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@panathenea

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lmao hello so much happened in this time... imagine opening tumblr to see my age listed as 19 and realizing im 23 now
And y’all don’t wanna hear this but aceness (having lived through it and connected with other people about it believe me I am not talking out of my ass) more than any other identity like this has a LOT of cases where it’s born out of conditions. It has a lot to do with being in a society where sexuality is expected. It has a lot to do with internalized homophobia. It has a lot to do with dysphoria. It has a lot to do with performative heteronormativity being shunned. It has a lot to do with sexual rejection. It has a lot to do with interpersonal anxiety. And those are all very valid. But because aceness is obsessive about inclusion-as-proof-of-existence (you know, the existence of that community y’all defend so much but also claim you don’t have?), ace discourse also circles around telling people they don’t need to question the source of their feelings, they don’t need to think about the how’s and why’s of their identity. And like, that’s not fucking healthy. I’m sure there are plenty of people who are just ace because they’re ace. But there are also a lot of people who are traumatized by this traumatic and inflexible society we live in, and while I’m not saying you’re not ace, I am saying figuring out if there’s an identifiable why might make your life so much better. Because there are so many instances of people who have complicated feelings on love and sex and thus are averse stumbling onto MOGAI tumblr and going ah! Someone gets me! But later finding out that there was a reason, and confronting that reason, and leaving the label behind. Me included. I was aro AND ace, or believed I was for a time, because it seemed to explain a lot of my feelings on the concepts. But I’ve learned different. So in a way I’m glad that the community became so vile that I turned my back on it. Sometimes I think about that guy that was like “I’m dating women but I don’t want sex with them, I’m ace but for some reason I’m attracted to men but I could never see myself dating one” and it’s like.. that’s textbook internalized homophobia and performative heteronormativity. And this is what I mean when I say it’s dangerous that the Ace community is so allergic to any critique of its methods of gaining ‘members’ or his rhetoric. Because it’s actively trapping people in a state of non-growth. You won’t stop being valid if you find out there’s a reason you’re averse to romance or sex. You’re not a ‘fake’ aro/ace person if there’s a reason you identify that way.
And that’s the tea on that.
Good post op. It’s important to question. After 7 years of iding as aroace, I’m now figuring out I’m a lesbian with super complicated feelings around intimacy and romance thanks to a slew of social things. Don’t wait as long as I did to atleast ask why!
I could have easily stayed in the closet as a trans lesbian if I didn’t keep persistently asking myself why I was so repulsed by any kind of intimate contact. Good post OP.
Op i understand what you’re saying but at the same time… it ain’t that deep. I don’t sit down and ask lesbians WHY they are lesbians, like can you fucking imagine? “Have you thought about why you are a lesbian? You might just be straight and traumatized towards men. Have you spent a lot of time thinking about sex wth men? Are you sure you don’t want it secretly deep down?” That’s nasty and directing it at aces is no less so.
That and the fact that you called the community vile, thanks a lot, and seem to think that asexuality is defined by not wanting or repulsion towards sex…. bad fucking post, op. It’s not the fault of aces that society confuses people about their identities, and our welcoming people in doesn’t make us some form of evil recruiters. Try again.
Ace-angel you are EXACTLY why the ace community is vile. Tons of us have shared literally our own personal experiences of how we identified as ace due to mental illness, trauma, internalized homophobia and dysphoria. I’m fucking one of those people. This is EXACTLY why your community hurts people, because you think asexuality is comparable to being lesbian or gay or trans or bi. Its fucking not. Life is more complex and just because something is true in regard to being gay doesn’t mean it works the same way for asexuality. Its a false equivilency.
Asexuality is about amount of attraction, and not necessarly about who you are attracted to. And amount of attraction is SO easily impacted (whereas who you are attracted to is more innate and those “causes” of being a lesbian have little evidence to support them ever happening). Age, stage of life, your current situation, mental illness, trauma, hell even what part of your menstrual cycle you’re on can all impact amount of sexual attraction.
Y'all don’t want to fucking admit that its not always fucking “society’s” fault that aces feel alone and alienated. Its not always because society judges you, its because you see other people out there minding their own damn business and falling in love, and you’re fucking jealous and lonely. I’m not speaking as an outsider making fun of y'all, I’m speaking as someone who has LIVED THIS and still lives it. You see others connecting, falling in love, having sex, and you feel left out and alone and scared because you don’t know how to do that, because you’ve never felt that way about somebody else before. For a lot of us thats because of depression, anxiety, dysphoria, internalized homophobia and just general difficulty understanding socializing.
Its not fucking wrong as an ace person to WANT to feel attraction to somebody. Its not wrong to analyze why you feel the way you do, to consider if maybe you’re not just naturally ace for no reason but if maybe something is holding you back, and that doesn’t mean you’re “invalidating” yourself or that you’re invalidating asexuality as a thing.
Ofc its stepping boundaries if you like, question somebody else’s asexuality, bc thats their buisness and identity, not yours, but the ace community has a toxic environment of “Its probably not because of x, y, z, and even if it is you are Valid UwU and you’re still ace.”
You looking at this post and going “No, don’t talk about causes of asexuality thats nasty” is what holds people back from recovery and realizing their full identity.
Didn’t I tell y'all? Aces try and position Aceness as an LGBT identity to keep any discussion of self-exploring its source from happening. But the fact of the matter is that Aceness is NOT like being a Lesbian, there is no lateral Ace experience and it is absolutely good and healthy for people experiencing intimacy aversion to question why. People in the tags and me in this post and other people on this post are all sharing our ACTUAL experience with how the label of being Ace impaired self-exploration and healing, and they’re not happy for us. They’re just fucking upset that we’re questioning. The Ace community/groupthink is SO vile.
I hope no one lowkey hates me. Highkey hate me. Hate me with every fiber of your being. Go big or go home

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“if somebody becomes panicked when you accuse them of lying theyre obviously not telling the truth” shut up ugly im a survivor who got punished for shit i never did all the time of fucking course im gonna panic when im blamed for something i didnt do
since this post is actually getting attention rn i really want to emphasize this-
many of the “tells” of lying are traits commonly found in abuse survivors and mentally ill/disabled people.
stuttering, averting eye contact, panicking, raising your volume, fidgeting, and other similar traits are actions performed commonly by these groups, especially in situations of heavy stress- such as being accused of doing something we didnt do, especially if we are afraid of being punished for doing nothing.
im honestly begging people to think critically when accusing somebody of lying for small traits like these.
wallpapers with films by makoto shinkai ♡♡♡ please do not reupload (lighter version)
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@itskanon
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aishoku: Kimi no Na wa (2016) || Makoto Shinkai
@ jacob yeah!! Its ok to reblog!!!!
Quit talking abt me like im not fucking stupid
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An economy that bases prices in scarcity will have a perverse incentive to deplete any resource. This is how capitalism functions. It is not only economically sound, but economically profitable to generate crisis. For example, look at the crops that get burned due to over-abundance, look at how diamonds are price gouged, look at how clothing is liquidated because of overstocking. It is disgusting. We destroy our excess in order to make profit. Not donate, destroy. The compassionate route is blocked off by greed. We have enough housing, clothing, and food to keep our entire society off the streets and fed, yet because we worship the dollar over morality, we prefer to allow and encourage suffering.
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