Idk what to do with myself anymore, my emotions have been so heightened and all over the place. I know a lot of it has to do with grief but I've really been going through it lately, man.
Everything was going so well with the guy I've been talking to at work, so much so that I decided to tell him that I like him and just wanted to see how he felt and whether the feeling was mutual or not. I couldn't even get a direct answer from him, just that he didn't wanna commit to people and that he thinks I'm really cool and hopes we can still hang.
That's fine, he doesn't have to like me as anything more than a friend, and I still want to be his friend because I've wanted to for like a year now and I do think he's cool and I've had fun hanging out with him. This week has just been so weird after that and my stupid brain keeps trying to convince me that maybe he doesn't want to be my friend even though he hasn't said anything to suggest otherwise. It doesn't help that he hasn't even read the text I sent him three days ago and he has yet to accept my friend request on Facebook despite being online.
Like I just wanna be friends at the very least and be able to hang and text and stuff and it's been so hard to make plans with him and he sucks at texting on top of it, which doesn't help. And because I have no other distractions, no one else to hang with or talk to, my days off from work have just been unbearable and I keep having dumb little emotional breakdowns.
It really sucks right now and I have no idea how in the world to make myself feel better.
