joy is not made to be a crumb

laying in bed, legs folded back and spread wide, knees in his ribs.

ryan's big hands pressing him down against the backs of his thighs, holding him down, holding him spread wide, and using all his strength and power and muscle to rail nico with hard, heavy, deep pounds of his hips against nico's ass.

nico's had great sex in his life. some of the greatest sex with ryan.

this might be the greatest ever.

he can't think. he can't move. he can't do anything but lay there with his arms up, one draped over his eyes. he can't even hear himself, though he's pretty sure whatever sounds he's making are completely out of his control. he is no longer a man. no longer a sentient being. no longer in control of his faculties.

he is but a vessel for pure, lightning-strike pleasure with each heavy thrust of ryan's dick into him, grinding over his prostate both on the way in and out at this angle, and nico really just cannot be held responsible for anything he says or does in this moment. it's not him. he isn't even here.

"i didn't hear what you said," ryan says and nico finds enough strength to move his arm off his face onto the pillow beneath his head. above him, ryan is a vision. blue eyes and messy hair and sweat dripping down his chest, glistening like the god nico is starting to think he might be. no human, no twenty-one year old should be able to fuck this good.

nico doesn't know what he said.

lost in the sauce.

he can't repeat whatever it was, can only moan for it. this kind of hard, heavy, deeply powerful fucking is perhaps what nico was made for more than anything else.

he can build his body for hockey. he can manipulate his macro intakes, he can train his muscles, he can shape and form the core and the glutes and the forearms needed to make him an incredible hockey player. that's all intentional, hard work.

but this?

how fucking good and right and perfect and natural it feels to be fucked within an inch of his life and come has hard as he does, untouched, nearly every time he does this?

he can only believe that he was made for it. made to experience this kind of pleasure and satisfaction.

"baby, what? what'd you say?" ryan asks him again and nico shakes his head a little. he doesn't know. he feels like he doesn't exist, in the best way. the nicest way. the most soul-expandingly happy way.

ryan gets it, nico knows. he knows nico can dissociate a little during really incredible sex. this isn't the first time. he hopes it won't be the last time.

sometimes all nico can do during sex this good is offer his body. he's useless otherwise. limbs not working. hands going numb with the way he's near hyperventilating the closer his orgasm barrels toward him.

it rips through him, back arching, spurting cum all up his chest, his neck, his chin, body wracked with the force of it. nico's maybe never come this hard, or this much, in his life and it's further making it better knowing ryan has a perfect view of the whole moment.

"Oh my fucking god," ryan pants above him. nico can feel ryan's sweat dripping onto him and it's sexy as fuck. the marathon, athletic sex they have is as good as any work out and it's so satisfying.

when ryan comes inside him nico wants to reach down and grip his hips and pull ryan closer, keep him pressed up, feeling his dick pump inside him.

but his arms don't work.

he's got pins and needles and can do nothing but happily lie there as ryan finishes. he thinks his legs are about to fall asleep too, as ryan finds the strength to pull out and let nico's legs down. the blood rushing back is tickly and nico squirms a little, stretches and flexes his legs as ryan collapses at his side.

they're both panting, both riding that wave of happy sex endorphins, both soaking in the moment.

"you back with me?" ryan asks with a little laugh as he turns to face nico, shifting onto his side and sliding his hand over nico's chest, making a worse mess of the cum splattered across him.

"i think so," nico hums, feeling like his brain is back online, probably.

"you were so gone," ryan tells him as he leans in to press kisses down nico's jaw. "kept mumbling something but i couldn't make it out," he says and nico laughs, blushes a little.

"felt too good," nico sighs as he tips his head toward ryan to ask for a proper kiss that ryan happily gives.

"it's so hot, how much you love it," ryan says as he kisses nico again. his hand slides down nico's body to run his fingertips up and down nico's now-soft dick, playing idly with his foreskin.

nico could probably be interested in going again if he keeps that up, but mostly he knows it's pretty innocent. ryan is an extremely physically affectionate person, gentle touches, soft snuggles, wandering hands just for the sake of being able to touch nico.

