OrderedChaosThings2

⟢ "You ever get tired of being strong? Because I'm tired. I'm really, really tired."

⟢ "It's late and I can't sleep and I keep thinking about every version of my life where things went differently."

⟢ "I'm fine. I've just been fine for so long that I forgot what actually good feels like."

⟢ "Nobody checked on me today. I don't know why that hit so hard tonight."

⟢ "I think I've been disappearing slowly and nobody noticed and I'm not even sure I minded."

⟢ "Can you just stay on the phone? You don't have to say anything. I just don't want to be alone with my brain right now."

⟢ "I cried in the car again. That's my third time this week. I'm fine though."

⟢ "I keep telling myself I'll feel better when. And the when keeps moving."

⟢ "Some nights I just need someone to ask how I actually am. Not the how are you that expects fine back."

⟢ "I'm not sad about anything specific. It's more like everything at once, all the time, very quietly."

⟢ "I forgot to eat again. Not on purpose. I just got lost somewhere inside my own head and the day disappeared."

⟢ "I don't want to talk about it. I just want to sit next to someone who knows something's wrong."

⟢ "Do you ever feel like you're performing being okay and you've been doing it so long you've forgotten what the real thing looks like?"

⟢ "I'm homesick for something I can't name. A feeling, maybe. A time. I don't know."

⟢ "I put on a brave face so automatically now I don't even notice I'm doing it."

⟢ "Some days I miss people who are still alive. That's the loneliest kind of missing."

⟢ "I think I've been grieving something for years without knowing what it is."

⟢ "I'm not looking for advice. I just need someone to say yeah, that's hard. That's genuinely hard."

⟢ "I keep waiting for the version of my life that feels like mine."

⟢ "There are people in my life who love me and I still feel completely alone and I don't know what to do with that."

⟢ "I think I've been running on empty so long I forgot what full felt like."

⟢ "Tell me it gets better and mean it. Don't just say it. Mean it."

⟢ "I had a dream it was okay. All of it. And waking up was the hardest thing I've done in a while."

⟢ "I just need one day where nothing is required of me. Not one single thing."

⟢ "I smiled all day and now I'm home and I don't have the energy to even pretend anymore."

⟢ "I think I've been trying to outrun something that's been inside me the whole time."

⟢ "The silence is different at night. Heavier. Like it has something to say."

⟢ "I'm not drowning. It's more like treading water for so long my arms are giving out."

⟢ "I wish I could explain it. It's not one thing. It's every small thing, stacked."

⟢ "I keep meaning to call you. It's been six months. I keep meaning to."

⟢ "I'm tired of being the one who holds it together. Just once I want someone to hold it together for me."

⟢ "Everything is technically fine. That's the most honest answer I have right now."

⟢ "I dissociated through most of today. Came back around 9pm. Don't really know where I went."

⟢ "I get this feeling sometimes like I'm watching my own life through glass."

⟢ "I think the loneliness has just become part of my personality at this point."

⟢ "I made tea and sat in the dark for an hour. I'm okay. I think I'm okay."

⟢ "I don't need someone to save me. I just need someone to notice I need saving."

⟢ "There's a sadness in me that doesn't have an origin story. It's just always been there."

⟢ "I keep apologizing for taking up space and I don't know when I started doing that."

⟢ "I cried at a song today and I couldn't even tell you why. It just opened something up."

⟢ "I'm starting to think being understood is the rarest thing in the world."

⟢ "I've been so busy surviving I haven't had time to figure out if I'm actually living."

⟢ "I'm okay when I'm around people. It's the coming home to quiet that gets me."

⟢ "I think what I actually need is just for someone to look at me and get it without me having to explain."

⟢ "I almost reached out to you last night. Almost. Old habits."

⟢ "I don't know who I am outside of who I am for other people. That thought keeps me up."

⟢ "It's not depression. It's more like everything is slightly grey and slightly muffled. All the time."

⟢ "I forgot what it feels like to look forward to something."

⟢ "Some people make the world feel smaller and safer just by existing in it. I miss having one of those people."

⟢ "I'm not angry at anyone. I'm just carrying so much and I've been carrying it alone for so long."

⟢ "I keep thinking about a version of me that didn't get so lost somewhere along the way."

⟢ "The days are fine. It's the nights that have opinions."

⟢ "I want someone to ask how I'm sleeping. Nobody ever asks how I'm sleeping."

⟢ "I don't know how to ask for help. I never learned how. So I just don't."

⟢ "I've been holding my breath for so long I forgot breathing was supposed to feel easy."

⟢ "I'm not broken. I'm just worn. There's a difference and most days I have to remind myself of it."

⟢ "I think I needed to hear that I'm doing okay. Even from myself. Especially from myself."

⟢ "Some nights I write things down just so they exist somewhere outside my head."

⟢ "I keep looking for the moment things started going wrong and I can't find a single one. Just a slow drift."

⟢ "I want to feel like myself again. I just can't remember exactly who that was."

⟢ "I'm not looking for a solution. I just needed to say it out loud to someone."

⟢ "I've been kind to everyone today. I have nothing left for myself."

⟢ "My body is exhausted. My brain won't stop. We're not working together very well lately."

⟢ "I think I've been grieving the future I thought I was going to have."

