— jokes on you

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“no, but i have my own stash of asgardian liquor that does the job.” he shrugged, leaning on the other casually as he sat. “what’s got you all sad? I thought clowns were meant to be happy.”

They’ve generally been avoiding each other, and he’s not really complaining. but when he slips his way into the party and finds the only opens spots next to harley or barbara, he chooses the lesser of the two evils, or at least what he thinks is. he doesn’t even speak as he stands next to her, but watches as her face lights up with disgust at the sight of him. green eyes lift to the mistletoe hanging above them, and he almost laughs. of course this would happen, it’s not like she completely hates his guts. “it’s tradition, harley,” his voice is low, almost as if he’s scared to anger her anymore than he already has. it’s not the time for him the be the boisterous jerk that could get her into bed whenever he wanted. after her fight with ivy, he knew he’d have to be gentle around her. “i’ll even let you add to my collection afterwards,” he waves a hand over his bruised face, courtesy of ivy and jason. he wait for her approval, which is something he never thought he’d do, but didn’t want to cause more of a scene than he already had in the past month. leaning down he quickly and carefully presses his lips to hers for what may be the last time. and even though he longs to drag it out, he steps back and leans against the dorm frame with a smirk. “alright, aim for anywhere that's already bruised. i’ve forgotten what i look like without them,” he knows she won’t obey, but he tries anyways.

“Always.”

“This is a proven fact.”

“You feeling sorry for yourself, J?” He grinned, rolling his eyes at the other. “As long as you don’t eat my stuff I don’t care.”

@notevenafacecard - continued from here!!

“Today is not the day to test my patience, clown.” Ever since her blowout with Harley, she’d been actively avoiding the majority of people in the house, simply searching for a method to return, trying to find how she could get home without having to ask too many favors. Of course, to make matters worse, she’d have to find a means to run into him - the painted asshole who truly believed that he had any sort of influence on her life. 

“You think you have any sort of influence over my hapiness? How cute. Believe me, my disposition has nothing to do with your action, or lack thereof. Now, get out of my way before I decide that you’re no longer worthy of being the scum of this planet.” It wouldn’t be too difficult - her skin had been green for days, one simple swipe of her fingertip and he’d be frothing at the mouth. 

“Or what??” eyebrows raise at the sound of the threat, joker not being one to back away from a good challenge. he takes a step forward, cornering the redhead. signature smirk forms across red painted lips as he stares her down, “i don’t see anyone around to stop me.” he glances around them dramatically before taking a step back, “you’ve had your fun, pamela. but you must have known it’d only be a matter of time before i ruined it.”

Joker: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.

Harley: Oh.

“It don’t matter what frickin’ year it is, weird don’t change. Neither do Terrans, so why we gotta help fix the future? If it ain’t sentinels, it’s gonna be somethin’ else in the future.” Yeah, it was easy to say because it was the ‘right’ thing and it would save a lotta lives. Yadda, yadda. The galaxy was always a mess. 

“roy where’d ya go,” jay half grumbles half slurs as he ambles through the crowd. he’s had too much too drink, jay can feel the buzz in his veins and the lightness in his steps. despite this, he can still recognize the clowns voice as clear as day. it takes him a second to pinpoint where he the voice came from but when he does finally face the clown the grin on his lips falls into a hard line and his eyes harden with hatred. “you’d be right to assume that,” he says with a tilt of his head. “you are welcome to stand in front of the barrel of my gun though,” he grins as he clumsily reaches for his gun but he remembers too late that he’s in his civilian clothing. “guess my fists’ll have to do.” 

Despite his onslaught of insults, Ivy couldn’t keep from letting her lips tug upwards into a smirk. There was something all too wonderful about watching him get angry - even if the words were tainted with sarcasm, she knew what lay just beneath it. She could feel it in his voice, in the way he tried to to get under her skin. It was absolutely delightful. “Oh, Joker… Clearly I give you more credit than you deserve.” Ivy moved slowly down the hall, her skin already starting to turn a faint shade of green - more of a threat than a true plan of attack. No point in attacking him just yet - she didn’t need the entire Batfamily chasing her down before she’d even had a chance to see if it was worth staying.

“Believe me, a cactus would be a much more comfortable throne than whatever whoopie cushion you choose to sit on,” she answered simply, leaning against the wall before she got what she considered to be too close.  “And as for Harley… Say what you like about our partnership, at least we know we can rely on one another. What are you good for? A laugh? A monkey slipping on a banana peel?” She cocked her head to the side, a wicked smirk on her face - better to act nonchalant about his own abuse relationship with Harley for the present moment. “Besides - I have my own reasons for being here. Reasons that I don’t really feel the need to tell you all about.”

Eyes roll for what feels like the thousandth time since the conversation began, the clown unable to hold himself back from acting like a child in a fight. ivy was the only person able to strike a cord in him, an anger that was unparalleled to that of what he held for bruce or harley herself. it was stemmed from the envy that he tried to push down when harley had chosen the redhead over himself and left him completely alone. too arrogant to see through his flaws (personally he didn’t think he had a single one) he’d rather channel out his rage in the pettiest way he possibly could-- by forgetting how to act like an adult in any given situation where ivy was involved.