CHYMICAL WEDDING

Bi women are kinda expected to just not be with men if they have like. Common sense or something. You see it everywhere. Victim blaming attitudes towards bi women with men from within the bi community usually along the lines of “if she hadn’t been with a man that wouldn’t have happened”

And a recent examoke is the anon I got the other day saying (to what degree of seriousness who knows lol) sleeping with men makes u a class traitor.

So anyways these attitudes can force bi women to choose between community and a relationship that can serve in some cases where the man is abusive to further isolate bi women.

And I’ve seen some people say welll ok if they’re with men then why don’t they go to str8 resources. And it’s like ok. Well for one they aren’t straight that should be enough but let’s go a bit further. Bi women experience unique types of abuse at the intersection of misogyny and biphobia and connected to misconceptions about bisexuals in general. They are also more vulnerable to abuse than straight women because again - they face abuse unique to bi women.

some say the solution is for bi women to just. Not date men. Especially when a bi woman dares criticize or express anger towards men. Which literally isn’t possible for some who for example may live where they can’t be out as a bisexual, where there isn’t much of an lgbt community. And umm sometimes you just fall in love with a man because that’s the whole thing with bisexuality lol.

A lot of people have pointed out (rightfully) in the notes that the twitter thread has advice on how to steer your life away from fawning and into some stronger healthy friendships. I want to amplify that message again. When I said to read the full thread if this resonates w/ you, I really meant it…it has ideas you can put into action like the below! I just didn’t want to create a post w/ like 36 screenshots 😅 here’s the link again loves.

I had surgery Thursday* and so many people just simply remembered it and texted me nice little things and well wishes and it meant the world to me and I wanna be that for others more. I’m pretty good w/ checking in on close friend/family stuff, but it’s often late, and I can be better for them. My only obstacle is not recalling when someone needs a check in like that bc I’m caught up in my own daily shit. But I’m a very scheduled person and I do great with task lists sooooooo for special stuff for special people I’m going to calendar when they tell me something like “I have a big presentation at work coming up Friday” or “my mom is going for chemo Monday” or whatever! Thought I’d share my idea!

1. Hang clothes out to dry inside or outside your home

2. Use cloth napkins that are washable/reusable

3. Make sure your home is properly insulated - this’ll be cheaper in the long run too

4. Buy rechargeable batteries

5. Always reuse plastic bags, don’t buy new ones, invest in cloth bags/tote bags/reusable bags

6. Reduce the physical mail you get - ask for emails instead

7. Use matches rather than plastic lighters

8. Buy cotton swabs with paper rather than plastic

9. Buy plants for your house or garden

10. Go to the library or buy second-hand books from charity shops, online etc.

11. Donate things on Facebook, freecycle etc - someone else might need your junk

12. Buy biodegradable dog poo bags

13. Avoid beef and lamb for yourself and your pets - it’s the worst meat for the environment

14. Buy biodegradable baby wipes

15. Try meat-free days, try good vegan alternatives or even go vegetarian (hit me up for tips and recommendations)

16. Decline plastic straws in restaurants or bring your own reusable ones

17. Buy a reusable travel mug - places like Costa and Starbucks give you money off if you bring your own mug!

18. Donate old towels, blankets, bedding etc to dog/cat shelters

19. Buy local produce when available

20. Buy coffee and chocolate that says it protects the rainforests e.g. Fairtrade

21. Switch the plugs off at the wall before you leave the house/while you’re asleep

22. Take your phone to a recycling centre when you get a new one

23. When at ATMs or self-checkouts, don’t print your receipts or ask for them to be emailed instead

24. Turn off your car while waiting to pick someone up

25. Use sites like FreeRice.com and Ecosia to plant trees and donate rice to the hungry

26. Grow your own food - it’s cheaper

27. Eat less meat and dairy!

28. Take shorter showers

29. Use leftover water to water your plants - like the strained water from cooking vegetables

30. Turn off the lights when you’re not in the room

31. Buy energy-efficient bulbs

32. Turn off the tap while you’re brushing your teeth

33. Take public transportation, car share, walk or cycle

34. Recycle - can’t believe I have to say that one

35. Try composting

36. Go to charity-shops, second-hand stores, thrift stores or whatever they’re called - use Depop, Ebay etc. and buy second-hand

37. Donate and sell on rather than throwing away

38. Freeze food before it goes bad - fruit, veg, bread etc. and leftovers

39. Get a reusable water bottle - stop buying plastic bottles

Seriously though, I drive a minivan. It gets decent gas mileage. But if one rich person takes a round trip flight from New York to London and back, that single act would produce more atmospheric warming than if I stopped driving my car for an entire year.

None of the above outside number 40 will make a single bit of difference to the climate or our planet. None. Do these things because they’re good habits to get into since we’re all going to need to live like that in the next decade. But do not believe for even one second that they are saving the planet.

There is nothing easy anyone can do anymore to help “save the earth”. If we want to stop killing our species and destroying the biosphere we have to put in the hours.

And voting isnt enough. Voting can actually be part of the problem if you dont understand who do vote for. And if you say “VOTE DEMOCRAT” then you are one of the people who doesnt understand and the first step you can take to being helpful is to learn more about politics and climate breakdown. Because Obama set us back on climate progress and if you dont see how or if you think thats unfair then you, by definition, are not informed enough to advocate effectively around politics.

And that’s okay! This is a process. But it will not be little lifestyle changes that help save anyone or anything. The simple truth is that the time where that wouldve made a difference has passed and now the only way to stop the apocalypse is to hydrate, fortify, and get ready to put your back into it.

Or dont. You dont have to be someone who does anything about this. No one is going to be guilted or bullied into doing anything of value and if the idea of reading books by Bill McKibben or Naomi Klein and getting involved with radical grassroots organizing sounds like too much, that’s fine, theres plenty else that needs doing. But knowing this, the least you can going forward is break the cycle of selling people the snake oil of lifestyle politics as climate solution.