fortune favors the bold

—

“You would think but most of them are grown adults, yet they continue to act otherwise.” But it was what made the hardest parts of the job all the more worthwhile when she knew that there was a point to it all. She could do her best to keep them as safe as possible and they would push the limits, yet it would always keep at it no matter what. Her love for the pack only grew stronger over the years and continued that way, even the ones that didn’t know if the pack was their home yet or not. Zoey laughed. “My opinion is truthful and if it hurts, well then, suck it up buttercup and let’s go. All I want tonight is food and maybe a margarita or two. Something to really take an edge off this week and we can’t do that if we’re constantly sitting here among your book friends,” she pointed out with a smile, blindingly bright in order to get the other to move a bit faster. “You are a doll and a peach and drop dead gorgeous, dressed up or not. Come on, let’s go. I’m starving here and you wouldn’t like me when I’m hangry. I become a real beast.”

— 

“I admire your dedication to protecting the people you love, you know.” She said, unsure if it was the right thing to say; normally, her own inability to protect her loved ones kept her from broaching the subject of family. She had none she spoke to, but still, she tried, tried to be a good friend to those she cared about and she really did care, sometimes to the point where it felt more like a curse than a blessing. And yet, she was left with the feeling that none of her efforts were ever enough — not when she’d failed to protect the one person who had needed her the most. “Not sure I’m as much of a fan of your tough love, but I’ll take it.” Liv chuckled in the process of getting ready to go out. “I want to thank you, but part of me isn’t sure if you’re saying that to be nice to me or to get me to hurry up.” She reckoned the answer was probably both, which made her laugh again. “Wait, this isn’t hangry already? In that case I’m definitely scared.” 

The clicking of her fingers across her keyboard slowed down considerably before halting completely as she listened to the other speak. Catalina tilted her screen completely out of the way, a grin talking over her face. “Is that so? I mean I can totally see something like that happening. When your brain just locks into something, sometimes I guess it’s hard to remember to do other things.” Lina tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she tilted her head, curiously. “Research? You must either work closely with the supernatural history department, or you’re part of it, yeah?” She folded her hands and set her chin on top of them. “Hmm, I’d love to pick your brain about a few things if you’ve got the time.”

— 

Liv observed her slowing process of typing until the other woman’s attention was focused on her, which made her grin in return. She hadn’t expected her to pick up much conversation given how engrossed she seemed in her work, but she didn’t exactly mind it either. “Could be that, sure. Or maybe they were just being lazy. As their coworker who picks up a lot of slack, I feel like I reserve the right to say that.” She chuckled, purposely making it sound more dramatic than it had been. After all, she’d certainly left a dirty mug around before and had forgotten about it amid a chaotic day. “I’m a lecturer at the supernatural history department. Well, I’m first and foremost a historian, but I mostly teach these days.” She answered with a faint smile. Her brows arched at the next question, somewhat apprehensive as she mulled it over. Liv was used to being the one who asked the questions, not the other way around. “Yeah, sure? If I can be of any help to you. I’ll certainly try.”

—

No, he hadn’t left her alone. It would have been better in the long run sure if he had just tossed his phone and lost her number when he began to crave the nights to reach out and see her. Touch her. Remember her. Koda knew better than to think that he was anything but a fucking mess when it came to screwing everything up in his life as he let out a bitter laugh when he was done with his drink. He set the empty bottle down on the coffee table that was before them both now that she sat down beside him, staring at it rather than the eyes on his face. “You deserve better, you know that? Someone that ain’t gonna yank you around when they’re feeling lonely and then pushing you aside when they remember what a fucking piece of shit they are,” he told her as he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. “It ain’t fair to you but the thought of getting close to you… I couldn’t do that. I thought — I thought that if I walked away that you would too and then you’d realize that this thing between us was nothing more than two lonely people trying to be a bit less lonely.”

