..& so the cookie crumbles

Life sucks today. 

I haven't posted anything here in some time and not ever anything very personal. But I just feel like I need to rant and get stuff out of my brain so I could maybe get some sleep. So here goes.. My parents got a divorce, like, 7 years ago now. And at first all seemed like it was gonna be fine and civil and just dandy. Until it wasn't. About 6 months aftet the divorce my dad started acting weird - sent my sister awful letters, didn't want to see us anymore, said hurtful things. And then he just disappeared. For 7 years. No word or call or message or anything for 7 fucking years. And now he called me. Today. Fuck, I need a drink.. He called and said he'd like to meet up and talk and see his grandchildren (whom he hasn't seen even once so far as they're 3years and 8months, respectivelly).... And all I managed to say was 'Sure. Fine. We can talk.' So now he's coming over tomorrow. Tomorrow! Fuck. ...I have no clue what to say to him. Honestly. I don't even know what I'd like to say to him. Or what I'd want to happen. Just...no clue. What do you say to someone who just deserted you at one point, seemingly with great ease and no second thought? What do you ask them? How do you talk to them? ... Just.. wtf? I definitely need a drink. Fuck.