you being there for him was enough. He’s such a sweet guy.

He takes you on rides on his magic carpet all the time. Whenever you’re feeling bad, he appears at your bedroom window and knocks softly, taking you away into the sky to forget about your troubles.

But if a carpet ride won’t help make you feel better, he will guide you into the bed and cuddle you while you tell him your woes. He’s actually very good at listening despite how carefree he may seem, and promises to help you with whatever is bothering you.

Jamil and you become somewhat friends too. You know he’s not doing it because of Kalim because, well, his facade was blown wide open. So that’s nice?? You think. You hope.

When you do finally meet his family, you keep up the facade that you really were dating, only because you and Kalim have no idea what would happen if you admitted you weren’t. You meet all of his siblings, and they ask a lot of questions that you have no idea if you answered convincingly enough (they all related to how you and Kalim got together).

If Kalim ever blurted out anything, Jamil graciously covered for him. Thank god.

You have sleepovers at Scarabia a lot, since Kalim is so touchy feely that he needs to hug or at least hold your clothes at all times. Grim doesn’t complain, free food!

He tries to teach you to dance which he succeeds somewhat. He giggles if you can’t get a move right and helps you slowly so you can get the hang of it.

He loves holding hands. He will grab your hand and squeeze it like a stress ball. He does the same with your arm as well. At this point you might as well be a fidget toy for him from how much he squeezes you and plays with your fingers/hands.

Kalim would LOVE to co-parent kids with you! There is the issue of the heir to the Asim family, but that conversation is so far out in the future that you and Kalim haven’t given it a thought. But Kalim would definitely want to co parent a kid with you.

Vil Schoenheit

I don’t think Vil would have ever thought that he would be aromantic. It just never crossed his mind. He’s a very busy guy, so he hadn’t had time for any crushes or feelings to get in the way of his work. Or so he thought. In reality he was aromantic and didn’t care for romance really.

Vil is easy to get close to if he sees a person that holds great promises. There’s no stopping him from making sure they reach their true potential.

That’s what Vil saw in book 5 when he got to know you better. He saw a person hindered by their circumstances and environment. A blossom that was planted into gravel and which succumbed to its unfortunate fate.

Vil shall not allow such a thing if he can help it. And he can! He has the money, the resources, and the patience to make it happen. And so he does.

He approaches you first, asking if you would be willing to be brought under his wing. Since he has made amends with what he had done, you oblige at first due to the opportunities it could provide.

On the outside, he seems nagging and doting. He’s enrolling you in lessons, giving you pointers and tips. It looks like he hasn’t changed.

But on the inside, it’s a different story. He’s genuinely determined to see you flourish into the you he knows you can be. He’s soft with his touches, encouraging with his words, but doesn’t shy away from telling you your flaws as he sweetens it with ways to improve. He treats you like an equal and not someone who’s beneath him.

On your side, you were delighted for the attention. Your physical health was hitting an all time low because of how little money you had from the allowance Crowley gave you. It was barely enough to buy yourself the necessities. With Vil’s help, now you could buy more than necessities. You were able to take care of yourself and Grim properly, and even better, become the better you that you wanted to be. You’re able to try things you never thought you’d be able to do. Ballet was one of them, and Vil indulged your requests for other things such as painting.

When book 6 happens, he’s genuinely overjoyed to see just how much you’ve improved in real time. He sees that your movements are more graceful, more precise. You’re more able to dodge attacks and keep out of harm's way from the ballet he enrolled you in.

He sees that you’re reaching your potential finally, but even now he doesn’t loosen his grip. He feels closer to you somehow. You weren’t a fledgling bird trying to find its way in the world anymore, you were becoming a beautiful and graceful swan.

He instead invites you to more mundane activities, like indulging him by accompanying him to some tea or asking if he could practise makeup on your face. You happily agree to these small invites. It made you happy, you felt like he wasn’t your mentor now, but more so a friend.

Wherever he went in school, you were sure to be near. Since you got so close with Vil, you also become good friends with Rook. Let’s be honest, the two are a package deal.

It got so frequent to see you two together, that people thought you were dating. When Vil heard of the rumours he himself laughed and sighed, before coming to you to speak to you about them.

“Honestly, people will gossip about anything,” he has said, lips pursed with an incoming sigh. You hummed in agreement, before speaking.

“I suppose it’s confusing to some people,” you laughed “Friends aren’t typically as close as we are,” you genuinely meant that as a joke, however Vil started thinking of your friendship more. He compared it to his friendship with Rook and found contradictions. Rook was undeniably his best friend, the one who’s closest to him. He certainly did not let him get away with holding his hand or even convincing Vil to eat more cake.

