I write sometimes

Ilya 'casually' suggests he can stay after sex, he makes them the same tuna melts he did the first time (only now Shane notices the ingredients are already prepared), he asks the same line of questions which Shane understands now is him asking about him seeing any girls ("I see you and rose Landry together a lot" "oh. yeah but she's just a friend" "so you and rose Landry are not...?" "no, no. it's just gossip").

he sees it for what it is. Ilya trying.

Then all three Hollanders would talk around it without actually talking about it for the rest of the weekend.

"Rozanov actually seems pretty nice in person."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Maybe we could invite him to grab dinner with us."

"No."

"You really hate him that much?"

"No, I just - like, we're not friends or whatever."

"Okay, where should we get dinner then?"

"I can't. I have plans tonight."

"Alright then, you boys have fun."

"What?"

“shane?”

his husband had just opened the bathroom door after his shower, steam billowing out into the bedroom.

“yeah?” shane called back. a moment later he’s exiting the en suite, one towel around his waist, the other drying his hair.

ilya is not sure how to start this conversation. “i want to tell you about something,” he tries.

he sees the flicker of a hundred different thoughts in shane’s eyes as he processes his words: confusion, fear, wariness. he immediately wants to placate him, but isn’t sure how to. he’s trying to regulate his own emotions right now, and doesn’t have the energy to also regulate shane’s.

“okay…” shane says. he takes a deep breath and then takes a seat next to a shirtless, just woken up ilya on the bed.

ilya takes a deep breath to steady himself, before placing a hand on shane’s bare thigh. “something has been bothering me.”

okay—maybe not the most solid start. but he’s using his words!

“okay…” shane says again. “you can tell me anything ilya. i love you.”

ilya smiles a little at that and squeezes shane’s knee. “i know, moy lyubimyy.” he looks down to the floor before continuing. “i was wondering if … if you could maybe … not go for runs in the morning?”

shane’s eyebrows furrow, almost comically, with confusion, but ilya misses it, still having his gaze on the floor. “um? yeah? i guess? why?”

ilya hesitates for a moment before deciding to just come out with it. “i don’t like not waking up next to you. ever since you moved in you are always up and on a run when i wake up. and i don’t like it.”

shane is quiet for a moment, which prompts ilya to lift his eyeline back to shane’s. shane’s lips are parted and his eyes are already turning glossy; just a rim of water on his lower lash line.

shane then tackles ilya then to the bed, straddling his legs and wrapping his arms firmly around him. they breathe like that together for a second, before shane says, “yeah, ilya, of course. maybe we can switch to evening runs instead? and go together? we’ll have to work something out on game nights but—”

ilya cuts him off by flipping him over, taking shane’s position on top. shane’s towel is nowhere to be found, so he’s bare, and ilya is still in his sleepwear, which is just boxer briefs. ilya starts planting kisses all over shane’s face. “are you sure? do you mind? i could try and start waking up earlier instead?”

shane squirms from the attention and chuckles. “no ilya, i don’t mind. i don’t want you to wake up earlier; you don’t always sleep well. i’ll just adjust my schedule and go to bed a bit later so we have time for a run after dinner.”

ilya is surprised with how shockingly well this is going. he knows shane loves him, but he also know how much shane loves his routine. but maybe they can find a new routine together, now that they are husband and husband, and playing on the same team.

“thank you,” ilya says before flopping himself down into a full body embrace, still on top of shane.

The entire Boston roster piling behind Marly as he types, trying to decide what to say that could save them because their captain has been possessed by the spirit or a soviet military trainer with knife shoes and if they are forced to make double bagskates again they will either puke or die or both.

And Luca and the other rookies being like, oh you mean the Dad-Trifecta? it's the best thing that has ever happened to us.

You loose your skates or you need help with paperwork or you're just feeling kinda sad and need a dad hug - you go Bood. he will grill you some chicken and go speak to Coach for you. You call him or Cassie if you're sick and they will pick you up and deposit you on the floor with Milo and you are their baby now. I'm 23 years old but that's my dad tho

If you're having trouble with other players, or if you're in like, a crisis? Mama Bear Ilya, will 100% get arrested for any of us and/or pick you up from the middle of nowhere any time of night. You wanna ragebait other players? He has the perception of a God and can tell from one look when a players second wife will leave him. He can also tell when you're feeling like shit mentally and he will pick you up take you to Harris farm and make you dog walk with him while throwing sweets at you. Holmberg got high sticked the other week Ilya spent like, 2 hours going through the guys Instagram with us while wine drunk and ripping his entire life to pieces with us.

