Whenever I go through depression episodes, I have a bad habit of looking for happiness from other people. Whether they know it or not. Does it work? Yes, sometimes. It's's a gift & and curse, tho. That small happiness I seek becomes a big drug for me cause now all I want is more of it. I become so mentally attached, and I hate that shit fr. Especially if that person who was giving me happiness is now curving me! Mentally one of the most draining feelings ever for me, smh. I can just be sitting there, chillin', then boom! My mind just randomly wanna think about this person for a few minutes. I'm tired of it fr. But I guess this is what I get for playing stupid games. But it's never too late to change. who I am mentally and physically now, shouldn't define who I will be in the future... I want to be better, no more using ppl for happiness, I have to find my own path at that.
