( cierra ramirez / cis woman / she/her / rosemary ) did you just see AILEEN PARRA OROZCO walking through the halls? they’re a TWENTY-THREE year-old THIRD YEAR INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS student from MEDILLÍN, COLOMBIA. i’ve heard they have a tendency to be OPPORTUNISTIC AND COQUETTISH, but ASTUTE AND DETERMINED, too. rumour has it they’ve been a member of praeditus since their SECOND YEAR. well, anyway, you’ll know if you spot AILEEN again because they always seem to remind me of LIPSTICK STAINED MIRRORS, A DEMAND FOR OPULENCE, FAUX INNOCENCE PERSONIFIED, AND A PRISTINE, PERFECT REPUTATION ON THE VERGE OF COLLAPSING. just like the rest of us, they have something to hide.
stats:
full name: aileen yasmin parra orozco.
sexuality: bisexual, biromantic
hometown: medillín, colombia
birthday: july 16, 2000
zodiac: leo sun, leo moon, cancer rising
traits: astute, determined, coquettish, narcissistic, opportunistic, sociable
background:
born to a diplomat father and a socialite mother, aileen was always daddy’s perfect little girl growing up. though, her parents were never really around due to his career, so she was ultimately raised by nannies and butlers
growing up, aileen was always looking for attention from anyone who gave it to her. though, she knew she needed to be sneaky in how she received the attention. she was always the girl with the perfect marks, the perfect partner and the perfect hair. that’s exactly how she preferred it. even so, those who really, truly knew aileen knew that was far from the truth.
aileen ended up at meraviglia because of her father, of course. while he was never really around, she always wanted to follow his footsteps to become a diplomat as well. little did she know the truth about her father and how exactly he’d gotten her into praeditus due to his influence and shady dealings.
she wasn’t hesitant at all to join, considering her father wanted this more than anything for her. she supposed him launching her into success was his way of showing her he loved her, which is why she kept up the perfect girl image, despite her affair with heather. sometimes perfect got boring with cypress and nothing with heather was ever boring; that was her motivation. it felt good to have one thing to herself that wasn’t fabricated or a complete and utter lie.
personality:
she’s prim and proper but to an extent. aileen has a vice for partying and drugs, which is exactly what she uses as a form of escapism.
she knows she would be nothing without her father’s sacrifice, so she will do anything to make sure she succeeds, no matter who gets hurt, as long as she is declared the victor.
she’s very good at reading people, namely manipulating them into giving her what she wants. she loves a good challenge. schemes are integral to her displaying her power.
she’s been dating cypress for the longest time, however, she hasn’t exactly been faithful to them. aileen has never been able to only be tied down to one person.
she finds it boring and if she’s bored, then she goes looking for trouble.
she owns the fact that she’s the daughter of a diplomat and doesn’t let anyone forget it.
she’s studying international relations because she wants to be just like her father, not knowing exactly the man he truly is.
she was neutral towards professor dupont until the disappearance. now, she’s feeling anxious about her secret being revealed.
very much two-faced, purports herself to be someone entirely contradicting to who she truly is. knows her life would be over and she would cease to be loved if anyone found out she wasn’t as perfect as she claims to be.
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tallie glanced over at aileen, eyebrows lifting just slightly. it'd been a few days since she'd last seen her and that was very much by design. after emilia's secret had been leaked, tallie had been terrified by the prospect of her own getting out and fucking up her life and aileen's, too. she let a shrug roll off of her shoulders, "well, that depends, if that's what you told dupont to get in then..." tallie reminded her, "yeah, probably." she wasn't going to show her cards yet and tell aileen what she had revealed to their dearly deceased professor, "if it wasn't then you're home free, right?" wrong, but she wasn't trying to cause a fight before it was necessary.
