esther

Shadow milk art I made entirely from memory

I know they’re shitty but I can’t bring myself to make something new and interesting just for a bit of attention. Its hard to finish art pieces these days but i don’t really mind it cause doodles take less time and i can make more of them.

can i vent a bit?? yes?

ok.

uhh stop reading now if you don’t wanna listen to me being emo!!!

Honestly the world has felt exhausting lately. Brushing my teeth feels like a chore and i haven’t done it in probably a good month or two. I can’t finish an art piece and it feels like my progress is at standby. Been like it for maybe a year now. My mental health has been constantly going up down down up do up up down down down and I don’t know when it’s gonna stay in one place. I would rather either be at a really low point or doing super well. And honestly i think im returning to the lowest point in my life again. I’ve relapsed 2 days ago after being 10 days clean and im a bit disappointed in myself cause of that. And on the topic of relapse i never feel like my sh is valid. They never leave scars and barely bleed. It’s better than nothing though i guess.

I’m ashamed that the only thing helping me through these times is a DARKSHIP. A fucking father x son ship..

sigh. Anyways this probably gonna be my last post for a good while. I wanna focus more on me for now. My mental health and identity specifically. Umm

Yah

So anyone that cares i hope you’re doing well and yeah!!! :3