s’chn t’gai spock written by aj
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on hiatus as of 10/16/22
we're not kids anymore.

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@otherwiise
s’chn t’gai spock written by aj
rules | doc | hub
on hiatus as of 10/16/22

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@auroradicit “You don’t have to please everyone.”
Spock is tense, hands clasped behind his back. “I am sure that I do not,” he says. “However, I also prefer not to make a point of displeasing as many people as possible, as seems to be the intention of you and... your partner.”
one day i’m going to have to go all the way down the rabbit hole about what happens in the alternate timeline in a quality of mercy if spock is either dead or seriously injured
like... goodness a lot would change. looking at romulus... would someone else be successful saving romulus? and even if they aren’t the kelvin timeline probably doesn’t exist... and politically there’d be a lot that went down a different route on romulus without spock there a;dslkfj
i saw a review that said a quality of mercy reinforces jim as “the great man” of the star trek universe and i’m like... actually, no? i don’t know how i feel about everything they did, but they were definitely reinforcing spock as most important guy in the universe.
@moonshadowed “You deserve to feel safe. And happy.”
Spock raises an eyebrow. He knows how Captain Pike likely intended the words. It’s the sort of thing his mother might say. And perhaps he should simply accept the intention.
However, that isn’t really his nature.
“I appreciate that Humans consider happiness a positive thing, but to me it is no different than sadness or anger or any other emotion; it fluctuates and misleads because it is not based in logic.” He pauses, then adds, “As for safety, there are many places that are safer than the Enterprise, but I would not chose to be anywhere else.”
things i keep telling myself … sentence starters
“You’re enough.”
“It’s okay to rest.”
“You’re safe, now.”
“You’re not a burden.”
“It’s okay to be scared.”
“You’re doing your best.”
“Don’t listen to the doubt.”
“It’s not better to be alone.”
“They can’t hurt you anymore.”
“It’s okay to cry if you need to.”
“You do not deserve to be hurt.”
“You don’t need to forgive them.”
“It’s okay if your best isn’t perfect.”
“It’s okay to take time for yourself.”
“You don’t have to please everyone.”
“You were just a kid. It wasn’t your fault.”
“You’re not a bad person for speaking up.”
“You don’t have to push yourself so hard.”
“Healing takes time. There’s no time-limit.”
“You’re surrounded by people who love you.”
“You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone.”
“You don’t have to do everything by yourself.”
“It’s not selfish to ask for help when you need it.”
“You deserve to smile, and laugh, and be happy.”
“You don’t have to apologize for taking up space.”
“You don’t need to justify your existence to anyone.”
“You’re not stupid for not understanding something.”
“Everything might not be perfect, but it will be better.”
“You can miss someone and still realize they hurt you.”
“You’ve come so far, so take a second and appreciate that.”
“Not everyone is out there to break you down and hurt you.”
“What was done to you was not your fault. It never, ever was.”
“You don’t need to accept apologies from people who don’t mean them.”
“You’re allowed to tell people. If they didn’t want people to know, they shouldn’t have done it.”
“They didn’t love you. It hurts to recognize that. But, it means you can move on, and find someone who does.”
“Healing isn’t linear. You’re going to have days you feel like you’re doing worse, and that’s okay. They’ll pass.”