clearly anxious of the potential consequences that would come with her secret affair being revealed to the public, she stared at tallie. aileen blinked obtusely at the taller femme before shaking her head at her. "if it comes to that, we'll obviously deny it. it's not like the person who has the book has evidence," she pointed out to tallie. "it's our word against a dead man's." it should've gone without saying that two could keep a secret if one of them was dead. however, what was the case if there was a third person? honestly, she didn't think tallie was the kind of person who would fuck her over. yet, she had to be cautious with how she would proceed if—a giant if—her secret came to light.
aileen couldn't believe the turnout for the funeral. it felt almost surreal that marcel had touched so many lives with how much of a miserable, lonely man he had been since she'd met him upon her initiation to join praedtius. then again, had that been the case? so many people at the meraviglia despised marcel and with good reason. he wasn't particularly the best person. not that she could judge. she wasn't the poster child for goodness or purity either. though, she wasn't a deceased middle aged man who had actively kept a detailed book with a group of twenty something year olds' deep and darkest secrets. how had no one else found that creepy? that was when it hit her: the very person that had the members spooked with the email blasts could've been in attendance, too. it would've made sense to hide in plain sight by posing as a mourner or a passerby. it was the perfect plan, actually, which made her the more warier now. she needed to take a seat and breathe. it would only get worse from here.
she sighed as she fixed the skirt of her dress before taking a seat next to someone she hadn't quite noticed yet. aileen immediately and successfully attempting to drown out everything that was going around her, even for just a moment. it wasn't until the other spoke that she snapped out of her trance.
as the last of the mourners are exiting the crowded building (which, richard notes, is far more crowded than he ever could have expected), he's perched himself on a step, nose and cheeks beginning to flush from the cold. he's not in any hurry to leave, however, and he's not in a rush; no matter how controversial of an opinion it may have been, richard de whitt always thought that marcel dupont was a great man. a brilliant mind, a brilliant professor, a brilliant leader. sure, his methods were a bit controversial, but aren't all the best leaders controversial at times? richard had borderline blackmailed the man to earn his spot in praeditus, but that never meant he didn't respect him. or that the sorrow of his loss wasn't weighing on him. he ponders this momentarily, that the magnitude of the tragedy was made so much greater by the man's brilliance — it's different than the death of some unassuming banker or common worker. it's marcel dupont, a genius, and murdered, too. it's almost akin to the assassination of caesar.
beware the ides of march.
richard fishes around in his interior coat pocket, pulling out a flask and opening it up, taking a swig. sure, a funeral isn't the most appropriate place to drink (understatement of the century, perhaps), but it's cold and the scotch warms him down to the bones. he notices a figure standing next to him, then, and looks up to see a familiar face. a wicked half smile appears on his features as he holds up the contraband, offering it to them and raising his eyebrow.
"lagavulin," he states, propping himself up on his free hand, "seems like you could use it — you look like hell."
since she was a child, funerals and hospitals were the last two places aileen liked to go to. both reeked of literal death and only served to prove that life really was too short, which was what made her stay far, far away from either for as long as she could. given current familial circumstances, the idea of loss, grief and death were far too much for her stomach, let alone actually let herself process. shoving all the unpleasant emotions down was a better alternative than talking about it.
much to her own chagrin, however, marcel's funeral had been the exception she couldn't ignore, and not because she cared for the man or loved him, like a few of the others. aileen was there out of her own volition for her own selfish reasons: control and paranoia. had it not been marcel's funeral, she would've simply faked sick and stayed home. no skin off of her back. that was, until there was someone allegedly got ahold of marcel's book of secrets. after all, how else would they know about emilia's secret? unless something more sinister and nefarious was going on. could one of their own be conspiring against the group? she genuinely didn't even want to think about that. it was a much better option to simply stand there and look pretty.
she hadn't been expecting richard to offer her his flask of liquor. for the most part, aileen generally kept her distance from the debauchery that went on between the praeditus members. except for that one time that she decided to get high and throw a bottle right next to genevieve's direction. in her defense, she hadn't even tossed the bottle at the other woman. it had simply ricocheted and genevieve had been collateral damage. that was all ancient history to her anyway, regardless if the femme had forgiven her or not. naturally, she was sure genevieve's friends, people like william, had their own thoughts about the situation. not that she cared.
