Optimus Benign

+Trying to understand a single word

Paid for beer at a painting class and then stopped paying attention.

Fun while it lasted, but baby had to cry.

All I do is flex.

Hanging out in the subway sounds like a whole lot of fun all of a sudden.

What happens when a magician starts to think he's really magic? Possibly the best Super Bowl Half Time Show ever to go directly from half-baked idea to screen. The balls they had to put this on television. As if the half-assed Elvis stunt isn't insulting enough, they really thought that everyone watching was going to choose the same card. Was that even an official Clap-O-Meter? I didn't see the trademark. This is also why the Bengals will never make it to another Super Bowl. Note: While the video does end hilariously and any more might have had me gouging out my eyes, I'd love to catch the rest of the show sometime.

La Croix...La CROIX Grown ass Manitoba.

Because we're closer to 30 than we are to 20.

Eleven fights means twenty-two competitors will be giving it their all in Juan on Juan action at the UFC's first outing in the badlands of Mexico. I may even walk away remembering the names of a few of these new comers. Bring your bottled water, this shouldn't be one to miss.

It happened – the real life Jimmy Junior was spotted at a dance competition in 2010. Such imaginative, incredible moves.It's unfortunate that he's since given up on inline skating, but at least he found a shirt.

Look what it's done for this 70 year old doctor. Who doesn't want nipples that long?

This is the scariest thing I've seen this Halloween. It'd probably be scary on any other day, too.

Let's not dance around it – this is another subpar PPV. Is Zuffa trying to poison us with these shit sandwiches? We don't know yet. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely some interesting prospects and matchups here worth watching...but not outside of downtrodden realm of the hardcore fan.

The Stooges - 1970

Even if it's just long enough to remake and sell me one of these t-shirts.