And there’s all this miscommunication because Ilya will occasionally mention her name/talks about her and Shane thinks that this is a real woman who is possibly a girlfriend. And he’s talking about a cat but somehow this comes across like he could be talking about a woman. So all this time, Shane thinks that Ilya and (insert name here of cat) are also friends with benefits but possibly more when in fact it’s just Ilya mentioning his cat.

So they get to the cottage and they declare they’re love and make their plan and then Ilya casually drops in “it will be a big move for (kitty) but she’ll be fine, I have a plan.”

and Shane is panicking and freaking out because what?! “I…don’t understand….”

“I will have to drive her when I move, I don’t want to take her on a plane.”

“Uh.”

“I have looked up, you know, taking them on planes and they need to go into the hold. I don’t want to do that.”

Shane is panicking and also really confused because why would a person go in the hold and -

“She will love you, I think. She doesn’t like many people but you will get on well.”

Shane is tearing up because he doesn’t know what the fuck is going on, “She’s coming to Canada?”

“Uh, yes, do you not understand how pets work Hollander? Of course, she is coming too.”

Shane takes a long moment to absorb his words and understand that this woman who he’s thought for years is very special to Ilya is in fact a pet of some sort. And so he’s kinda out of it.

Ilya doesn’t understand why Shane is being so weird, he’s not realised that he never said she was a cat.

“Wait. Are you…allergic to cats?”

Shane can’t help it, “She’s a cat?!” He realises a second too late, he’s never going to hear the end of this ever.

“Yes.” Ilya smirks, “Oh! I see. I forgot I never said who she was. Did you think this was a woman??”

“NO!”

GOD he found her because he was running by the harbor in boston one morning and found a little kitten who got tangled up in a fishing net near the docks, and so ilya stops his run to get her out, and she is obviously puffing herself up like an angry little cotton ball as if her little fluffy butt isn't TRAPPED, and ilya is amused and just, "wow wow, such an angry fish. you are shark, maybe?"

and she is littol and also damp and it's COLD, so he ends up taking her home with him and names her fish because he thinks he's funny, but significantly, he calls her fish in russian, which sounds like "RIH-ba," which to an english speaking ear just sounds like the name Reba with extra emphasis on the first syllable

and reba first comes up in conversation when ilya pauses to text his pet sitter at a hookup with shane, but shane can't see the conversation and just "what? you have something more important to do right now?" and ilya who was a little worried about leaving his kitten all alone is just half-distracted goes, "mm, i am checking up on my ryba. i think she might miss me."

and shane is SO instantly jealous and just, "reba?"

"yes, is her name. she is-ah-" and the word "kitten" escapes him in the moment, so he says, "kotenok, you know this word?"

and shane who DOES know this word but ONLY in the context of when ilya has called him it during sex (and thus thinks it's some dirty talk equivalent of "person i'm fucking," maybe) is now pissed but so flatly goes, "yeah, i know that one"

"she is very cute. you want to see picture?"

and shane is SO simmering mad about it just, "no, thanks." and ILYA thinks he's just mad that sex got disrupted for this, so he playfully tosses his phone away and just, "such a face, hollander. do not worry. i have attention for both of you."

and this is NOT welcome news to shane >:( but fine >:( whatever >:( he doesn't fucking care >:(

and ryba doesn't LOVE meeting people (she is the opposite of papa 😔), so one contributing factor to shane never going to ilya's house in all those years (at least from what he tells himself) is there's no point stressing ryba out for something that's SO casual. it's the reason hookups never go back to ilya's place with him. there is already a lady of the house, and she does not like company. and shane is JUST a hookup, obviously. there's no point in stressing his cat out for something SO casual.

and then on tuna meltdown day, ilya cleaned the house up to look nice so ryba's toys are all collected in her room (because she is the only child of a millionaire--of course she has her own room), and ryba goes to chill out under the guest bed until Strange New Person is gone. but what ilya conveys is, "you might see ryba. i am not sure. she does not like new people." and so shane is now also confused because what?? he's coming over here and someone else might also just show up??

"you're not worried about her telling anyone?"

and ilya just *amused look because he thinks this is a joke about their secrecy* "no, she is very discreet. is not a problem."

and shane would like to keep pushing, but he also doesn't know if ilya is making a joke or not, and he doesn't LOVE the idea of another random person just popping in on this VERY big secret.

"i mean, i'd rather she didn't know at all"

and ilya still thinks they're running a bit here and just, "ah, is sexier, yes? staying secret." *wink* because again! ILYA thinks they're talking about his cat!

and shane is a little reassured, but it does add to the day that like. WHO is this fucking reba person??? and WHY would rozanov even joke about her finding out?? is this a kink?? is this setting up for a threesome? is that why rozanov finally invited him to his house? so fucking reba can hop in bed with them?

