Red vs. Blue starters (Volume 2)
I am not your mother, so don’t come tattling to me every time one of you does something that the other one doesn’t like.
I’m telling you, he’s crazy. He keeps threatening me, and talking in a scary voice.
Is this gonna be one of those things where I have to turn my head and cough?
Aren’t you here to join our squad?
I think you need to come up with a new plan. Preferably one that involves me keeping the same quantity of blood that I have right now.
I don’t have a gun, I am a pacifist.
There is no way this bluff is gonna work.
You’re surrendering! You don’t get anything except humiliation and ridicule!
I would just like to let everyone know, that I suck.
Water? We ran outta water six months ago.
I only drink the blood of my enemies. And occasionally a strawberry Yoohoo.
Oh man, that is a burn. Dude, you just got burned. Burned, dude, burned.
Sorry man, but it’s pretty obvious that you’re really unpopular, and if I’m gonna make any progress around here at all I can’t really be directly associated with you. I’m sure you understand.
All I hear is that voice, you know, telling us to kill all our friends before they have a chance to kill us.
Help, the jeep is kidnapping me!
How ‘bout we just don’t take any more prisoners, since we seem to suck at it.
What a way to go. Killed by my own mechanical creations. I’m sure there’s a philosophical lesson to be learned from all this.
I know that you said a lot of things that you didn’t mean. People say crazy stuff when they’re faced with their own mortality.
What? You can’t fight a machine gun!
What in the hell is going on at this base?
What? You’re not just gonna leave me out here in the middle of nowhere… by myself?
What’s going on? Are they there? Did they leave? Hey, somebody tell me what’s happening!
Listen, ___, you’re not fooling anybody with that innocent victim routine.
Your soul is a cavern of lies!
You have such excellent motor skills.
Buenos dias, cockbites. Guess who’s back.
There’s a very fine line between not listening, and not caring. I like to think that I walk that line every day of my life.
Are we going on a trip? I love trips! Can we play I Spy? And the License Plate Game?
I ain’t got all day. I gotta gut this fish.
Oh I see. You have no idea what I should do or how I should do it, but whatever I do I should do it fast.
Hey, the box is there for a reason. I like thinking inside of it. I feel safe in there.
Do you have any food? I love to eat all the food.
So after I clipped my toenails, I was gonna apply the ointment as recommended, but I don’t know - it just smelled really funny. So, I decided to taste it, just to make sure it was safe.
Well old buddy, it looks like this is the end for us. Since we’re gonna die anyway, there’s only one thing left for us to do.
I don’t seem to have any memory of you. My name is ___. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
It’ll be a cold day in hell before I take orders from you.
I got half a mind to kill you, and the other half agrees.
I don’t know, it looks like some kinda alien artifact. Do the aliens have, like, a home base or something here?
Don’t try to move too much, you’ve been through quite the ordeal.
I do not like to dream. I try not to think while I’m sleeping.
I think you’re kind of obsessed with being my best friend.
Don’t tell me they cancelled the holiday party again. Those cheap bastards.
Come back to me! I made you a muffin!
How about this time we try something that doesn’t involve me being shot at or run over.
Look we can’t just sabotage their equipment, that’s rude.
Hello? Who’s there? Please help me! I’m scared of myself!
You wanna braid each other’s hair?
Shut up you idiot, we’re not here to fight. We’re here to negotiate.
Are we gonna have a sleepover? Because that would be sweet.
Did you just shoot yourself in the foot?
I think this is what they call the calm before the storm.
Oops! Sorry about that big explosion!
I think it would be ironic, if everyone was made of iron.
I just had a really weird feeling that I’m never gonna see this place again.