oh baby, it’s a wild world

I really thought I was doing well… and then, just like that, I’ve had an intense happiness blossoming inside me. How is that possible? That I forgot?

I forgot how it felt to be this happy.

I’ve been on an absolute high for what feels like weeks - this is with all of life still carrying on. Work, family, relationships… and I’m more steady than a damn rock. Disappointment comes and goes, sickness has no input, the longing is pretty fucking bad… but I’m happy.

Genuinely happy.

I remember I was nicknamed “miss bubbles” in my uni days at my day hostel, and I think I’m pretty close to that again. I can feel my happiness bubbling, I can feel it spilling over into all aspects of my life, and the best part? I can see the impact that my simple smile has on other people, strangers.

I’m determined to live in this moment, this feeling, for as long as possible. There’s no way I’m letting another person steal my happiness from me ever again.

You preach from your self-erected pulpit about brain-rot and anger and how the world is fucked - and you’re right about most of it. What I don’t believe is the self righteous act that somehow always accompanies these sermons of yours.

I don’t believe for a second that you’re loyal.

I don’t believe that you ever really mean what you say.

I don’t believe you’re capable of any selflessness.