WAIT NO OH MY GOD EVEN FUNNIER IDEA FOR SHANE LEARNING ABOUT RYBA:

she doesn't come up during the cottage because ilya is still thinking about the logistics of the move in terms of signing contracts/planning moving his stuff/etc., and obviously ryba is going to be going with him, but he'll just put a mental pin in it to look up the process because some countries have quarantine.

but ryba then. doesn't really come up. they're trying to just enjoy themselves at the cottage and ilya misses his fuzzy girl and doesn't want to dwell on missing his cat because he knows it's a LITTLE sappy and he IS happy to have this time with shane.

but this then means that shane stays over at ilya's house overnight for the first time in the new season and gets woken up to ryba at 2 am with the zoomies (shane got up to get water and didn't know to shut the door after to keep her out), so he wakes up to SOMETHING in the bed running around like a MANIAC and jumping around and even landing on his fucking FACE briefly?? what the FUCK is happening!!! ilya what the FUCK is in your house!!!

and ilya just *groggy but obviously knows this is just his cat* "is just ryba, hollander. don't worry. she will settle. rybochka, calm down. is time for sleeping."

and shane just?? reba set a fucking wild animal loose in your house???? WHAT??

and ilya just *now equally confused* what? does she have mouse or something?

??? you tell ME???? what the fuck kind of woman were you fucking?????

and ilya now *sitting up and turning the light on and gently tossing his cat to the end of the bed when she jumps on him at this sign that it's Time To Play* hollander, what the fuck are you talking about?? you think i am fucking other people???

shane gets up to get some water and ryba is just sitting in the corner of the kitchen like

and finds him hanging out on the floor in the guest room talking to ryba under the bed

Raiders: 👀

Ilya: My Jane said she will send me glasses pic if we win tonight!

Raiders who have experienced this before: Fuck yeah brother 😫🙏

Ilya: So I am not loosing to New fucking Jersey and missing a picture of my pretty Jane in her glasses!

Shane is like no! It’s embarrassing! And this is public! And you wouldn’t make me actually do that to Rose would you? You know the answer, I’m gay!

Only Rose thinks the whole thing is hilarious and gives Shane the go ahead so there’s no real reason to resist Ilya’s begging anymore, still he holds out to the day before the interview.

“Fine! Fine! You can ask about Rose, but I get to ask about anything I want too!” And Ilya’s like yes yes of course my love. His boring Shane would hardly ask anything damning.

Fast forward to the day of the interview Shane is fondly exasperated with Ilya’s Rose questions, and Ilya is being a cocky bastard so happy with how it played out.

Until they switch sides and Shane breaks out his first question:

“Is it or is it not true that despite famously calling Scott Hunter ‘a nearly extinct fossil’ you think he’s hot?” The blood drains from Ilya’s face pretty quickly after that.

“Do you think Hayden Pike is a good hockey player?”

“Do you consider Hayden Pike a close friend?”

“Who do you love more: me or Anya?”

“Besides me who is your favorite teammate?”

Shane wouldn’t admit it, even to Ilya, but he was a bit terrified to meet Marleau.

It wasn’t just that the guy was good at hockey–he’d seen the Boston player move on the ice, and he was definitely nothing to laugh at. It wasn’t that he was super outgoing, or even that Marleau was the one who gave Shane a concussion a few years back. It was that Marleau was one of Ilya’s closest friends–Marleau had been something like family to Ilya during his years in Boston. Even though Shane and Ilya were engaged, something deep inside Shane still wanted Marleau’s approval.

So when he and Ilya approached the older man at the bar in Boston, it was with a lot of trepidation on Shane’s part.

Until Marleau broke into a giant, shit-eating grin. 

Completely ignoring Ilya, walking past his open arms, Marleau strode up to Shane and pulled him into a back-breaking hug. “Jane!” he yelled, catching Shane by complete surprise. “Fuckin’ finally, man! D’you know how long I’ve been waiting to meet the person who can walk Roz like a damn dog?”

Ilya let out a shout of laughter while Shane broke into a grin. “Uh, nice to meet you, Cliff,” he muttered, moving to take the farthest barstool from the other man’s, leaving the middle one for Ilya.

But Marleau shook his head, beaming. “Oh, no. You sit in the middle, my man. I’m getting you so fuckin’ drunk. And shit, I have stories for you. Has Roz ever told you about the time he threw a damn fit because our flight was changed so we wouldn’t have time in Montreal to see you? Or the time he bribed us with cars to beat you? Or once when he nearly cried because a song came on in the bar that reminded him of y–”

“Okay, okay, enough of that!” Ilya cut in, flushing slightly. “You are supposed to be my friend, Marly, do not betray me!”

But Marleu had already signalled to the bartender for a round of drinks. “Sorry, Roz. I’ve been waiting for years. We’re not moving from this spot until Hollander hears everything.”