𝑺𝑶𝑵 𝑶𝑭 𝑻𝑯𝑶𝑹𝑵𝑺.

        heart stills within your chest and it feels as if every ounce of your body tightens at once, restricting your air and rooting you into the place that you stand. everything comes full circle the second you hear that voice ---- the voice you had yearned to hear again without even realizing. everything hits you at once ---- the shadow market, her reluctantly by your side each and every time you needed her, her saving your life. all of the times she had made you feel geniune happiness in the midst of the chaos, and then vanished. no calls. no texts. just gone. it’s a clash of emotions that you can’t handle and you almost stumble backwards, hands shaking at your sides. “hope?” 

   it should be easier to breathe. it should, because she’s just lifted a weight of your shoulders that had weighed you down since the age of twelve. it was no longer just your burden to bear and you should feel grateful, but there’s something that nuzzles itself into your core and makes it all feel wrong. what else is there for you if not this institute, those kids that you call your siblings but know that they’re so much more than just that? you’ve raised them all, protected them, kept them safe. helen is your sister, but she’s been gone for so long. too long. too many what ifs cross your mind and they all make you feel guilty for letting them pass through your mind. it isn’t her fault that she didn’t get to see them grow up, or learn all of their likes and dislikes. it’s the clave’s, and her standing her is enough to make you feel as if all of your petitions to get her back hadn’t been for nothing. that’s what you have to focus on as you hold onto her, swallowing down the lump that forms in your throat and the uneasiness that clutches at your chest. “don’t ever apologize for any of that, helen.” spoken firmly and your jaw tenses, a flash of anger toward the clave shooting throughout you. you pull back from her, let your eyes meet with her own. “it isn’t your fault that they wouldn’t let you come back with us. none of it is your fault.” 

brand   new   starter   call   (   lengths   &   verses   will   vary   )

       piercing   sea   -   green   eyes   are   fixated   onto   the   girl   that   stands   before   you   ,   distance   and   personal   space   damned   for   the   sake   of   a   blade   to   your   throat   .   breathing   has   always   been   difficult   when   it   came   to   emma   and   being   in   her   proximity   ,   but   this   was   now   for   new   reasons   entirely   .    she   was   emma   ,   but   she   wasn’t   yours   .   she   was   colder   and   the   look   in   her   eyes   told   you   that   there   wasn’t   much   left   of   the   person   she   used   to   be   .   a   hollow   shell   that   mirrored   your   emma   .   head   tilts   upward   in   the   slightest   and   your   jaw   tenses   ,   stomaching   the   image   that   surfaces   from   her   words   to   remain   looking   into   her   dark   eyes   .   “   i   don’t   know   ,   this   is   a    pretty   compromising   situation   too   .   “    eyes   shift   toward   the   cool   weapon   against   your   throat   before   they’re   back   on   her   .   “   i   don’t   want   anything   .   not   from   you   ,   at   least   .   i    just   want   to   get   back   to   my   world   .   “