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apologies … sentence starters
“I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“I’ll try to do better, I swear.”
“You deserve better than this.”
“I’m sorry you went through that.”
“I’m sorry you have to deal with me.”
“I was wrong. I should have listened.”
“I know I messed up. And I said I was sorry.”
“Was I… was I the reason you were crying?”
“I just lost control. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”
“You shouldn’t have had to deal with that, I’m sorry.”
“I shouldn’t have done that. Can you ever forgive me?”
“They’ll never apologize, so I’ll do it for them. I’m sorry.”
“I’ve never stopped and listened to you, and I’m sorry for that.”
“Oh my god, am I… am I the one who made you cry? I’m sorry.”
“I’m not going to ask for your forgiveness, because I don’t deserve it.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt you, but that’s not the point. I still did. And I’m sorry.”
for those who’ve been hurt … sentence starters
tw: victim-blaming / dismissing hurt. change pronouns / wording as needed
“You deserved better.”
“You’ve lost a lot, haven’t you?”
“I mean, you hurt them a lot, too.”
“I won’t hurt you the way they did.”
“You deserve to feel safe. And happy.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being wary.”
“You never shouldn’t been treated that way.”
“They aren’t here. they can’t hurt you, again.”
“How long are you going to let this affect you?”
“I know you don’t trust me, yet, and that’s okay.”
“I’m sorry. I want to earn your trust back. Please.”
“No, I’m not upset with you, why would you — oh.”
“You’ve been through a lot. It’s okay. We’ll take it slow.”
“Why can’t you just get over it? It happened so long ago.”
“You haven’t said a word since it happened. Are you okay?”
“You’re still healing. It’s only natural you don’t trust anyone, yet.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell someone what you were going through?”
“What happened to you was unfair… it’s okay to be angry about it.”
“Do you think you’ll ever be able to forgive them for what they did?”
“You’re a better person than they ever were, and this just proves it.”
“If you ever want to talk about it, you know I’ll always be here to listen.”
“You’re safe here. I know it’ll take you a while to believe it, but you are.”
“Just because they hurt you doesn’t mean everyone else is out to get you, too.”
“I know you’ve been hurt in the past, and I promise, I’ll never let that happen, again.”
“Cry. Scream. Break something if you need to. Just… you need to process this somehow.”
this episode was the second pilot and so they didnt have all the details down yet, but this line is still so funny to me. “one of my ancestors” you mean your dad, spock? your father?? your father, who married your mother???
“You can relax, Mr. Spock. This isn’t an official session.” He’s shown no actual signs of distress, of course, but she feels compelled to reassurance anyway. “It’s simply a way for me to introduce myself to the crew, let you all know of my services, and gauge who might be interested. I promise not to take up too much of your time. Would you care for some tea?” She gestures to the selection laid out on the coffee table—a Vulcan spice tea among a variety of earth and interplanetary blends, though she does not think to assume his tastes.
@otherwiise — call.
While the inclusion of a Vulcan option is noted, Spock still doesn’t feel entirely comfortable with the Human tendency to pair drink or food with conversation, despite Captain Pike’s many attempts to convince him to enjoy it.
“No, thank you,” he says tersely. “If you intended to simply make me aware of your services, I assure you that, although it is technically not one of my duties, I make myself familiar with anyone who comes aboard the ship. I also believe your services will be of better use elsewhere.”

