Fuck. I think I love you, say it back.
#6/26/26
I'm spiraling because I'm falling in love with you, (would you like to buy a vowel?) ______ . That makes me want to vomit because I'm terrified of saying the wrong thing. Fuck even writing it down is hard, I hate this. I'm scared for 1000s of reasons, but mostly that you don't have the capacity to love me in the way I require, the way I deserve to be loved. I've been starved of love my whole adult life, I refuse to settle again. I don't want breadcrumbs, I want the whole meal, and sex after dessert.
I don't know what healthy love even looks like. I've never had it. I've never shared a partner or had an open relationship. You're the only person I'm talking to who makes me feel this way. What if I can't handle this with you. What if I lose you? This is all too fast, I feel insane. Is it all in my head? How did I fall in love with someone who already has a nesting partner? Someone whose life will probably always come before mine. That is such an unfair thought I know. I am a girls girl, aren't I?
I shouldn't assume to know the dynamic of a relationship I know nothing about, but you were so vague on your boundaries. I kind of hate that too. Not because you owed me more, but because I was too afraid to ask what I actually wanted to know. Can we date? What does that look like for us? What can it possibly even be? Do you actually have time for me? I don't want to be a burden. I don't want you to leave. I want to lay in your arms, for however long our forever lasts.
Fuck.
I think I love you.
Say it back.
