Beth nodded, conceding the point. âNo, itâs definitely not love, but we all say that it is.â It honestly baffles her, how the word love is so regularly used to describe things that do not represent love in the slightest. Itâs just expectations and conformity wrapped up in pretty bows. A part of her wanted to curl away in disgust, or vehemently reject the personality she was known for in Fairview. But she couldnât. It was so intrinsically tied to her, tied to her identity and tied to her understanding of family that she couldnât help but wonder if it was even possible to strip all of it from her person. Besides, she could admit to herself that there were aspects of her personality that felt real⌠And yet, what was even more difficult was reconciling the young lady she is in Fairview with the young woman she was at universityâ her core values never wavered, and yet the way she presented herself changedâ she wondered what her uncle thought, having been privy to both âsidesâ of her, so to speak. Perhaps one day she would ask, when she wasnât such a coward.
A small scoff escaped her as her uncle continued to speak. âIâm fairly certain that in Fairview, most people are more likely to remember my surname before my actual name.â Though, in their defense, Elizabeth wasnât necessarily a stand-out name. There had been quite a few Elizabeths in high school during the same time, but surprisingly sheâd been the only Elizabeth in her grade. Small miracles. âHellâ Iâm pretty sure most people know exactly where I live.â Small towns truly are a different world, especially in the suburbs. God knows that she canât fathom having so many people knowing exactly where her dorm is. In cities, thereâs a sense of privacy that small towns do not affordâ and so people devise their own ways to create privacy. The Ashworthâs way was to present themselves as picture-perfect households that look as if theyâd been pulled out of the pages of a misogynistic magazine from the 50sâ but it works. It works amazingly.
Beth laughed, the sound loud and open as her uncle presented the idea of beating her at chess as a life reward for being her uncle. âMaybe we can take this up in the ring,â she replied, her fists coming up as she fell into a boxing stance, before she laughed once more and continued walking. It had been too long since sheâd properly worked out, and she couldnât help but miss the physical exertionâ and God, it would be so freeing. âCareful now, if you actively scowl you might just end up attracting more attention. Housewives get bored, you know? A new face with a perma-scowl might be the exact kind of excitement they think they want in their lives.â It was a stereotype, but one that seemed to actually be true.
If your entire environment was teaching you wrong, who else could you blame but the environment? At what point did you just say fuck it and deconstruct everything you had learned. Then how much could you also blame your environment before having to reconcile that you were also at fault? âWell thatâs fucked.â He shrugged simply. It was. Although if he were honest, he was in no place to talk about love but he was also aware enough to see a terrible situation when presented. As an outsider, with no desire to look in, Pandoraâs box with all her evil seemed just as appealing.Â
He wasnât sure the feature of her being mainly identified by her surname was just attributed to her or the rest of the Ashworths either. In a town that seemed like it would gladly fit into the Twilight Zone. Regardless, names meant more than just an identifier here, it was almost like they were an identity in itself. The currency of Fairview was the weight of their names, whether they knew it or not. He figured that was just small town mentality though. Where judgement was about as common as a freshly cut lawn. âIâm sure everyone knows where everyone else lives here.â How else did you casually talk about the person down the street without having to make sure you werenât saying their names. If subtlety was even the goal here. âAnd yet, I suppose thereâs some appeal if itâs still keeping so many people here.â He had yet to find it. He was slightly convinced they were just brainwashed. Everyone in town couldnât be that stupid, right? The Bermuda triangle theory still stood strong.
Nathan nudged his niece at her suggestion of taking it to the ring. If there was a decent gym, why not? âDonât suggest a fight you canât handle,â he teased. Heâd never truly go hard on her, even just sparring sounded good. For both of them. Beth could use a decent, health release, and he just enjoyed occasionally hitting things. Amongst other reasons. And if anyone had a problem, he could easily take the blame, or toss them a pair of gloves and duke it out. A quiet snort left his mouth. That had felt like a jab, a true one, but a jab nonetheless. âIâd be surprised if they arenât already actively out crawling looking for a target.â Or maybe they were and he had just been blessed for the moment. How exactly was he supposed to keep that blessing going? The last thing he wanted was to be catnip for bored housewives. âIsnât brunch and bottomless mimosas supposed to be their excitement? If thatâs all they do for fun no wonder theyâre bored.â