No complaints

𝚃𝙰𝚂𝙺 𝟶𝟶𝟷:

               perfecting  that  final  stroke  of  eyeliner right  now  feels  like  the  most  pivotal  moment  in  her  career.  focused  on  her  reflection  in  her  hand  mirror,  with  the  epitome  of  precision  jordyn  places  the  perfect  line  of  black  liner  onto  her  eyelids –  careful  not  to  jump  at   the  sound  of  her  sister’s  heckling.  “ you  mean,  where’s  your  hair  drier,  jordy?  could  i  borrow  it  by  chance?”  she  corrects, putting  on  a  squeaky  voice  to  mock  her  sister’s.  though,  there’s  no  telling  who  the  blowdryer  actually  belongs  to.  their  things  always  seemed  to  get  mixed  together.  “bottom  drawer  in  my  bathroom  –  and,  will  you  relax?  we’ve  got  plenty  of  time.  take  a  chill  pill,  kay.”  letting  out  a  sigh  of  relief ,  satisfied  with  her  liner  jordyn  picks  up  a  tube  of  mascara.  “ finishing  my  makeup,  duh.  took  a  snack  break  a  few  minutes  ago –  you  weren’t  gonna  eat  that  leftover  thai  from  yesterday  right?”  

Their mother used to say the girls were two sides of the same coin. That always felt like more of a marketing angle than a fact. For as long as she could remember, Jordyn had always been the better sister. Prettier, sweeter, more talented, more humble, more polite. Kayden couldn’t count the amount of times someone tried to get close to her in an attempt to get to Jordyn. This year was the first time she booked something alone. And yet, It always felt like Jordyn was ahead. Same roles, same shows, same music, same events, same meet and greets. Even little things like this. Kayden is rushing around like a maniac, frazzled thoughts and scattered necessities on the kitchen counter. While Jordyn is over there. Smiling. Looking perfect. Acting perfect. An air of calm surrounding her. It’s something Kayden can never figure out. “We’re supposed to be there in an hour. If there’s any traffic downtown then it’ll take at least thirty minutes.” Add that to the twenty minutes it’ll take to finish her hair? Well, they’re practically late already. “It’s like you completely forgot what mom taught us.” She says without thinking, a sharp exhale following. They never talk about their mother. Especially not as a mentor. But Kayden still has those thoughts engrained in her. Rule number four. On time is late. “Nevermind. I’m going to finish my hair.”

Kayden wasn’t the type to worry about other people. Whatever she did was always in her own best interest. But that didn’t mean that she was invincible. Every so often... guilt found it’s way in. The first time she felt It was when the sisters were nine and Jordy took the blame for a mistake Kayden made. She never said thank you or owned up to kicking that casting director. The next time It happened was when she stole Jordyn’s audition for the Little Mermaid. That was still a big secret that she had no intention of owning up to. And the last time It happened was right now with Matty. Knowing damn well that she hung out with Mikey last night. And knowing damn well that neither boy was over the heartbreak of the other. “So. How you feeling? Lonely? I’m sure you have more people to hang out with than me.”

There were only a handful of people that Kayden truly enjoyed being around. Everyone else got the dazzling (fake, but cute) smile and a modest attitude that the diva certainly did not possess. For the most part, Jordy and her seemed to share friends. They each had one or two of their own. Like Jordy had Skyler and Kayden had Imogen. But Luciana was part of their group. The girls and their girls. Which meant Luci got dibs on the rare but fun side of Kayden. The side that didn’t mind going to parties every once in a while. “I’m not getting drunk tonight. I have a meeting bright and early. I refuse to look like the walking dead when I walk in.” She muses, fixing her eyelashes in the mirror. A look is thrown over her shoulder at Luciana. “However, if one of those dumb boys offers me a hit? I’m down.”

Truthfully, Kayden was so tired she could barely see straight. The last time she slept was over thirty hours ago and It was barely a two hour nap. Perhaps, she was taking too much on. Finishing their album, filming Grownish, memorizing her lines for the Little Mermaid. Every second of every day was booked. Even her social time was scheduled. Thanks to Jordy leaving the apartment so they couldn’t finish writing, there seemed to be a few hours open for Stella. “Will you run lines with me?” She questions, lounging on the couch. If anyone understands her, it’s probably Jordyn. But Stella is a close second. “They’re supposed to be casting my Prince soon. And I wanna be at least partly off book for the chemistry reads.”

“Where is the hair dryer?” Kayden practically yells through their apartment. Ever since they started managing themselves, life has gotten just a bit hectic. Missed calls, rushed meetings, scheduling issues. Being an actress is already a big job, but adding on singer and manager is borderline insane. Kayden’s always had an issue with giving up control. Especially with strangers. It didn’t matter how great their references were. “J, come on! We’re supposed to be having lunch with that magazine editor today.” Which doesn’t actually matter that much. But another chance to look good is another chance to look good. Her voice deflates watching her sister on the couch. Did she miss something? “Why aren’t you dressed?”

Kayden’s breath hitches. Any problems she had were always dealt with alone. And here was Skyler. Again. Trying to fix them. Why did he care so much? Why wouldn’t he go away? Why doesn’t he get tired of her? It was all a mystery. But when he said what he’d done-- She wasn’t sure what to think. Her feelings shifted again and again. At first, shock. She’s always seen Sky as some little softy. Like a personified cupcake that just punched a guy out for you. Then, relief. Relief that she didn’t have to deal with It anymore. And then anger, because he shouldn’t be trying to fix her problems. And then for just a split second: worry. Worry that he was hurt because of her. Worry that he could get hurt because of her. But quickly that worry shifts back to anger. “Why the hell would you do that? He was my issue to deal with. I don’t need a prince charming to protect me.” She bites out, a hand running through her hair in frustration. “You’re not my prince Charming.”

“Don’t say anything because only Jordyn knows. But sometimes when I’ve worked a long hard day and I need a breather... I will pig out on Hot Cheetos and watch Gilmore girls. I know that’s like the whitest show on earth. But I have my reasons.”

“J and my studio. Some of our best songs were recorded, written and completely changed in there. Our music is never finished there, but it always starts there. It means a lot to me. Being there means I’m still working for my dreams. And I always feel better knowing that.”

✨ or “proud” for one my muse’s proudest moments 

“If an interview asks, my proudest moment is J and I booking our first big roles on Grownish. But realistically? I’m much more proud of booking the Little Mermaid on my own. It’s the first thing I’ve ever done without her. It proves that I’m just as talented on my own, as I am with my sister.”

👧 or “teen” for a memory from my muse’s teen years

“My teen years were booked and busy. I guess I would say having my first kiss on a Disney show was pretty interesting. It’s a shame I didn’t like the guy though. He was cute in a preteen bopper kind of way. But not in a sixteen year old heartthrob kinda way.”

👹 or “nightmare” for a memory of a nightmare

I have a reoccurring nightmare. It’s like something out of harry potter. I know it’s not real, and I know It doesn’t make sense but It still freaks me the hell out. And it’s always the same thing. Something bad happens to Jordyn.. and I split in half. Not exactly the way you wanna wake up. Especially at the crack of dawn when my alarm goes off.”