The confusion on his face made you a bit worried. You asked what was wrong, and it took him some time to put his thoughts into words

“For some reason, my friendship with you feels…different,” he confesses “I’ve thought about it and there’s no denying that I treat you differently to my other friends. I confess that I pondered if it was romantic feelings that I was experiencing, but even that doesn’t describe it. It doesn’t feel right,”

“Hmm…maybe I can help,” It was then that you described what it was to be aromantic, and Vil’s mind seemed to soften and relax as you described it.

He smiled and nodded “Ah…I think that may be the word that I’ve been searching for,”

It was then that you confessed that you were, in fact, aromantic while also mentioning that you preferred qprs more than romantic ones.

After a few days of more pondering, Vil had asked to meet you for tea, and asked if you’d like to be in a qpr with him. And of course you said yes.

Your qpr with Vil Schoenheit

Oh he loves to pamper you. He does your nails, your makeup, dresses you in the most beautiful clothes that he can find.

You tell him what sort of fashion you liked when back in your world and he’s scouring fashion magazines and the internet to try and find equivalents. He wants you to be able to express yourself and feel like yourself once again.

When you have a bad day, he encourages you to have a spa day with him. No words are spoken when he brushes your hair and massages your head.

You love to pamper him too! In your own way. You convince him to indulge in some desserts. You bake small sweets for him to eat. He blames you if he gains weight, but no matter, if it’s from your affection it will be fine.

You also ask if you could do his makeup, and he accepts. Even when you don’t have a lot of knowledge, he obliges, only giving you advice when it is truly dire. “Are you sure?” He would say, looking up at you with an eyebrow turned up. It is your decision if you heed his warning or not. If you ignore him three times, he huffs and takes the makeup and gives you a (lecture) lesson on how to properly apply it.

When you do apply it right, he’s beaming happily at your work. “Not bad for your first time,” he muses, looking at himself in the mirror, before looking up at you from his place on his seat. His satisfied look makes you feel very happy with your handiwork.

He gives back the favour as well and does your makeup. No words are uttered as he applies the makeup to your skin, and you soak up the moment.

He loves your cooking, but please cook healthy meals. He wants to keep his skin healthy after all.

He likes to go with you to the beach at sundown. He believes it’s one of the most beautiful times of day. He watches as you take pictures with that ghost camera Crowley gave you before watching the sun turn into the moon.

He’ll indulge you if you want to co parent a kid or two. He’s a bit against it, only because he doesn’t want paparazzi to make him adopt a kid with another person, a big story. Especially when the majority of people don’t understand how qpr works.

Idia Shroud

In my mind, Idia had known he was aromantic for a looooong time. He lives on the internet and probably came across the term when he was very young and it just fit him. The older he became, no more sure he was that he identified as it. Because of that, he doesn’t have a big identity crisis over not romantically liking anyone lmao and doesn’t feel like he’s missing out.

But goddamn. How did you even become friends with him let alone get into a qpr with him?

I'm serious.

For that reason, the only way I see you even interacting with Idia is through Ortho. And for that reason too is why Idia’s is going to be so fucking long.

Ortho was on a mission. To help his big brother get friends! He had data on everyone in the school…except the prefect in Ramshackle.

He had flown to your dorm room, and made up a reason to be there. Maybe something to do with being curious about your world. It was an excellent question! By learning about your world, you’re bound to tell him about your interests.

You were very surprised. You knew nothing about the Housewarden of Ignihyde at this point, and had no knowledge of him having a brother. But you indulged his curiosity since it felt nice to talk about your world, despite the fact it also made you sad.

Surprisingly enough, he finds that back in your world, you used to play a lot of gacha games! You talked about the different sort of games you would play, and how you had built up such good teams to fight the enemies. He’s hit the jackpot, he thinks to himself.

Ortho gets to know you more as well. He asks to go out more, and Idia is very confused and suspicious as to why his brother wanted to go out so much. When Ortho tells him it’s because he’s been talking with the Prefect of Ramshackle, he mumbles to himself and continues his game while telling Ortho to go on ahead.

Eventually, Ortho tries very hard to make his brother open up to you. He tries to make it subtle, but Idia knows instantly that something is up. Since he can’t convince Idia to be friends with you…maybe he can convince you.