—

Her gaze was darting between the empty bottle and his frame, his bitter laugh catching her off guard. Liv released a shaky breath, features furrowing when he told her she deserved better. How was something else that didn’t make her feel the way she felt when things were good between them better? “Don’t say that.” Her frown deepened as she shook her head, placing a hand atop his leg in hopes he would finally face her. “You’re not... you were never a piece of shit.” She insisted. His next words rendered her silent for a while, even if she wanted to, she couldn’t hide the hurt flickering in her eyes. Again, a part of her urged her to leave, to walk away since she couldn’t mask how she felt. But she was beginning to realize that doing that wouldn’t make things any easier on her; she knew all too well bottling up her feelings never had the desired effect. “You were already pretty close to me, before you walked away. At least it felt like you were.” She finally admitted, but with that came her turn to tear her gaze away. “I tried that. I tried, but I... I came back because this thing between us doesn’t feel like nothing anymore, not to me. I didn’t come here to be less lonely, I came here for you.”

—

“ Well you didn’t exactly give me a chance, did you?” Seth replied to her, it was a statement rather than a question, “ No, you made an assumption about me instead, you assumed I would react badly to you telling me you needed time.” he added, “ Do you really think that low of me?” he shook his head and ran a hand through his hair in frustration. Seth stared at her stunned when she told him what was going on, he didn’t say anything, instead he just let her talk while he tried to sort through all of the different thoughts and emotions running through him. When she was done talking, he looked away from her and continued to process her words. His whole demeanor shifted, he went from being relatively relaxed to extremely tense and guarded. He really wished she had told him this sooner, if he had known, things would’ve never gotten as far as they did between them. He honestly didn’t know what to say to her, none of what she said was by any means a nice thing to hear. He hated this position he suddenly found himself in and he hated the fact that she had put him there. 

— 

“I told you, I didn’t know what to say.” Liv countered, exasperation tinging her voice as her brows furrowed with both growing frustration and worry. She never wanted things to wind up the way they had, had hardly realized just how complicated everything had gotten before she found herself so tangled up in the mess, she no longer knew how to find her way out of it. “I never made that kind of assumption, stop putting words in my mouth. I didn’t know how to describe what I was feeling and I... I never meant to upset you. But I did, by not telling you anything, I did. I know that now.” She nearly apologized again, but he had told her he wanted answers, not apologies. She had given him just that, but by doing so, she could tell she had only made things worse — her gift kicked in when she least wanted to, her heart heavy as she studied his demeanor and knew she had caused him to feel that way. “Seth.” She half-pleaded in an attempt to urge him to speak, the silence almost harder on her than an argument. Tentatively, Liv stepped closer, her hand reaching out to graze his just barely. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what else I can say... I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

—

“Whoever said that edible gifts aren’t the best… well, they’re lying.” The petite brunette chuckled softly as she waved her friend further into her house, offering to take Liv’s jacket to hang it. She was quick to add some water in the coffee maker and left it there, before returning to the living area to join Liv. “Oh, right! You’ve mentioned something about your witch heritage. How’s that working out? Are you having some help or… I don’t know… something?” Sara was much well-versed in the whole werewolf world, judging by the people who surrounded her. Except for Laurel and Nick, she didn’t think she knew any other witches. None that she could remember at the moment. Thinking about werewolves made her want to ask Liv about Teddy, but she didn’t. She forced herself not to. It was the right thing to do. “I’ve been okay.” And, for the first time in a while, Sara actually meant it. “I’ve been focusing on myself lately, too. I started volunteering at Sacred Haven, so that’s been nice. Binnie’s okay! He’s actually napping now. We went on a picnic with the moms from his baby class, so he came back exhausted.” She chuckled. “But I don’t think you want to hear about moms and babies. What have you been up to lately? Besides working on your magic, of course.”

— 

“I second that. Or maybe they just never received any, in which case I’d probably be just as cynical.” Liv huffed a short-lived chuckle under her breath, thanking her friend as she took her jacket. She did just as Sara had told her, making herself at home as she took it upon herself to plate the pastries she’d brought. Sara’s question about her witch heritage made her shrug in response, smiling wryly. “It’s... working out, sort of. I’m working on it.” She admitted. “Yeah, um, I’m trying to get an idea of which covens are out there and who could help me get a better grasp of the aura situation.” Her smile grew as she listened to Sara, carrying the plates over to the coffee table. “I’m glad to hear that. The being okay part and the focusing on yourself part.” A pause lingered, Liv had but a rough idea of what was going on from working with Teddy, but she wouldn’t pry, it was entirely up to Sara to raise that topic if she wanted to. “Oh, no, I don’t mind hearing about moms and babies. It’s a nice change from covens and abstract magic. I’m afraid I’m just not as well-versed as you are.” She mirrored her friend’s chuckle. “Well, besides magic, there’s work...” Liv trailed off, unsure whether she should share the chaos that had unfolded in other aspects of her life. With a looming grimace, she breathed a sigh. “And some minor romantic catastrophes.”

