me: Do not stick your fingers into a meat grinder. The machine cannot tell the difference between human flesh and dead meat, and will grind both of them into ground meat all the same. It is in your best interest to never stick your fingers inside an operating meat grinder.
reply 1: Actually meat grinders are an evil capitalist plot, they were invented as a way to make meat workers more efficient than they would be if they were grinding the meat by beating two rocks together. Back then it was perfectly safe to put your fingers between the meat-banging rocks when you were working, so therefore it is evil to expect me to not do that with meat grinders. It's entirely the fault of capitalism that I had to learn how to type this fast with my toes.
reply 2: But that's not true?? You can't make ground meat from fingers. Meat they put into ground meat is different from human hands, fingers have bones in them, it would break the machine.
reply 3: Wait is this true?? is this a joke?? I don't get it, I put my fingers in guys from grindr all the time and I still have all my fingers??