"are you trying to poison me?" she asked derisively, quirking a manicured brow as she took the contraband and took of a swig of it anyway.
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even in grief she’s graceful, head bowed as she descends the steps of the cathedral, tear stained cheeks disguised by soft rainfall. black echoes surround her as the student body leaves the building, solemn mouths turned downward as a dark tension sweeps over them. the ceremony had finished and yet she felt nothing close to closure, chest brimming with a cocktail of fright, anxiety and dread. gemma is roughly wiping at her eyes when a figure approaches from behind - her body seizing in fear at the movement, before relaxing at the sight of her fellow praeditus member. ( there is still a murderer afoot after all ! )
“so - what happens now?” she’ll ask with a trembling bottom lip, a poor attempt at holding herself together.
marcel dupont's funeral was the last event aileen had wanted to attend. alas, appearances were everything and she had much more to lose if she hadn't gone. still on edge after emilia's secret had been exposed, aileen was cautiously walking on eggshells since then. she had been more socially withdrawn when it came to the other praeditus members, namely keeping more to herself. unfortunately, this led to her incidentally pushing certain people away. even so, aileen figured it was easier that way. she needed to focus on polishing up her seemingly pristine image, just in case she was the blackmailer's next victim. she couldn't lose everything she had built.
she sighed as she gently took gemma's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze before running her thumb tenderly over the other femme's knuckles. "now? we wait." there was not much for the group to do now until the unknown person who was in complete control planned on striking hard and releasing chaos again. "it'll be okay." she wasn't sure if she was trying to convince herself or gemma, at that point.
"mmph," he mutters, entirely content to snooze away all of it - he and aileen's fight, the (in tallie's words) narc, the day they had ahead of them, all of it. right now, the light was golden, aileen was warm, and they felt good. she'd come home with him and didn't make an excuse to leave. it was the most dom could ask for. "five more minutes." then, as his face scrunches, he tries to bargain with, "cinco mas... minutos? fuck, there's no shot that's right."
he chuckles, his voice still husky with sleep, and lifts himself onto a single palm, apologizing for his initial greeting by pressing a kiss to either corner of aileen's lips. "is it terribly insensitive of me if i say i slept better than i have in weeks?" dom's smile is honey-sweet and syrupy as he drops his head, tucking his nose beneath her jaw and kissing there, too. "you might need to stay over more often."
in retrospect, how could she be so idiotic in risking her relationship with dominic, a sure thing, for her affair with tallie? essentially, their attraction to one another was pure and carnal lust and nothing more, at least that's what she had tried to convince herself to believe to soften the blow. deep down, she knew it wasn't true. not even a little bit true. truthfully, it would've been easier if she didn't care for tallie. it would have made cutting her out of her life that much easier. only it wasn't easy.
nonetheless, whatever she had with the femme didn't come close to the years she'd spent with the homme laying right next to her. she needed to remind herself of that. even so, for the first time in what felt like forever for aileen, the pair had been on the same page. it had been a true pity that it had taken her boyfriend's roommate's secret being exposed to get to this point with each other. either way, she couldn't be more grateful to share this moment with him, as convoluted as that may have sounded aloud. "actually, that was perfect, baby." clearly, she was still impressed by him.
at his warm, affectionate and reciprocated gesture, aileen hadn't realized how much their break had taken a mental toll on her until a stray tear fell down to her cheek before she quickly wiped it away. she was relieved that he still loved her, in spite of all her flaws. that would never change, she hoped. aileen clung to her boyfriend, her arms securely wrapped around his neck. the latina was unable to stop herself from grinning from ear to ear as she held him close to her. relaxing against his touch, she simply nodded her head, humming in delight. "no, i know exactly what you mean. i sleep better when you're around," she murmured in an uncharacteristically soft tone. "you make me feel so safe and loved, dom. no one's ever made me feel this way."
