I will love you until my dying day.

1. It makes no fucking sense to sketch out a bouquet before you make it.  Every individual flower is different in a way that cannot really be adjusted the way other building materials can be adjusted, and each individual bouquet is unique.  Just put the fucking flowers together.

2. No one — in months and months of working at the flower shop — has ever cared what the flower/color of the flower means.  No one’s ever asked.  It’s just not something people tend to care about outside of fiction and it’s certainly not something most florists know.  You know what florists know?  What looks good and is thematically appropriate.

Here’s an actual list of the symbology of flowers, as professionals use it:

Yellow – for friends, hospitals Pink – girls, girlfriends, babies, bridesmaids Red – love Purple – queens White – marriage and death (DO NOT SEND TO HOSPITALS) Pink and purple – ur mum Red, orange, and yellow – ur mum if she’s stylish Red, yellow, blue – dudes and small children Blue and white – rare, probably a wedding Red and white – love for fancy bitches

Here are what the flowers actually mean to a florist:

The Fill It Out flowers:

Carnations – fuck u these are meaningless filler-flowers, not even your administrative assistant likes them, show some creativity Alstroemeria – by and large very similar to carnations but I like them better Tea roses – cute and lil and come several to a stalk, a classy filler flower Moluccella laevis – filler flower but CHOICE Delphinium – not as interesting as moluccella but purple so okay I guess Blue thistle – FUCK YEAH, some fucking textural variety at last!  you’re getting this for a dude, aren’t you? Chrysanthemums – barely better than carnations but better is still better Gladiolus – ooh, risky business, someone understands the use of the Y-axis, very good

Focal points:

Long-stem roses – yeah whatever Lilies – LBD, looks good with everything, get used as often as possible Hydrangeas – thirsty fuckers, divas of the flower world and rightly so, treat them right and they make you look good Gerbera daisies – the rose’s hippie cousin, hotter but no one admits it Peonies – CHA-CHING, everybody’s absolute favorite but you need guap Orchids – if this isn’t for a wedding you’re probably trying too hard but they’re expensive so keep ordering them

You know what matters?  THE CUSTOMER’S BUDGET.  THAT’S TELLING.

-$20 – if you’re not under 12, fuck off, get your sugar something else $30 – good for bouquets but an arrangement will be lame $40 – getting there, there’s something that can be done with that.  you can get some gerbs or roses with that and not have them look stupidly solo. $50 to $70 – tolerable $80 – FINALLY.  It sounds elitist but this really is the basic amount of money you should expect to spend on an arrangement that matters.  That’s your Mother’s Day arrangement.  You’re probably not going to spend $80 on a bouquet. $90 to $130 – THE GOOD SHIT, you’re likely to get some orchids $130+  – Weddings and death.  This amount of money gets you a memorial arrangement or a handmade bridal bouquet.  Don’t spend this on a Mother’s Day or a Babe I Love You arrangement, buy whosits a massage or something.

Miscellaneous:

Everything needs greening and if you don’t think that you’re an idiot. 

As a new employee, when you start making arrangements, you can’t see the mistakes you’re making because you’re brand new and you’re learning an art form from the ground up.

With a few exceptions customers don’t have a clear plan in mind.  They want you to develop the bouquet for them.  They want something that will delight their little sweetbread but you’re lucky if they know that person’s favorite color, let alone flower.

Flower shops don’t typically have every kind of flower in every kind of color.  Customers generally aren’t assed about that.  Most people don’t care about the precise shade of the rose or having daffodils in July, because they’re not boning up on flower language before they buy.  That would imply that they’ve got a clear bouquet in mind and, again, they don’t.

Being a florist is essentially a lot like what I imagine being a mortician is about.  You’re basically keeping dead things looking good for as long as possible.  You keep the product in the fridge so it doesn’t rot and look horrible by the time the family gets a whack at it, and in the meanwhile you put it in a nice container.

All the Other Ghosts characters: Blaine Anderson/Phalanx

All the Other Ghosts characters: Kurt Hummel/The Ghost

5 days late but shh!

Any Advent I do will be in one little au verse, and in order to challenge myself even more I gave the boys superpowers. So! Here we go!

The air has the bite of a winter chill, nipping cold at Kurt’s cheeks and nose but the whole city is laid out beneath him, glittering and sparkling like stars. Except this is New York, and New York isn’t like staring up at the stars in Ohio where it’s peaceful and calming. New York is teeming with life, with people good and bad, kind hearts and poor choices all tossed up together.

But here, up on a rooftop, nothing can sour the view. It’s a hotel beneath him, he thinks, a pavilion balcony on a lower level is crowded with people out for Saturday night, a high rise bar with a perfect view of the Empire State and the street below. Voices and chatter and laughter almost drown out the music but its December now and Christmas songs are playing at full volume. Kurt’s humming along to them from his bird’s eye perch, a few stories above on the rooftop proper, with the air conditioning vents and the power generators.

