So the post about Dean fantasizing about locking Sam up in dungeon rgave me this particular idea... For reasons that would need a whole essay of its own (it is sitting on my drafts btw) i think Dean, while being obsessed and insane, is oftentimes a lot lot less sexual about Sam. At least for long time before they do it. So all these really possessive behaviors are still contained in very familial protective boxes .
Meanwhile i see Sam as opposite. As someone canonically less sexual, i think Sam is the one developing Dean boner from early days. But here's the thing. Depending on what au and what stage i love playing with the idea that Sam's own boner is mixed with some confusion and resentment and therefore need for distance and rebellion.
So after these little messes with Gadreel, or maybe Amelia and everything, Sam would wonder about how Dean would lock him next time. Maybe as some sort of a bitter joke in his head, maybe with bit of resentment, maybe says it just to hurt Dean a little, but then it becomes his own obsessive thought, it becomes his own dirty little secret he gets off of. He keeps wondering about the lengths Dean would go to keep him for himself. Would he put him in one of those lab tanks?? Would he chain him? Break his bones just to tend him later?? Cut off his limbs so he wouldn't run away? All the while stroking himself and moaning. (Also i just think how funny this would get. Dean's just gonna be so oblivious while Sam starts to get awkward and squirmy around him. Hell maybe it all gets worse post Gadreel so Sam has great excuse not to even look at him. Dean thinks it's"s just cuz be is mad at him and he is right about but Sam is also mad at himself for getting a boner over Dean's actions.
This is why Sam's insides all reek of shame and all the self hate and repression. This is why he needs to get away and he needs to pretend some ordinary level headed girl would make him happy.
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