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nursc:
the famous human mother. ever since the revelation of his half brother, the son of a princess, christine’s curiosity had been piqued about his family had been piqued. truth be told, everything about him made her mind go into overdrive, but that’s neither here nor there, all that matters is providing him support right now. “ all mothers worry about their children, our love lives, our decisions. it’s their job, it doesn’t mean we have to always listen to them. ” unless….
“ did she… do you share her concerns? ”
It’s a very subtle movement; Spock pulls back his shoulders a fraction of a fraction of a centimeter before he stops himself. There is a sudden tension in his neck and between his shoulder blades, which he recognizes might be... misinterpreted if she were to notice.
“Regardless of whether I share her concerns, I believe my mother is not someone who worries without reason.” He furrows his brow slightly. He can’t deny that his mother often spoke with him about his personal life, or at least attempted to, but he’s not sure it’s worry, exactly. Despite being Human, she has an impressive control over her emotions. “She is perhaps protective. I believe I was a... challenging child.”
“ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 ” 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒.
a wonderfully patient and creative nonnie asked for a list of prompts based on interactions between two good friends in the aftermath of a trauma that happens to one of them, and i’m nothing if not a sucker for angst and deeply emotional connections! so here we go! i’m hoping these will be up to the nonnie’s expectations! have a wonderful day, my lovelies, and DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST !!
“ i really hate seeing you like this… “
“ why don’t we hang out tonight? like we used to, you know? order in cheap take-out, watch crappy movies, go for a walk… whatever you want, right? “
“ please say something… anything. even if it’s telling me to shut up and leave you alone… just say something. “
“ i really miss you, you know. “
“ i’m here. you got that? i don’t care if you never say anything to me ever again. i don’t care. i’m not going away, and i’m not going to stop being here for you, no matter how long you glare at me or ignore me or pretend that you’re okay. because i know you’re not. i know. “
“ talk to me. i don’t care what we talk about. it doesn’t have to be anything big. we don’t need to talk about whatever happened to you, not unless you want to. i just… just talk to me, will you? “
“ you know, i talk to a lot of people every single day. i hear all their voices telling me all kinds of stuff; i hear it all. and the only voice i really wanna listen to is yours, you know? even when you’re driving me crazy. so come on. please… just drive me crazy again? “
“ …seriously? no come-back? no witty retort? no… sarcastic shot at me? come on, i… i know we never ask these things, but, honestly, i’m worried about you. what’s going on? “
“ penny for your thoughts? hell. a dollar? ten? fifty? my whole life-savings? damn, at this rate i’d give away everything i own just to hear your voice again. “
“ this is like, the ninth voicemail i’ve left, and i know you hate voicemails, so i’m thinking this might be the one that pisses you off enough to pick up the phone and talk to me. because despite the number of times i’ve told you to shut up, i’m actually begging you to say something, now. weird how things work out, isn’t it? anyway. pick up your freaking phone, moron. please. “
“ will you please talk to me? please? “
“ i have exhausted every single topic that i can think of to get you to open your mouth and say something to me. all of them. you leave me no choice… how are you? “
“ listen, we’re all really worried about you. okay? and we wanna help you, but we don’t know how. so how about you write us a note, or something? maybe just, open the door, huh? i just wanna know that you’re okay. “
“ you’re not alone, you know. you’ve got people who love you. who care about you. you’ve got me. and i’m not going anywhere. “
“ look, i don’t know what happened to you. and i don’t need you to tell me, okay? i don’t… i just want you to know that i’m here. i got you. no matter what. and if you need some space, then… then i can leave. just tell me what you need, okay? “
“ i don’t need you to say anything. you don’t even need to open the door. i’m just gonna slide this paper under the door, okay? you tell me what you want for dinner, and i’ll bring it up. “
“ i’m sending you on a list of therapists and group support meetings in the area, okay? you don’t have to go, but… promise me you’ll take a look at the list, right? “
“ listen, i know you gave me a copy of your key for emergencies, and this feels like an emergency, but… if the silent treatment is part of you trying to get some space, then i don’t wanna intrude. you know? so just text me if that’s what this is, and i’ll leave you alone. “
“ i know, i know. you asked me to leave you alone. but that was two weeks ago, okay? and i haven’t heard from you. you aren’t answering my texts, you aren’t even reading them. nobody’s seen or heard from you, and… and now i just want to know that you’re okay. so please, open your door, and let me make sure that you’re safe, will you? “
I’m going to archive some of my Spock threads from earlier in SNW’s run, because my interpretation of him shifted as the series went on. If we have a thread from back then, I’d be happy to write a new starter for you! I just can’t continue threads where Spock isn’t how I see him now.
@captainkxrk: “You can’t keep secrets from everyone and expect them to trust you.”
"A logical conclusion,” Spock says after a moment of consideration. “However, I do not consider it a sound one. To keep a secret is merely to withhold information, it is not outright dishonesty. There is no reason to believe someone will not be trustworthy simply because one has chosen not to share everything of themselves.”
Then, he raises an eyebrow, “Am I to take it that you do not have any secrets, Lieutenant, or are you by your own analysis untrustworthy?”
I understand that, uh, Vulcans have a strong, hidden primal nature.

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spock is very busy!
argumentative, confrontational dialogue … sentence starters
“Just open up. For once.”
“Oh my god, just grow up!”
“Don’t tell me to calm down!”
“Stop it, you’re being childish!”
“I told you I’m fine, stop asking.”
“Shut up! Shut up! Just shut up!”
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Don’t you owe me an explanation?”
“Why don’t you ever listen to anyone?”
“I’m so tired of listening to you lie, lie lie!”
“Stop, I don’t want to argue. Just let it go.”
“Stop talking down to me. I’ve had enough.”
“Why are you sneaking around here like that?”
“What made you think that any of this was ok?”
“Why… why would you say something like that?”
“Don’t tell me you’re happy. I can see you’re not.”
“You’ve got a lot of explaining to do. Start talking.”
“You’re not perfect! Stop pretending that you are!”
“Why does everything have to be a fight with you?”
“Have you ever told the truth about anything, ever?”
“Talk to me. That’s all I want. Just talk to me, please!”
“Just keep your mouth shut for one second. Just one.”
“Why are you acting like this? What’s gotten into you?”
“You expect me to believe you? After all you’ve done?”
“Can’t you just give it to me straight, for once in your life?”
“Tell me what’s been going on. I deserve that much from you.”
“Why are you always trying to stick your nose in my business?”
“You can’t keep secrets from everyone and expect them to trust you.”
“Something’s up with you, and I’m not letting you go until you tell me what it is.”