Ortho(begs) asks you if you’d like to join the board game club, and hopes you’d intrigue Idia enough for him to talk to you. He gives you reasons such as the games they play are so fun! They play chess and ludo, you’d definitely love it. You absentmindedly tell him that it would be better if they also played D&D and quickly dodge questions Ortho asks about what D&D is. In the end, you agree. It would be fun to play games with others.

When Idia sees you for the first time in the board game club, his jaw drops and he knows this is Ortho’s doing. Even so, he doesn’t let your presence sour his gaming time.

Eventually Idia is forced to play chess with you since you were the last person he hasn’t played against. And reluctantly, he agrees to a match of chess. He’s also curious, he wonders if what Ortho said about you being good at games were true.

The match against you was one of the best he had in a while. You were a tough opponent, and in the end you had won. You grinned triumphantly, saying “Checkmate,”. Eyes wide and in shock, he congratulated you for good sportsmanship.

Since then, he always seeks you out to play chess when inside the club. He enjoys playing against you far too much. He asks how you do it and you shrug your shoulders “I’m not sure I just know what to do,” he gets slightly scared of you after that, calling you “mega op,”

As Ortho notices that Idia was playing more with you, he absentmindedly mentions how you used to play gacha games in your world and he watched how Idia’s whole world crumbles and rebuilds itself again.

“Why would you tell me that,” he says softly in horror, not because he was angry at Ortho, but because he knows what’s going to happen. And Ortho just giggles because Idia has fallen into his trap.

Idia locks onto that one fact. His body itches to ask you to play with him, since some of his games require a large party of players, and admittedly he gets too angry with other players he doesn’t know other than Muscle Red.

Fuck. He needs to itch the scratch.

“Ortho tells me you played gacha games,” he blurted out once when you were playing another game of chess.

You blink at the mention of gacha games and you nod twice “Yeaaaah, I was addicted to them,” you say “Too bad I don’t have a computer,”

Idia winces at the mention of a computer. That’s true…you didn’t have shit. Did you even have electricity? Idia was desperate for someone to play with however, it would make completing certain games soooo much easier. Like way much easier. Some of the new bosses needed a party of over three people. Three was the minimum. Idia was the type of person that got angry with other players easily, so he and Muscle Red weren’t able to get the new items for the new cool weapons and level up items for new characters as well.

It also helped that you were very approachable and chilled out. You didn’t scare him and you didn’t seem like a normie either. He’s sure Gloomurai would like you too.

“If I give you my old pc…,” he said too quickly for even him to process “Would you help me and my friend with some games?”

Your hand that was about to place a chess piece to a different square stops in its place before placing the little knight in its new spot. This was…a lot for an acquaintance. Even with the deal, did Idia really have a whole pc to just give away???

“Um…sure??” You said hesitantly. You would have never thought Idia of all people would have gave away a pc to you. You’re so confused at that point. Why was he being so nice…suspicious.

When he goes home, Idia groans and tugs at his hair at how disgustingly nice he sounded to you. UGH. HOW CRINGE. HES GOING TO GIVE A FREE PC WITH NO CHARGE. he wants to kms right at that spot at that minute.

When he does give you the pc, he helps set it up and is horrified at your ‘desk’. It was literally a mouldy dresser. So he also gifts you a gaming chair and desk. He doesn’t want his new gaming buddy to have horrible equipment that would wreck the pc faster.

When you boot up the game and add Idia, he tells you his friend’s user and you add him too. He introduces you to Muscle Red and he comments that he’s happy that Idia made a new friend and that it was heartwarming. Idia promptly tells him to be quiet and “it’s not like I like them I just asked them to join us cuz of the new bosses,”

Lol. What a loser /j

This is when you got a lot closer. If Idia thought you were a good chess player, he’s now even more impressed. You’re an amazing gamer too. He wonders if you’re just good at all games cause you get a hang of his games way too fast. It makes him even more intimidated...too op.

He finds himself asking to play with you even when it wasn’t to defeat the new bosses. That progressed to playing games that resembled Super Smash Bros, wondering who could beat who. He found it so fun and thrilling, and for once he wasn’t relying on mere luck. He was analysing your play style, making theories with how to utilise your weaknesses. It was just so much fun. You were so much fun.

You were an amazing person to play with, and he finds himself seeking your company other than for games. He would text you “hey im bored what r u doing?” And you would take a horrible picture of what you were doing at that moment. One picture was a blurry pic of riddle and ace since you were in a study group, another a blurry pic of a tree since you were reading a book under it, and another a zoomed up picture of your head and he had to guess what on earth you were doing in that one.