"i don't think my legs are gonna work for awhile," nico sighs, closing his eyes. a nap could be nice. but they're both covered in drying sweat and cum and lube and a hot shower will probably be as nice.

ryan kisses him again before nico feels the bed dip as ryan gets up, hears the shower start a moment later. ryan will let it heat up and then come get nico, and they'll clean up together and maybe jerk each other off in there, and clean up again, and it will be perfect.

nico didn't know it could be perfect, like, this, always.

“great dive,” nico grins as ryan drapes his arms over nico’s shoulders in the water.

“yeah, i’m like, basically a pro. should switch careers,” ryan says, cocky and confident and sure of himself as ever.

“of course,” nico laughs, hands finding ryan’s waist, and delighting in the way ryan wraps his legs around nico’s.

“you ever have sex here?” ryan asks with a cheeky, devious smirk, taking advantage of their buoyancy and rocking his hips against nico’s.

“no!” nico yelps, squeezing ryan’s hips. “i’ve never had a boy here. and besides, my parents…”

“are in town,” ryan says with a mischievous wiggle of his eyebrows. “is it kinda twisted that I love that i’m the first to come here?”

“the only,” nico corrects. “first and only, ever. past or future.”. nico knows ryan has a bit of a possessive streak and he’ll love to hear that. it’s also bold of nico to say, he supposes, when they’ve only been seeing each other for six or seven months, but. nico is all in.

“that’s hot,” ryan says and nico laughs as he’s kissed by ryan who rocks their hips together again. “lemme jerk you off,” he says and nico whines.

nico makes them get to shallower waters where they can more easily touch the bottom, up against the dock posts where they’ll be somewhat hidden from view of the main property. they get their swim shorts down enough to get their hands on each other and it’s so, so hot.

outdoors, in the lake, sun beating down. nico’s trying to be quiet as possible lest any of his family members turn up. at least it’s easy to get off quickly because they’re so goddamn easy for each other it takes barely any time at all before nico is gasping into their kiss, ryan following him right along.

“mmm, babe,” ryan sighs, pressing softer kisses to ryan’s lips. “you’re so sexy, it’s insane.”

“are you two done?!”

nico wants to positively die inside when he hears his sister’s voice call out from up by the house. he knew someone could arrive any time but.

“fuck off,” nico yells back, blushing as he and ryan get their shorts back up.

ryan is cackling with delight. nico knows nina could think they were just making out and nothing more, but he’s still embarrassed. it’s like he loses all his senses of propriety when he’s with ryan. so blinded by their chemistry and being completely in love; that constant giddy, warm, excitement at all times.

“mom and dad will be home in a few minutes,” nina says, and nico hears her laugh. “compose yourselves!”

“oh my god,” nico groans and tries to relax into it when ryan presses up close to kiss him again.

“whatever she saw, no she didn’t,” ryan laughs, presses sweet little kisses to nico’s lips.

“alright, alright,” nico laughs a little shyly as ryan slides his hands up over nico’s chest and neck to cup his face.

“your big sister knows you fuck, babe,” ryan laughs and kisses him again, a little dirtier this time.

“i’d like to pretend she doesn’t,” nico says but he knows ryan’s just trying to get him to relax.

“my big sisters believe I am a pure untouched virgin,” ryan says and nico smirks because he knows the truth. knows the absolute filth ryan has said and done to him in bed.

“they don’t know you’ve come inside me and eaten me out immediately after,” nico says, which makes ryan sputter his laughter, and makes nico grin at getting him.

“hey!” ryan says with a pinch to nico’s ass. “and i’d do it again. anytime. every time.”

“maybe later,” nico laughs and nods his head toward the dock for them to climb out of the water. he takes a moment to appreciate ryan’s wet, glistening, body as he hosts himself up, water dripping off of him, shining like some kind of gift just for him, designed in a factory whose entire mission was to create some kind of Man of Nico’s Dreams Ken Doll.

ryan’s wearing navy blue swim shorts that would fit an average dude just fine but ryan’s huge thighs and sculpted ass make them taught and shorter than they should be and nico’s mouth waters a little as he lets himself look.

“are you zoning out because i’m so hot?” ryan asks and nico sees the smirk on his face when he jerks his eyes up from scoping out ryan’s body.

“shut up, i’ll push you back in,” nico says, gives ryan a gentle shove as they walk up the dock together.

ryan laughs, big and bright, and nico follows him up to the house where they’ll dry off in the sun, sunk into adirondack chairs, a beer in hand.