hunting sunsets

Isaac hated that he knew exactly what Lucas must look in that very moment. He knew that he didn’t like it when he was mad and he wasn’t, not really but Isaac just needed his boyfriend to understand that he didn’t have to tip-toe around him. For the longest time he’d been trying to figure out what it was that made Lucas be the way he is but he felt like it was just in his nature.

Clutching his phone in his hand, Isaac took in another deep breath, trying to compose himself. He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. “I know…,” Isaac said softly. He knew how he could get - he was a leo after all and a St. James on top of that. Like it was in Lucas’s nature to become quiet, it was in his nature to get loud. “I know…I’m sorry, too. I’m just worried,” Isaac said in an attempt to explain himself. “I will, baby…don’t worry, alright? I’m on my way,” he told Lucas, sighing. “I didn’t wanna upset you but you’re really not good at this whole talking thing.” Isaac laughed softly as he kept walking.

If there was one thing that Isaac could change about Lucas, it’d be that he’d want him to speak his mind more often. While he’d gotten pretty good at reading the other man over the years and even better now that they were dating, he still didn’t know what went on his head every now and then. He immediately felt bad though when he heard the silence on the other side of the line that couldn’t be good at all. He didn’t mean to upset Lucas but he just wanted to let him know that he had to look after himself more often than he did.

“Lucas - stop,” Isaac said softly, well aware that he shouldn’t upset his boyfriend more with how much he was struggling already. “First of all, you never bother me and especially not when you fucking hurt yourself!” He told him, shaking his head as he let out a deep breath, clutching his phone in his hand. “Babe - I’ll come pick you up, alright? But hell, you should know by now that you can call me whenever. This was an emergency…you could’ve seriously gotten hurt.” Isaac bit his lip. “You had to get stitches? Jesus Christ, Lucas!” He exclaimed, brushing his fingers through his hair. “Good thing you managed to call a fucking cab before you bled to death,” he mumbled. “I’m glad you’re fine though and that they took care of your hand but promise me something, yeah? You gotta tell me when something like that happens because that’s what we do - we talk. I need you to talk to me and god, I feel sick thinking about how badly this could’ve ended.”

Lucas could feel his eyes getting wide as Isaac’s voice rose, and he bit his lip. He felt stupid being on the verge of tears, but he couldn’t help it. As a child, he had been an easy crier, what his mother called sensitive, and though that tendency had lessened as he got older, Lucas certainly became upset easily even as an adult. Though usually he just became quiet and withdrawn, today, his emotions were on edge. His hand still hurt and the rush of adrenaline had left him feeling raw and wobbly inside.

My movie is going to be in theaters. People are going to see it, and not just avid cinephiles who go to film festivals. Real people, normal people. There’s going to be a trailer and everything.

It definitely helps you appreciate it more when you think that people have the same vision are you and see how hard you’re working. That’s exciting. Remind me about the huge party you’re gonna be throwing then yeah?.

Oh, I don’t know if I’m going to throw a party -- I’m not really a party type of person, I don’t even like parties on my birthday. I might invite people over for dinner though if Isaac is okay with it.

Well I can’t wait to hear! Guilty as charged, son.

They said they’re going to call me either tomorrow or Sunday, so keep your fingers crossed!

“Dude.. I’d actually pay you to do it.”

“Oh, no, you wouldn’t have to do that. I just want to help.”

You know yourself I cry whenever I’m happy, it’s some stupid thing that my dads passed onto me. That’s so cool, it would be so awesome going to see one of my best friend’s movies, and if you’re saying there’s talks in the works I’m sure it’ll happen.

There are a lot of steps in the process, so I don’t want to say anything definitive until I know for sure. I should hear back from them tomorrow or Sunday, though.

While Lucas had managed to injure himself so badly that he’d had to go to the hospital to get stitches, Isaac had no idea at all about what was going on. He’d been working all day as he was in the progress of setting up and hosting an exhibition at the art center all while he tried not to freak out about it. It was a good opportunity for him to get himself out there again and show off his artwork, all while getting more experienced when it came to running exhibitions and setting them up.

He’d just wrapped up a last meeting with some fellow artists when he made his way out of the building so he could make his way home. Out of habit, Isaac was quick to reach for his phone that he carried in his messenger bag so he could shoot Lucas a quick text when suddenly the display brightened and a familiar face and number appeared. Smiling softly, Isaac picked up, though his expression immediately faltered when he heard his boyfriend’s unsteady voice. “Uh – yeah, sure! What do you want me to get?” He asked, trying not to read too much into it. Isaac kept walking and listening before he stopped in his tracks, clutching his phone to his ear. “The hospital!?” Isaac choked out and his eyebrows furrowed. “How did you get there? I mean – you could’ve called me, I would’ve given you a lift,” he said. “Are you alright? I mean – shit, you must’ve cut yourself pretty bad, are you sure you’re good to go home?” Isaac asked, his voice full of concern and words coming out quickly. “I was just on my way home, I’m gonna come pick you up, alright? But jeez, Lucas…is your hand alright so far?”

Lucas felt a spike of anxiety as Isaac’s tone changed. If it was one thing he hated, it was upsetting other people. It was why he tried his best to avoid confrontation, because he didn’t want to hurt anyone else’s feelings or make them angry with him. He nearly always crumbled in the face of such emotion, and especially now, with the added anxieties of being in the hospital, he could feel himself shrinking. His shoulders hunched and he bit his lip as he clutched the phone more tightly with his good hand.

Lucas nibbled on his lip, pulling his phone out of his pocket with his good hand. He had been in the process of making dinner -- cutting up carrots for a stew -- when Bandit had jumped for a bird that had perched on the window sill, knocking Lucas off-balance and making the knife bite into his palm. He cried out in pain, instinctively snatching up a dish towel and wrapping it around his hand to staunch the flow of blood. It felt like his hand was on fire, and he breathed through his mouth to avoid the sickening scent of blood. He took a cab to the hospital, feeling guilty for possibly damaging the driver’s interior, but once he’d been taken care of and given twenty-five stitches in his hand and bandaged him up, the doctor advised that he get someone else to drive him home.

You’re welcome, sweetie. Really? That’s so incredible, Lucas! I’m stoked for  you! As soon as you find out, we’re celebrating.

Yeah, I think it should be final either way by the end of this week. Stoked? You got that word from Dad.

Of course it is because you’re passionate about it and you’re going at it. Great at it in fact. It’s an expression and it gives you an outlet to express yourself as a dancer i can completely get that. It must feel incredible when someone just gets what you’re trying to say. I’ll be sure for you and then you can include me in the celebrations when shit gets crazy.

Yeah, it’s definitely nice when someone appreciates what you do, especially when they actually understand it. Well, thank you! I think I should find out by the end of this week.

I’m about to start crying for you right here and now, I feel like a proud mom. Mom or wife, I can’t decide. I’m so proud of you Lucas, that’s incredible, I can’t wait to see your movie in theaters (if it does happen, which I’m sure it will).

Oh no, don’t cry! But thank you, that means a lot coming from you. It looks like it might happen, although I don’t want to get ahead of myself. But we’ve been talking pretty regularly for the past couple of weeks. 

“Unless you want to take my boring phone calls and answer emails about promoting this movie–Nah, it’s cool, dude.”

“I could take a couple if you needed a break? I talk to people like this all the time. It’s part of my job, too.”