If on the very rare chance that he calls you, you would tell him what you were doing. He experienced school life through your words which was as close enough as he wanted.

No one understands how you managed to get so close with Idia, and even Idia is perplexed with it. If anyone asks, which is very unlikely and most likely is one of the other housewardens, he would say something like “They aren’t a normie like you,”

The relationship pretty much strengthens at this point. There’s never a telltale sign when the qpr relationship starts because Idia is way too awkward to bring up that question and you’re content with how things progressed.

One day, when it was late and you were still playing video games with Idia, your sleep deprived state led you to mention that you were aroace. Idia, surprised at the sharing of identity, also shared that he too was aroace. It made you take the extra mile and ask him a question.

“There’s a special relationship called a queer platonic relationship. They aren’t explicitly romantic or platonic, they're just…in the middle,” you mumbled. He’s silent as you continue “If you would like…I think it describes our friendship a lot…so…,”

“I wouldn’t mind,” he mumbled back “I- uh…I was thinking about it too but I thought it was cringe to ask,” he says quickly.

Your qpr with Idia Shroud

You force Idia outside /j

Okay you don’t, you encourage him and he reluctantly complies. He secretly appreciates it as well because he experiences things that resemble cafe scenes, beach scenes etc that he’d see in anime.

He tells you that of course, and if that’s how he wills himself outside, then you’re happy if pretending to be in an anime helps him calm down when going outside with you.

Of course, sometimes his anxiety gets too much, and when that happens you don’t dare to beg him outside. That would be rude. Instead, you video call and show him around where you are. It’s like steaming but with only him watching. He feels special when you do it for him lol.

You give him trinkets from where you go, even if it’s just on sage island. If you go to an ice cream place, you make sure to get bubblegum ice cream since it reminds you of his hair. He then calls you cringe for doing so but finds it nice lol.

He invites you over to his place to play games. He lets you play on his older consoles and shows off his skills. You’re genuinely impressed, not even you could do most of the things he could do. So you stubbornly try to defeat the secret and hardest levels that he did.

You watch anime with him and he nerds out about them. You sit and happily listen to him as the anime rolls in the background. You manage to understand what he’s saying and also manage to watch the anime. How you do it you have no idea.

Embarrassingly so you pick up on Idia’s speech mannerisms. When Ace or Deuce do something stupid, you blurt out “That was majorly cringe,” and now they’re laughing at you and you’re burning from embarrassment. Idia thinks it’s funny when you complain to him, and all he does is laugh at your misery.

You have a new brother, no question about it. You adopt Ortho which makes him confused but accept it nonetheless. You make his brother happy so he’ll go with the flow.

Before book 6, he wasn’t sentient, and wasn’t able to fully appreciate the care you had put into both him and Idia. He had sought you out due to his programming with no feelings attached. However, after Idia’s overblot when he gained sentience and his own soul, he got to see you again. He tears up and gives you a big hug. “I’m sorry,” he says, even when the overblot wasn’t entirely his fault. But then you realise he wasn’t apologising for that “I never realised how much you gave to me and big brother…thank you,”

That’s when you started truly acting like a sibling to Ortho. And in turn he was able to fully appreciate it and thank you.

You spoil Ortho more than you do Idia. He’s just too cute! You love giving him small toys that any person would buy their little siblings. Idia is majorly concerned about your budgeting because how are you affording that with the allowance Crowley gives you??

Idia starts to eat better when you’re around, since you bring over leftovers from your dorm. He still does eat the occasional instant ramen but it’s nowhere near the amount he used to eat.

You manage to convince him to join a D&D server, or at least the Twisted Wonderland equivalent. He ends up thoroughly enjoying it surprisingly enough.

He gives your phone upgrades when he’s bored. Now you can take the most detailed pictures ever and your phone has so much storage it’s insane. He’s very proud of his handiwork.

He doesn’t want to have kids at all. Too much hassle, he thinks. He may need a successor to his name, however, but he says that he’ll train an apprentice in the future.

Malleus Draconia

This is…hard for me to think about. To me Malleus is one of those aroace people who never get it and never will even if you try and explain it. Ever since the beginning of your friendship, he’s been so touchy feely with you that it slipped into a qpr so effortlessly none of you really thought about it. It’s hard to think of hcs from what happened before your qpr with Malleus because…it kind of always was?

I see it in a way that after his first interaction with you, his curiosity of you was highly piqued. His visits became more and more frequent, and he found himself seeking your attention.