"you don't think they know about...?" she couldn't even say the words. though, she was sure tallie knew exactly what she was referring to. the energy between the pair had been off as of late, namely because they'd been avoiding each other like the plague after the blast. if someone did know their secret, they were both fucked. of course the blowback would've been heavier on her end, considering she had been dating dominic at the time of her affair with tallie.
“it’s okay.” gemma’s used to this, subconsciously, choosing to forgive, never holding a grudge. she’s a good person, even if this thought never crosses her mind. this trait has not come easily to her. from an outsider’s perspective, you’d probably wonder how she turned out this way; birthed from toxicity and raised by the gluttonous gaze of the bourgeoisie. in every other alternate universe, she would have most likely fallen victim to the darkness, became the picture of greed, an addictive personality and a shameless hedonist. and yet, she’s a woman with a soft heart and a softer touch, the layer of golden film caressing her brain hardly stained by the maroon morbidity of her upbringing. “this has been tough on everybody. i’m barely holding it together myself, if i’m being honest.” she says this as though it’s a secret - despite the fact it was undoubtedly obvious to the rest of the group - she had never been good at holding back her tears. “honestly, you probably did everyone a favour by throwing that wine bottle. at least it stopped them all from drinking it. the last thing anybody needed was more alcohol. ”
"it's really not okay. you shouldn't let people treat you like that, regardless of who they are." ironically, aileen was used to treating people like shit. it came with the territory of being who she was: the parra orozco heiress. essentially, aileen had possessed her mother's beauty and sophistication, which arguably got her what she wanted most if not all of the time. and even then, it wasn't enough to overshadow what she'd inherited from her father: his cunningness, anger and pride. paired with her mother's looks and her father's temperament, it was no surprise she'd turned out so spoiled and entitled, and not because of the multiple dollar signs attached to her two surnames or her silver spoon upbringing. the similarities between her and her parents were striking, which begged the question: if she was so much like her parents, was she destined for a life of unhappiness and full of regrets as well? "you're right. we're all going through a lot and coping in different ways," she noted with a nod before laughing at how quickly gemma was able to find a silver lining to bottlegate. it must have been nice to be a truly good person. she certainly couldn't relate. "it was pretty shitty communal wine, from what i could remember. you know what? i really did do everyone a favor. too bad you're the only one with sense that can see that."
truthfully, chan had come to dom's apartment in search of, well, dom, but he stumbled upon aileen here instead. however, it's not an unwelcome appearance. though chan took a while to warm up to aileen when she and dom first started dating many moons ago, he's accepted her presence in both of their lives and has come to the very apt conclusion that, as long as dom is happy and staying at aileen's side, so is chan. "no, really? you could have fooled me, i was sure you at least break six foot," chan says, voice dry in a way that you can't tell if he even knows how a joke is meant to sound.
he goes to dom's kitchen and grabs two wine glasses, plus some sprite from the fridge (he's not about to drink wine without a mixer — no matter how expensive the bottle is, chan will find it sour). "how was your summer?" chan asks, not because he particularly cares but because he knows it's the polite thing to do. it's something he's working on, that allergy to small talk that he inherited from his mother.
out of all of her boyfriend's male friends, she had found him to be the most decent and civil one to be around, or at least whenever the pair would meet by coincidence. she had never planned to see him. they weren't those kind of friends. still, maybe she didn't mind his presence and company because he didn't try to antagonize her like others had in previous occasions, or the simple fact that he regarded her as her own person and not just dominic's girlfriend. the latter was an obvious distinction a lot of members from praeditus couldn't make, even after knowing her for over two years. she supposed she'd take what she could get, for once. aileen typically wasn't someone who settled, however, there were more pressing matters to worry about.
at the joke regarding her height, she chuckled lightly. when it came to people talking about her appearance, she didn't take anything to offense for the most part, namely because she knew she was attractive and that alone made her powerful and desirable to the general population in tenfolds. "my summer?" she raised a brow at the question. "it was short." mostly filled with screaming matches between her parents and the news of her grandma's declining health. but again, they weren't those kind of friends. "what about you, chandler?" she asked as she poured their drinks.
