in search of yellow

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore 

never make a suicide joke again. yes this includes “i wanna die” as a figure of speech. swear off of it. actually make an effort to change how you think about things.

find something to compliment someone for at least 4 times a day. notice the little things about the world that make you happy, and use that to make other people happy.

talk to people. initiate conversation as often as you possibly can. keep your mind busy and you wont have to worry anymore

picture the bad intrusive thoughts in youe head as an edgy 13 year old and tell them to go be emo somewhere else

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

I replaced “I’m stupid” with “I’m a God damn genius.” “Move over newton” “another masterpiece”

I replaced “gross/ disgusting” with “sexy/attractive” “the hight of elegance”

I replaced “I suck/ that sucked/ this is bad” with “fantastic”, “a lovely time”, “ swell/jolly good”

Replace every negative with a positive. Say it so sarcastically. Make it complicated make it entertaining have fun with it.

i learned and got the idea somewhere i think. so here's the thought

Remember, we're all living in a hetero-patriarchal society. The world has always been in favor of men since they started to "rule" the world. Men would always get away from trouble with their "Eh kasi lalaki ako," statements. Men always get praised for doing the bare minimum and all.

now, we can say that it has the same concept as these: when we see a wasp or a bee, our initial reaction would be to be terrified of that wasp because it might and can sting you. hindi natin iisipin agad na "ay, not all wasp sting naman, so hindi dapat ako lumayo." or, when we see a place with mosquitoes, we wont say naman na "ay hindi lahat ng mosquitoes na yan nakakacause ng dengue."