You found yourself fond of Malleus, or as Hornton as you knew him at this point, and seeked his attention too. He was different from your other friends that you made. He was more knowledgeable than anyone you met yet so unknowledgeable at the same time. He made you laugh at his antics, and even if he didn’t understand what you were laughing at, he would laugh too. Your happiness was enough to make him happy too.

Both of you wanted to know more about the other, and Malleus thought that after knowing everything about you that this infatuation would end. Instead, his head told him “No. they are to stay,” and so he stayed by your side ever since.

When someone asks him “What are you, dating?” Malleus lifts and eyebrow and shakes his head.

“No. They are my dearest friend is all,” and that’s all the confirmation you needed.

Your qpr with Malleus Draconia

Your relationship was never official and honestly it never had to be. If someone was brave enough to nag Malleus for an answer of if he was dating you or not, he would growl lowly and say something like “You insolent fool, they are my most trusted confidant, stop wasting my time with your nonsense,” which does not answer their question at all lmao

Malleus doesn’t feel the need to label his relationship with you. Wasn’t being with you enough? It was for you. However some people wouldn’t be happy with it.

To be frank, the Senate would not be happy with the arrangement, but they didn’t have to know, right? Lilia knows everything that goes on in Malleus’ life whether he likes it or not, and he may or may not have decided to keep your close relationship a secret. For now.

For now, you and Malleus enjoy the sweet bliss of being together before the future forces you to come to terms with your position.

He takes joy in eating your food. At first, he tells you that you don’t need to waste such unnecessary energy to cook and that he can create luxuries with just a snap of his finger. But you had told him that home cooked meals just “hit different” whatever that was supposed to mean. So he started eating your cooking and It’s certainly better than Lilia’s cooking that’s for sure. It wasn’t just better, it was delicious. If he finds you cooking when he pops in for a visit via teleportation, he asks “Precious child of man, whatever are you cooking?” And at your answer he licks his lips and feels his stomach growl. It makes you laugh.

Sometimes you find small golden trinkets on your bed. Bracelets, earrings, necklaces, even anklets. The sudden appearances could only mean that Malleus had gotten them for you. To entertain him, and because they were genuinely very pretty, you had started wearing them. And everytime Malleus’ eyes gazed upon your jewellery, a giddy smile appeared on his face.

He had given you an emerald once and you gawked at it before returning it to Malleus. He pouted at you but obliged, giving you emerald earrings instead. You can’t win lol.

He likes taking strolls with you. In the forest, at the beach, anywhere that you go he'll follow. It's an excellent way to have a leisurely chat, even if the subject is as simple as "Nice weather we're having today,"

His favourite time to have strolls, however, is at midnight. When the night's air is crisp and when you can hear the creatures of the night scurrying in a bustle...he finds in peaceful.

Malleus is filled to the brim with knowledge and stories pertaining to a lifetime ago, so in the darkness of the night when he visits Ramshackle is when he waits at your window in order to talk with you. Of course you oblige, such outings is when Malleus feels no stares nor people trembling in his presence. He can just talk.

He loves stargazing as well. He brings a telescope just so you can see the stars as clearly as he can.

However, your relationship got strained after book 7. You hadn’t known how deep Malleus’ loneliness ran, and a part of you felt so bad for him. However, another part of you was angry, angry that he did not accept your wishes to go home despite you asking and telling him. His reaction to put you into a deep sleep so he could keep you here had hurt you.

You had a long talk with him, confessed a lot of things to him too. “It was not right, what you had done,” you had said, trying to pick out your words carefully.

“My dearest companion,” he had mumbled “Forgive me. I’m very selfish,”

Indeed, a dragon’s instinct is to hoard everything and everyone he loves. He must not let anyone he keeps close escape his clutches. Fighting these urges was like fighting himself. And Malleus is a stubborn man.

Hearing him calling himself selfish struck a chord in yourself “I’m so sorry Malleus,” you said “I didn’t want to be someone you may have to lose someday. I’m afraid you’ll have to learn to hold close the memories and moments you have with your loved ones. It’s a lesson you must unfortunately learn,”

He took those words to heart, and made sure that the small moments you had with him were grand and momentous. He holds parties in your name even though no one knows who you were. He brings you to far away lands when there are term breaks so you can experience the most of Twisted Wonderland.

Maybe you will go tomorrow. Maybe you will never go. Either way, Malleus wants fo make the most of the time he has with you.

A/N hiii, I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I liked writing this! I’m sorry if this was too ooc or not accurate for whatever reason, I really did try! I also don’t know how I managed to write less for my faves than the ones I don’t know that well. how did that happen.

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