my daydream may be fake, but babe, you are too

it would be so awesome

right before this clip, Hirose shows Nakamura the game they’re talking about. He’s trying to include Nakamura, to not ice him out or make him feel excluded. He invited him to study and then to lunch! He clearly wants Nakamura here and enjoys his company. But Nakamura doesn’t know about the things they’re talking about and so can’t contribute.

We’re in Nakamura’s head for 99% of the anime. We know that in this scene, he’s writing down notes about what Hirose likes (music, shows, video games) so he can check them out later. But Hirose doesn’t know that, and they just came from studying at the library. So to Hirose, it seems like Nakamura doesn’t actually want to be there; that he’s just being polite and is trying to continue studying with his notebook. And that’s why Hirose looks so sad and guilty in a shot that we the audience are privy to, but Nakamura doesn’t notice.

And we see how Hirose deals with that guilt and sadness—by not giving up! By paying attention! He thinks Nakamura is sitting in polite discomfort, trying to sneak in some studying, and he tries to make Nakamura more comfortable. He asks him about what music he likes, he notices when his drink is empty and offers to get him more. He even gets sulky when his other friends usurp his gallant offer by asking him to get more for them, too, because that offer was to Nakamura, thank you!

Then, when Nakamura helps him get the drinks, Hirose takes that opportunity to apologize for his perceived offense of “making” Nakamura tag along.

And we get a nice subtle parallel here to when Hirose almost did the exact thing he’s worried Nakamura is doing now—politely tagging along when Takeuchi tells him to join so as not to rock the boat or be a “spoilsport,” as Takeuchi calls him. Forcing himself to go. And now Hirose is concerned that he acted like Takeuchi and pressured Nakamura.

This is such interesting insight into Hirose, and really helps further establish—outside of Nakamura’s biased POV—that he’s a genuinely kind and considerate person (even if he does have a bit of a mischievous streak with that prank he pulled on Takeuchi) and that he’s genuinely interested in putting in effort in being friends (and maybe more) with Nakamura.

I really hope we get more insights like this outside of Nakamura’s POV because Nakamura, our precious adorable unreliable narrator, is wrapped up in his own anxieties and stuck in his own head, and assumes Hirose is perceiving him through the same Doom Gloom Awkward Weirdo lens he sees himself and his actions through. But Hirose doesn’t know his thoughts, his plans, his hopes, and Hirose has his own internal world that Nakamura can’t see into, either.

Episode 12 completely wrecked me 💔

i feel like ive been shot 67 times while watching my gay son suffer like that i will not get better until next wednesday….

so i decided to focus on the ✨epic✨ part