Things my dentist has actually said to me:
βWell, either the x-rays lied to me or you are spontaneously creating teeth. Iβm going with the second one because itβs way cooler.β
βWhen was the last time you flossed? Your gums arenβt bleeding which means Iβm either not doing this hard enough or you actually floss your teeth regularlyβ
βYou donβt need to do a fluoride treatment I just want to go check my facebook for a second and this is the best excuse I can come up with. Donβt worry your insurance will cover it.β
βTake a whole handful of toothbrushes, I canβt order new ones in less ugly colors until these ones are gone.β
βRemember not to eat or drink anything for a half hourβ¦or actually you know forget that go eat lemons and drink coffee right now. I make money based on peoples bad decisions, you should probably stop brushing your teeth too.β
βI became a dentist because I like making children cry and they donβt let you do that as a regular doctor.β
Chaotic neutral dentist?