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"right, as friends." tallie nodded, though she quirked an eyebrow. she knew aileen and there was no way she meant as friends. at least, if you asked tallie. tallie wasn't opposed to the 'just friends' thing, truth be told. she liked dom. she was kind and good and the kind of person everyone should want to be. hurting him felt wrong, even if it was so easy to be attracted to aileen. even if she thoroughly enjoyed fucking around with aileen. the thought of what she'd done to someone she considered a friend caused that rare guilty feeling. she snorted as she hugged the other young woman back, "favorite person ever? last i checked, you weren't victoria beckham or that chicken shop date girl. you maybe make top five." she pulled away from the hug with an amused smile, mostly just happy to be on mended terms with aileen, "kinda crazy you came all the way here just to tell me you missed me and apologized... can't believe i'm seeing your transformation into a softie in real time!"
"as it should be," she told the other woman with a bright smile, resisting the urge to not rip tallie's clothes right then and there and make the femme scream her name. while aileen came off as a selfish lover and an even more selfish person, she was very generous when it came to tallie and her pleasure. what could she say? there was something about making a pretty girl moan your name over and over again until her eyes rolled to the back of her head. enough of that, though. those days with tallie were over. aileen was intent on becoming a changed woman, for her, for dominic and for their relationship. "i'd remind you why i was your favorite but i don't think i can top the posh spice," she joked with a giggle. slightly disappointed once tallie pulled away from their hug, she locked eyes with hers before speaking again. "i care about you, tal. our relationship is important to me. what we have is probably one of the more important relationships in my life," she admitted in an uncharacteristically quiet tone. "you see me. you're one of the only few people in this world that actually sees me." for that reason alone, how could she stay away?
aileen had been watching her boyfriend sleeping for a moment, admiring how peaceful he looked when he wasn't carrying the weight of the world on his well built shoulders. to think, she was about to lose what they had for a meaningless fling with tallie bernal. it definitely had nothing to do with the piercing adorning his nose. in fact, the nose ring was a bonus to his charming good looks. "good morning, mi amor," she murmured softly, pressing a bunch of feather kisses to his face to wake him up gently. after last night's shit show, she wanted to make sure he was okay. more importantly, she wanted to make sure they were okay. "how'd you sleep?"
"hey, i'm all for unhinged bitch, but in a hot way, not a messy way." tallie replied, shoulders un-tensing just slightly as she looked down at aileen, "i've never seen you that messy. next time you ask for access to my coke stash, i'm declining the request." her voice took on a more teasing lilt, unable to stay too upset with the other. tallie had never been quick to anger, especially with those she deeply cared about. and she did deeply care about aileen, just in her own heedless, sometimes too tallie way. her affection for aileen was different than her affection for fitz or for gen. with fitz it was comfort and a feeling of home that she'd seldom felt growing up, with gen it was comfortable in the way a hot tub is comfortable in that it's a little uncomfortable but enjoyable, and with aileen? it was the kind of excitement you'd get going on a rollercoaster, unsure if your seatbelt is fully fastened. she chuckled softly, "well, i accept. for some reason, you're hard to stay mad at and i actually hate it. but i missed you too. i don't like avoiding you." she won't mention that she saw aileen across the library yesterday and promptly fled out a side door, "so yeah, i forgive you, but thin ice." she teased.
