natalie

i have a feeling you will never see this because you have moved on, rightfully so, but i need to say this. i haven’t felt this guilty and disgusted with myself for a very long time. i wanted to say that what i did was terrible. you we’re already hurting because of me, and i did the one thing that i knew would hurt you with the intentions of hoping it would hurt. i had reasons why i did what i did but there’s no excuse for it. i was being immature and impulsive and didn’t think about what i was really doing. and i’ve realized all the times i’ve done that to you and you still took me back. you shouldn’t of jacob, you deserve better. yes you’ve hurt me before but i’ve hurt you countless times too. and i realize it really is the end of us now and i accept that. i did that to myself. it was my choice and i have to live with the consequences. i have no idea how i could be so ruthless to the one person i’ve ever truly loved, the only reason i can come up with is because i’m just a bad person don’t know how to love anyone right. i ruined the one good thing i had going for me and jacob i will never be able to express how sorry i am for that. i hope the best for you.