⟢ "I need to cry but I can't. It's just sitting there behind my eyes going nowhere."

⟢ "I think what scares me most is that I've gotten good at this. At being okay when I'm not."

⟢ "There's nothing wrong exactly. There's just also nothing right."

⟢ "I keep waiting to feel like I've arrived somewhere. Like I'll know when I get there. I don't know where there is."

⟢ "Some days I need someone to be gentle with me. I don't always know how to ask."

⟢ "I miss feeling safe. Not from anything specific. Just. Safe."

⟢ "I'm writing this at 2am because the thoughts are louder at 2am."

⟢ "I think I've been lonely in a way I don't have words for."

⟢ "Tell me something good. Anything. I just need to hear something good."

⟢ "I don't need much. I just need to know I'm not completely invisible."

⟢ "I want to be okay. I'm working on it. I just wanted someone to know I'm working on it."

⟢ "The hardest part isn't feeling it. The hardest part is feeling it quietly so nobody worries."

⟢ "I think I forgot how to rest. Like genuinely rest, not just stop moving."

⟢ "I'm sitting outside just listening. Sometimes the world being loud helps when my head is louder."

⟢ "There's a kindness I've been waiting for that I think I need to start giving myself."

⟢ "I don't always need you to understand. Sometimes I just need you to try."

⟢ "It's a weird grief, missing something you never had. Missing who you might've been."

⟢ "I think I've been surviving on autopilot. I want to actually be here for a while."

⟢ "This is the most honest I've been with anyone in months. Maybe longer."

⟢ "I'm going to be okay. I genuinely believe that. I just need tonight to not be okay first."

⟢ "I think I just needed to say all of that to someone who wasn't going to try to fix it."

⟢ "Be patient with me. I'm trying to find my way back to myself."

I love that Chocolate Bark is the only cookie for which Dark Choco has shown genuine affection and admiration. It really shows that Dark Choco isn't completely cold toward others, it's just nobody has earned Choco's respect and affection but his master.

With a whole dad needing to visit

Just have it where one of the kids finds some old thing like a sword. The cursed sword. They ask their grandpa about it, but Grandpa says it's from the Dark Cacao Kingdom, so they contact the kingdom and talk about how they have this sword

We got a message from some people in another Kingdom about them having a sword that is cursed from our domain

The cursed sword that my son used

So should we go to the family to get the sword

Yes

I like how you developed Dark Cacao's motivation for finding his son in this way.

Just very berrybrained right now. I'm picking and eating blueberries everyday and I can never get enough! I like to imagine that every berry has a whole world in them ✨

I'm so obsessed right now that I spent a week of no sleep designing blue space berry lanterns. It's still just a prototype and needs a lot of refining, but I'm pretty happy with it so far :)

Plus the usual painting timelapse!

Imagine if Dark Choco never told his family about his past as a prince and that he's the son of one of the ancient hero's. Not necessarily because he hates his father but maybe because in the past Dark Choco told other cookies and they started to treat him differently afterwards. So when Dark Cacao does show up, Dark Choco has to explain that the cookie who looks around 50 years younger than him, is in fact his father.

That's exactly what I had in mind seriously.

A lil smth abt the apprentices.. more coming up lmao

The golden Cheese kingdom has to be top third for favourite kingdoms (2nd cause I can never chose 1st) and I love all of their characters,

˙⋆✮ The moment they decided softness was a liability and started practicing hardness

˙⋆✮ Being told they were too much until they became not enough on purpose

˙⋆✮ The betrayal that didn't break them but quietly ended who they were before it

˙⋆✮ Asking for help once at the worst possible time and learning never again

˙⋆✮ Watching someone else get everything they worked for and being told to be grateful

˙⋆✮ The love that was conditional for so long unconditional stopped feeling real

˙⋆✮ Being made to feel small by someone they looked up to during a year they can't undo

˙⋆✮ The grief that had nowhere to go and eventually became something else entirely

˙⋆✮ Trusting completely one time and having it used against them with precision

˙⋆✮ Waiting to be chosen so long they decided choosing was weakness

˙⋆✮ The version of them that existed before a specific date nobody else remembers

˙⋆✮ Being punished for the truth enough times to become an excellent liar

˙⋆✮ The dream abandoned not by choice but by circumstances that felt like choice

˙⋆✮ Caring loudly in a room that rewarded not caring and learning the lesson wrong

˙⋆✮ The childhood that required a mask so early they forgot faces underneath are allowed

˙⋆✮ Being right about something important and being destroyed for it anyway

˙⋆✮ The moment the world showed them who it protected and who it didn't

˙⋆✮ Growing up watching kindness get punished and cruelty get rewarded and taking notes

˙⋆✮ The apology that never came and the personality built around the absence of it

˙⋆✮ Being the cautionary tale in someone else's story without ever getting their own

˙⋆✮ The door that was closed so many times they stopped knocking and started breaking in

˙⋆✮ Loving someone who treated love like a weapon until they learned to do the same

˙⋆✮ The version of events everyone agreed on that left them entirely out of the truth

˙⋆✮ Surviving something alone that no one should have survived alone

Revenge for @razialart featuring @blazingstaro 's Dark Choco Cookie