"maybe next time, you should do it with me. it's more fun when it's you and me. it's been a while since we did anything fun together." like clockwork, it didn't take long for aileen to catch herself and remind herself of her boyfriend's existence. "as friends, i mean," she clarified a little too late, knowing it wouldn't take her long before she'd inadvertently flirted with tallie again. unfortunately, she couldn't help herself. an inexplicable gravitational force always brought her back to tallie. no matter how hard she'd attempted to stay away from her out of respect for dominic, it was much easier said than done. to put it simple, her connection with tallie went beyond sex and attraction, as she'd later come to find out. the woman standing before her had seen every side of aileen and had come to appreciate her anyway. on the other hand, she had never felt quite like herself with dominic, but that was mostly her own fault, not his. in the back of her mind, she'd convinced herself he would never want or love her if he knew exactly how flawed she truly was. "of course you missed me. i'm your favorite person ever," she teased back before pulling talle into a much needed hug.
emilia was no detective, but she knew that there had to be a little more to this situation than aileen having too much to drink. she threw a bottle at gen - something emilia couldn't say she didn't understand, but a bit extreme nonetheless. there was something that ran deeper, a singular thread connecting gen, dom, and aileen that had become visible to everyone in attendance last night. maybe it wasn't her place to get involved, but dom was one of her closest friends, and aileen was an extension of him - if he cared for aileen, then so did she, without question.
besides, lending an ear to listen wasn't getting too involved, she supposed. she wasn't taking sides, wasn't meddling, but was instead simply acting as a confidante, or a friend, should aileen need it. "i haven't eaten yet, but i've got some pasta on the stove." she closed the door behind aileen as the other woman entered the apartment. "there's plenty, so we can save dom a plate, too." emilia makes her way over to the kitchen, pulls out a couple plates, and dishes some pasta onto both. after handing one to aileen, along with a fork, she settles into her usual spot at the dining table. "are you sure you're alright?" her elbows rest lightly on the dark wood as she speaks - bad manners, she knows, but a habit she could never break. "i know you can take care of yourself, but with everything going on, i wouldn't judge you for not being 100% okay right now. god knows i'm not."
emilia was more than a pretty face; that observation had become more and more apparent to aileen in the time the two had gotten to know each other, mostly when aileen hung out at dominic's for a sleepover or at other praedtius member events. aileen had come to find that the other latina was perceptive and quiet, a dangerous combination in their world of luxury and ego. still, emilia seemed to be one of the few people in the praeditus club that didn't get on her nerves. the younger woman was kind-hearted and compassionate, something most of the others failed to be.
she wasn't sure what emilia had known about the situation, other than what dominic could've maybe told her since they were roommates and all. to her, it didn't seem like emilia was fishing for information for her own personal gain. aileen hoped she wasn't wrong about that assumption. "pasta sounds good," she answered as she followed emilia into the kitchen, thanking her for the plate. the idea of seeing dominic right now made her stomach churn, regardless if that had been her original objective. she was starting to feel an air of relief that he wasn't here, not so much because she didn't want to see him, but more so because she had to come to realize that she wouldn't have known what to say to him if he'd been home. against her better judgement, she decided to give emilia a tiny sliver of information of how she was feeling for once. "that marcel shit is messed up. but, i mean, we saw a lot that night... i'm surprised more bottles weren't thrown around by the others." as if that made it any better.
"baby, it doesn't matter, we're a team. sickness and health, better and worse." their team had been breaking, piece by piece, for awhile; even now, the regurgitation of the vows they're bound to make leaves a bitter taste on his tongue.
i've been trying to deal with it on my own, she says, and with every syllable, dom's tough-guy facade starts to crumble. she breaks her stare and it is a loss he wishes he did not feel, her voice wavers and he aches with a sympathy he wants nothing to do with — but then again, since when were his wants, his wishes, a factor in any equation?
