Lord Jesus, have mercy of me, I am a sinner.

'But the people living there are powerful, and their cities are fortified and very large; and what's more, we saw giants there! 

Numbers 13:28

Giant like situations will always be part of life. There will always be giants that we have to deal with. However, the giants must not intimidate us! If our eyes are focused on them, fear will creep in and we will forget the promises of God. Instead focus on Jesus who is able to deal with your giants. Be still and know that He is God. We have a big God for whom nothing is too difficult.

Love is the kingdom which the Lord mystically promised to the disciples, when He said that they would eat in His Kingdom: 'You shall eat and drink at my table in my kingdom' (Luke 22:30). What should they eat and drink, if not love? When we have reached love, we have reached God and our journey is complete. We have crossed over to the island which lies beyond the world, where are the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit: to whom be glory and dominion. May God make us worthy to fear and love Him. Amen.

I praise the Godhead, unity in three persons, For the Father is light, The Son is light, And the Spirit is light. But the light remains undivided, Shining forth in oneness of nature, Yet in the three rays of the persons.

Pelearon todos, desde el duque de Alba, grande de España a Pizarro, guardador de puercos. Pelearon hidalgos y labriegos, pastores y burgueses, bachilleres y magnates, clérigos y pícaros, escribanos y caballeros. Pelearon los hijos de todas las regiones de España. Pelearon Garcilaso, Ercilla, Cetina, Alcázar, Cervantes, Lope de Vega, Calderón, peleó un pueblo entero sin distinción de clases, patrias, quehaceres, profesiones o riquezas.

These (and others too) are all copying mechanisms we developed to fill the void/emotional neglect/absence of unconditional love we've been experiencing in our past. Living this way though can make us develop other problems in our self: eg. digestive problems, chronic stress, dissociation. But the thing is: no matter what we do or how much we change, an emotionally immature caregiver is blocked by their own self limitations and fixed views so they won't show up for us as we need.

And it's not our fault: they just weren't given the correct infos to handle their emotions and cannot see where they're going wrong (maybe also cause they were taught from another wounded generation that this is how you do things, no matter if they pain you or what), so please forgive yourself and free yourself from shame and guilt. It's not your fault if your caregivers couldn't show you that you don't have to gain love in any way cause you're already lovely and worthy as you are.

The moment you miss your parents' love in your childhood (a foundational moment of the life of any human being), you carry this void in your adulthood and it may even get enhanced, or make you search for the same type of relationship where you need to show up in a certain way to feel like you deserve love (and this keeps you stauck in the same place of pain and self hurt). You will always need to seek approval, to act in a certain way, fear being abandoned, wonder about your worth/being enough, and that's cause of your rooted habit born from the lack of emotional consistent support.

To get out of this cycle, try to understand why and how you had to develop this copying mechanism and why you keep it in your life these days (ofc ask for help to professional figures too if you need). You can get out of it and find the right emotional nourishment you need and deserve: let yourself try to see things from another perspective.