Archive

At this rate I’m likely going to die soon.

I think I've finally realized why I can't stand this disgusting website anymore. A huge majority of people on here all remind me of my abusers that bullied and stalked me for nearly a year and also pushed me close to suicide. So many people on here just.. Act so similar. The same typing style, the same passive aggressiveness, the sheer lack of regard for others, the unapologetic way they defend their cruelty, it's all too similar. Even the people I like and want to respect on here end up bearing disturbing similarities to how my abusers acted towards me. The passive hostility towards people who sometimes don't even deserve it, or just how they interact and are in general. It all resembles these people and it's why I can't scroll through my dash without getting uncomfortable. And the people who aren't like that? Reblog from others who are. It's always there. This way of acting is literally ingrained and i can't feel safe or play at all like this. I can't control how people speak. I'd love it if no one would give others lists of ways to kill themselves. I wish people could stop with unnecessary hostility towards someone who wants to blacklist a show. I can't control it though. But getting angry and crying after going through 22 pages of someone being told to kill themselves and being linked to various suicide methods and exposed to gore, that won't change anything. So I need to leave I actually have so, so, so much more I want to let out, but I know how everyone will react. I really do. I fear even posting this will get me hate. I'm not changing my stance though. I'll never accept pointless hostility and I'd rather be accused of being an apologist of some sort than say that telling someone to die is okay. This website is brimming to the core with absolute toxic hostility and a large group of people who gladly will express this to anyone they feel deserves it. It all reminds me of the kids who told me to be skinned alive and stalked me for months on end. I can say with confidence, with experience from that harassment and with 3 years on this site, that so many of you are on that level. Some even worse. Sorry.