—

“It’s ‘cause — you didn’t do or say anything, not on purpose at least,” he told her after a beat, unable to meet her gaze and instead decided to try and finish off the beer in his hand. When it came to talking about how he felt or shouldn’t, Koda knew when it was better to keep his mouth shut even if that hadn’t been the case here with her. If anything, he shouldn’t have even texted her after she ignored him at the festival because it was exactly what he deserved when she deserved none of what he did to her. “It probably would have been better if you had done. something to fuck things up but instead, that was all me. Still am, just by asking you over when I should have left well enough alone.”

— 

Liv was beginning to feel as though their conversation was futile, every attempt of hers to talk overshadowed by his cryptic words and the overwhelming feeling that she shouldn’t have come. It wasn’t because he’d hurt her, but because it seemed like it would have been better for him, too. Neither of them knew what to say, so she contemplated leaving — to avoid causing more damage, to take the easy way out. But nothing about it felt easy, not when unspoken truths plagued her mind, and would do so even if she turned on her heel. “But you didn’t. You didn’t leave me alone, and I came.” She spoke, her features softening as she walked over and sat down next to him, finally turning her head to face him. “You told me you texted me because you wanted to see me. Well, I came because I wanted to see you, despite everything. I never wanted to be left alone, Koda. Not then, and not now.”

“ I’d be lying if I said that it wasn’t a contributing factor to how my day went.” Seth replied to her, he was very much a focused guy when it came to what he did and even who he was. In his life being unfocused could mean life or death, he had people that relied on him every day, his pack, his work colleagues, his family, the city he took an oath to protect. “ But you did.” Seth said, “ You did ignore me, it doesn’t matter that you didn’t mean too.” he continued, “ Olivia, I’m a grown man, you didn’t hurt my feelings by not getting back to me, what bugs me is that you didn’t tell me anything, if you told me that you were going through some stuff, I would’ve understood. I know sometimes people have to work through their shit on their own.” he said. He wasn’t looking for an apology from her, he was looking for an explanation, plain and simple, and yet so far all he got from her was apology after apology, he got it, she was sorry. He studied her closely, taking in her body language, her expressions, something more was going on here, he could see it in her eyes, “ Whats really going on?” 

—

“If it’s any consolation, my day didn’t exactly go the way I’d planned either.” Liv answered, knowing fully well it was hardly a consolation, but what was she supposed to say? She owed him an explanation, which meant that one way or another, she would have ruined his day. She nodded in response to his words, but eventually, her jaw clenched. She deserved to hear it, but his words stung nonetheless. “But I didn’t know that, did I? I didn’t know how you’d react if I just told you I was working through my shit on my own, so I guess I thought it would be better not to tell you anything at all until I worked through it.” But had she, really? Either way, he wanted answers and she knew she needed to talk despite not fully understanding her own feelings. She inhaled deeply, glancing away for a while before she met his gaze again. “Before we ran into each other in town, at the bakery... I met someone else. It was never serious, so I didn’t think anything of it.” But it felt serious. Despite wanting to run from it, the realization was slowly but surely dawning on her. “But then we went on a few dates and the festival happened and I... I thought I’d feel a certain way about us. I wanted to, but I was just confused, I guess. So I waited.” The feelings she had hoped for had come, but for someone else, only she couldn’t bring herself to say that out loud. “I still don’t feel that way.”