@Backstage Just do it. @DarrenCriss #WednesdayWisdom

@araliyaintheskywithdiamonds, @chrisdarebashfulsmiles @nijincolfer-criss

@ajw720

First of all, let’s just put out there that if you are getting that many people telling you that your behavior is problematic, you should take some time to really look int he mirror …. especially when the only people telling you that you are right are the same handful of CCers as invested in Cc and who lack respect for boundaries as you. It’s just sound life advice.   

I am blogging to show those among us who are being manipulated by CC theories that CrissColfer is based on outright lies, skewing the truth, a deep  JEALOUSLY and hatred of Mia Swier-a woman none of you know-, and fetishizing romance in a way that doesn’t ring true to real human behavior- CC is a “Disney Princess” kind of love that negates the reality of the struggles of real relationships.  I am not blogging to change YOUR minds but rather to show YOU that your behavior damages Darren and Chris. Both have gotten more and more private as CCers post hate on their social media.  It also deprives the rest of us who just support them for who they actually are and not some fantasy we want them to be- a combination of Blaine and Kurt that never existed except in your minds and on the pages of CC fanfic. 

CCers write off EVERYTHING Darren says and does as being forced on him by a contract. There is literally NOTHING he does that you approve of.  I am fascinated about WHY you like him because according to you all, every word out of his mouth is a lie and every thing he does is a stunt.  What about Darren do you like? Real Darren not Blaine Darren. 

Darren has gone pretty silent on his social media except for promo and ads and  Chris has all but stopped posting because their social media has become a shit show of CCers posting the HBIC CC theory and attacking fans who disagree and friends who post anything nice about MIa. It’s super gross. 

You could have written your diatribe directly to me instead of a public post… but then you can’t publicly bully me and bully is what you all do best. You answer anons that suck up to you, those who repeat your theories verbatim, and you attack and name call anyone who points out the facts. I have written “asks” using my username to many of you and I have either been ignored, blocked or attacked publicly.  I don’t bully.  I point out why your latest statement of fact is either a lie or a stretch of the truth. But you can’t stand that.  I copied the answers I saw posted a few days ago by various CCers- this is one day’s worth of responses to anons none who deserved these responses: 

Anon just stop demonstrating to us how stupid you are C'mon. Start to love yourself a little more.

I’m almost speechless. This anon is rude, stupid and a bunch of other things I don’t wanna even list.

Anon, seriously you need help. It’s not healthy what you do. And to be honest D and C are not part of my masturbatory fantasy…..These anons are stupid.

Anon, seriously you need help. It’s not healthy what you do. And to be honest D and C are not part of my masturbatory fantasy.

It’s funny how pissed off the “masturbatory fantasy”  made you all because there is a CC trope that Darren was forced to be contractually  straight when he first started on Glee because marketing him as the straight hunk “made his straight fan’s panties wet”.  

I can say without a doubt that NOBODY who reads CC theory is “worried” or “scared” that you all are right. Mostly because we don’t care who Darren sleeps with. There are no “winners take all” fans someone posted today. Also because nothing CCers believe is proven by facts. Most of you rant and rave about the “Stans” not seeing what is right there and I promise you we see everything you see.  We simply understand that using photographs- a year moment in time- to write someone’s life story is juvenile, petty, ridiculous and never going to approximate the truth. Piecing together Darren’s “truth’ through social media posts will always leave yourself open to looking like a fool. 

I get that you all are so caught up in being right and being a family that you cannot back down. As Darren says he is straight and in love with Mia, as Chris and Will continue to be a couple, as you never get CC sightings, you will continue to simply make up another contract to blame it on, double down on how Darren and Chris are working hard to end this and ask “can this be over”.   It will happen when Darren brings Mia to the Emmy’s and it will happen when he marries her. 

It’s ironic and tone deaf that you tell me to do yoga, water plants or take a deep breath because I am not the one who rants about how angry I am, how I am screaming, how pissed I am every day when  Darren does ….well everything he does.  I just can’t stand that you lie. Period. 

You don’t own tags. Sorry. I will continue to tag them as I want to tag them. I want people on the fence to read my posts. I want people who are as frustrated as I am about CCers bullying Darren, Mia, Chris and Will to feel like someone is speaking for them. Butthurt? nope…that is all you all.  And I haven’t blocked anyone.   

Name ONE celebrity who said a contract forced them to stay in the closet in the last 10 years? They have talked about agents and managers telling them they have to stay in the closest to stay relevant but nobody has said they have a contract. Morals clauses would have to be held up in court and today being gay isn’t immortal in the court’s eyes. Besides, who-besides CCers’ fantasy Darren would be dumb enough to sign a never ending contract with Fox and then keep signing new contracts with Ricky Rollins?  

What do you actually LIKE about Darren?  The Darren that we see every single day, because I very rarely see a post that supports Darren.  You like his performance in ACS…. that’s it. According to you, Darren is a zombie cuck without a backbone who signed hundreds of contracts and befriended people who were willing to sell Darren’s soul for their own fame and MIa’s fame.  You hate his interviews, you hate his friends, you hate his Bar, you hate his tour mate, you hate his decision to work with Ryan Murphy, you hate his TV interviews, you hate you hate you hate.