nix

headphones aren’t enough, i need taylor swift to scream lavender haze directly into my ears

Leave me on read, come and go as you please, love bomb me then disappear. Of course when you return I'll be bitter. Just like beer when it goes lukewarm. Just like green tea that's left to cool. The bitterness is not on me. It's on you who did not take me in when I was waiting to be consumed by you. Now, thank your stars all I do is leave a bitter taste and not burn your tongue by turning absolutely caustic.

1989 or midnights this or that wildest dreams or maroon? welcome to new york or paris? lavender haze or new romantics? out of the woods or question…? shake it off or bejeweled? you’re on your own kid or clean? this love or labyrinth? mastermind or you are in love? karma or bad blood? how you get the girl or midnight rain? wonderland or high infidelity? style or anti hero? the great war or i know places? would’ve could’ve should’ve or i wish you would? all you had to do was stay or dear reader

“give me back my girlhood it was mine first” is one of the most devastating lines I have ever heard…..something that is especially difficult for society, and men in particular, to understand, is that relationships or sex can be traumatic and damaging even if it was consensual - something doesn’t need to be a crime to be traumatizing. at the time she’s singing about in the song, Taylor was only 19, and this was a 32 year old man she absolutely idolized  - of course she would fall for his advances. yes, 19 is legal, but Taylor was so young then -she was still living with her parents, she was singing about true love in princess dresses on tour - she was still very much a girl, a naive teenager - so of course she would ignore every warning and jump at the chance to be with this older man who made her feel special. to then be discarded and played and realize you were just another notch in someone’s belt can be devastating on its own, but to go through this when that was the first or one of the first people that you were intimate with… to feel so thoroughly used and preyed upon, and to have that be your introduction to what intimacy is…it feels both heartbreaking and the shame and self-loathing can be so intense, because this person and experience affected you so monumentally while you were just another catch for them. it’s only looking back as you get older that you realize - oh my god, I was just a girl, or a kid, and this person knew that, and took advantage of that to get what they wanted….this song is so important and I’m so proud of Taylor for writing it. 

i hate when people analyze real people and their sexualities the way we analyze fictional characters oh my god

being a taylor swift fan is like living in an escape room. i don’t know what’s going on and i am not contributing anything ever at any time but i am having a good time when i’m not extraordinarily stressed out. and it’s all the time.