Grandmas were so right about puzzles and knitting and crocheting and solitaire and reading slow and slippers and baking and watching deer in the backyard send post

Johnny is NOT stupid because he doesn’t know what a dinosaur is. In the 1890s American education wasn’t standardized and dinosaurs and evolution theory wouldn’t have been taught at most schools in the Bible Belt, which Kentucky is a part of. But he IS a dropout / delinquent. I beg of you do not confuse his issues with authority with being less intelligent

I think people underestimate his intelligence. Sure, he’s not booksmart like Gyro, but he’s consistently really analytical. I feel like he’s more often the one paying attention to their surroundings and making deductions about them. Plus, remember how in the beginning of the story, he was the one concerned about how far away they were from the next waterhole, and Gyro couldn't even read the map properly? And he’s usually the one thinking about where they’re gonna go next? And somehow he just knows all the information about the other racers at the top of his head, whereas Gyro always has to ask him about it? And during Sugar Mountain, he was the one being like "wait a fucking second Gyro because there’s obviously something else going on here"? Lol. They're both smart, just in different ways.

I was a part of the russian sleep experiment but I was in the control group so none of that stuff happened to me

Could never get a dick piercing. What if I get near a strong magnet and it rips my thang asunder