"i'm sorry." for the second time since the cathedral, dominic offers a too-little apology, sinking onto the couch cushions next to aileen and placing his hand on her thigh. "that sounds like... it sucks. that sounds hard." his jaw flexes, his breath comes in a low, rushing exhale, but his worries, his suspicions, are assuaged. it's not everything, it shouldn't even be enough, yet still, dom is quick to slide an arm around aileen's shoulders and pull her in toward his chest.
maybe he's just trying to be a better partner than he is a friend. "do you want me to go with you to the dean? see about filling the paperwork for an academic leave, or... or something? get you home for a little while? i doubt they'd let me come with, but maybe?..."
"it's not your burden to carry, dom. it's mine," she managed to utter through her tears as she let herself collapse into his arms, clinging to him for dear life, just as she'd been clinging to their relationship, or what remained of it. she hadn't figured out exactly where they were just yet. did he even still want to be her boyfriend?
"i can't do anything to change any of it." her past infidelity with tallie, her dying grandparent and her parents' impending divorce had been completely out of her own control. it felt like the entire world was seconds away from collapsing right on top of her. it wasn't fair to put this all on dominic, but it would've appeared she had no one else to turn to. sure, she had friends she could confide him, but she wasn't ready to show them this disgustingly weak side of her. "i'm just stuck." she felt stuck in life, stuck their relationship, stuck in every conceivable way possible.
aileen buried her face into the crook of his neck as she cried harder, arms looped around him as she pulled him as humanly close to her as possible. she was finally willing to allow him to see that she was also fallible, in the face of claiming she was anything but imperfect. "i'm so sorry," she repeated over and over to him, visibly trembling as she tried to regain her composure, a fleet that seemed virtually hopeless in that single moment. after this pathetic emotional breakdown, he probably wouldn't look at her the same way again. she didn't know how to cope with that realization. at this point, it would have appeared she didn't have much of a choice.
at his selfless, expected offer to assist her with requesting an academic leave and potentially go with her back to colombia, she pulled back to look at him and then she simply shook her head, not having the energy to explain herself. all she could manage to whisper was: "you're so good to me." she truly didn't deserve him. on top of everything else going around in her life, she was the universe's worst girlfriend. then, to make matters worse, she pressed her lips to his. "i love you."
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a hurt expression graces features as aileen snaps at her, a fallen face casting shadows across the room. she understands, she supposes, where the girl is coming from, but she’s never been one for confrontation, would rather stew in her feelings than challenge another “i’m not going to ‘report back to genevieve’ ” shakes her head as she speaks, eyes focused on a speck of a dirt on the floor as if her own eyes can no longer handle the sight of the other. “i really do just want to make sure you’re okay. the other night was… intense.” as much as she’s tried to erase the evening from her mind she finds herself more often than not replaying it moment by moment - the fear, the sadness, the disorientation of it all. “that’s good to hear. i’m sorry for what happened. you didn’t deserve it. everybody was upset and confused - nobody was acting like themselves, i don’t think.”
at the palpable discomfort and pain etched onto gemma's picturesque facial features, her own face softened involuntarily. her intention had been to be as cruel as possible to the other woman to avoid their conservation from escalating into something real, however, it was practically impossible when she was looking at her like that. in fact, she almost found herself opening her mouth to apologize. then again, that would have been seen as a sign of weakness, so she dismissed that ridiculous notion quickly. then, she paused for a moment to study gemma. the latina was usually an expert in reading people, even if she'd been off her game as of late for obvious reasons. much to her own chagrin, aileen couldn't ignore the empathy and authenticity practically radiating off of gemma, regardless of her ties to genevieve. "thanks, gem," she replied quietly, locking eyes with the other woman, cringing inwardly at the words that quickly found themselves leaving out of her mouth before she could stop them: "i'm sorry for being a bitch to you. you didn't deserve that." especially not from her.
“Women want to be loved liked roses. They spend hours perfecting their eyebrows and toes and inventing irresistible curls that fall by accident down the back of their necks from otherwise austere hairdos. They want their lover to remember the way they held a glass. They want to haunt.”