Once Olivia made her way inside, Seth closed the door and followed her into his living room. He took a look around the room, the suit jacket he wore to work that day was draped over a chair which really wasn’t unusual, he was just glad that he had remembered to put his gun away when he got home earlier, he didn’t like having it out when people were over. Seth raised his eyebrows at her slightly when she told him that he looked exhausted, when she asked if he had a long day he nodded, “ In a manner of speaking, yes, it was a very long day.” he replied, it was small talk, plain and simple. He knew she was stalling, skirting around the issue, he’s dealt with this tactic more than once while questioning suspects, it just prolonged the conversation, it never kept him from getting to the point. “ So… what’s been going on?” he asked her.

— 

“In a manner of speaking, right.” The brunette echoed, grimacing slightly. She knew she should have let it slide, he had every reason to be curt with her, but Liv wanted him to know that she cared. Despite the distance and lack of communication between them, she cared. That feeling had always been genuine, and remained unaffected by her whirlwind of emotions. “I’m sorry if I added to it.” She presumed their texts had done as much, they had made her day harder, too. Palms rubbed together as she considered her next words, but Seth beat her to it. Straight to the point, she wasn’t surprised. “I know I should’ve responded to your calls and texts right away, I... I never meant to ignore you, and I didn’t forget. They — you were still on my mind. I just didn’t know what to say.” She took a deep breath, too many things on her mind at once, she struggled to get hold of a single clear thought. “I’m sorry about that, too.”

—

Seth had a long day already, work was crazy and the fact that Olivia was going to come over to talk played heavily on his mind, no matter how hard he tried to push it to the side, he was unfocused for the rest of the day and he hated it. He was frustrated and tense by the time he got home that night, he cracked open a beer, hoping it would help take some of the edge off, it worked a little, but not as much as he would like. Seth was sitting in his office, dealing with some pack business when he heard his doorbell ring, he made his way out of his office, closing the door behind him before he headed for his front door. He ran a hand through his messy hair before he pulled open the door, seeing Olivia standing there, the look on her face seemed to speak volumes. Seth cleared his throat and pulled the door open wider for her, “ Come in.” he said. 

— 

Liv had run into a handful of moments already that had led her to curse her ability to read auras. Usually, they were moments during which she herself was fraught with feelings she couldn’t process, noticing another’s only creating an overflow she wanted hide from at best. She neither moved nor spoke up as she stood in front of Seth, the weight of weeks without clear communication and emotional chaos on her part heavy on her shoulders. With an unceremonious nod, she entered and walked until they stood in his living room, the familiar setting adding to her inner turmoil. “You look — exhausted, actually.” She knew she should have said good, but she figured they’d moved past pleasantries already. Still, it didn’t stop her from stalling. “Long day?”

“I could only be so lucky. Maybe then I’d be the rocket scientist my moms always joked that I’d grow up to be?” She kept reading over her rough draft, even as she spoke to the other woman. Multitasking was usually her middle name but even with so much caffeine in her veins, there was a limit to what one woman could do. With a heavy sigh she closed the laptop and gave her the attention she deserved. She was paying attention to her after all, even though she’s just rambling to herself. “Ugh, sorry about this mess. I think they may have secretly changed me to decaf around cup 3 or 4.” Cat laughed and let her grin mirror her table mates. “Is it really prying if I’m talking out loud though? I’ve just written something so many times and I know kind of what I want to say but I don’t know if it’s something I want other people to read yet? Not you but like the world in general if I post what it is. You know what I mean?”

— 

For a split second, Liv thought to counter that her mother used to just tell her she’d grow up to be an even bigger pain in the ass, but she figured it was best not to dampen the mood with those personal anecdotes. Instead, an amused smile graced Liv’s lips as she noticed the other still skimming her draft, she could relate. She’d definitely given other people only a fraction of her attention before while she was focused on her own work. “Don’t worry about it, you should see the supernatural history department on a long day. Dirty mugs everywhere, and no one around who feels responsible for cleaning up the mess.” Liv mustered a chuckle and took a sip of her own drink; surprisingly, she’d gone for a chai. She was slowly but steadily trying to kick that caffeine addiction of hers. “I... think I do. I conduct a lot of interviews as part of my research and I’m usually glad I’m not the one talking about my experience of being supernatural. I’m not sure I’d want that out there in the world either.”