The offered scarf seems to have been of some support to Hanako; Rui can’t stop himself from glancing over from the corners of his eyes, and is caught more than a little bit off-guard by the wave of relief that rushes through him just from how comfortable Hanako seems to be with it. He’s still crying, but at least he has the scarf now, and it’s helping, isn’t it? It’s – helping. Rui’s helped.
Maybe he doesn’t need to apologize, but – “I want to.”
Because even if Hanako doesn’t know, Rui understands. The realization that there was something so similar between the two of them (especially when they’d first met the way they had; Rui would never have even suspected any similarities other than their age), something that no two people should ever have in common, never mind two kids – that’s what had him wanting to apologizing, too. Not just for making Hanako cry, but for – knowing how it feels.
He was… sorry that that weight was hanging over Hanako’s head, too. No one deserved that. No one but him.
“… a question? What is it?” That isn’t what he’d been expecting to hear, but having Hanako able to shift away from the topic is a good sign. And then – then –
Rui’s breath catches in his throat.
Rui wants to say something, make some kind of snide remark (some kind of joke?) about how that’s exactly what Hanako said they weren’t going to be. He’d called Rui sentimental for it. Rui wants to say something about the friendship bracelets, some dry comment about how quickly Hanako had gone back on his word – but instead he just stays silent, at least for a time. The word repeats in his head over and over: friend.
So many people have called him that, here. More than he deserves. More than he ever deserved. How many of them knew the real Rui? How many knew just how awful he was – is – and still insisted on that term? He could count them on less than one hand. Tsuru and Mitsuri, insisting he was trying to change, was changing, is changing… what good did that do him if he’d never be able to stop being a demon? What good did –
Rui blinks back some tears of his own.
He wants to say that he’d like that, because he would. He wants to be allowed to be the kid he never had a chance to be. But –
“I don’t know if I fully understand how it feels, being a friend. Having a friend.” The words are soft and vulnerable, but Rui forces himself to turn back to Hanako. It doesn’t matter if he’s scared of this, of all of this. Hanako looks so small. He looks as vulnerable as Rui feels. He couldn’t say no, even if he’d wanted to. “But… friends trust one another, don’t they? They like each other. Hanako…” Rui could be told every awful thing Hanako had done and he doubted he’d change his mind. It isn’t his place to forgive him, but he would. But… “… I’ve been a terrible person.”
“Before I was brought to this island… ‘Rui’ was someone awful. If I tell you all of it someday… if I let you know how terrible I’ve been, Hanako, will you still trust me? Would you still want to be my friend?”
Rui surprises himself when he laughs out of nowhere again. It’s small as ever, but it’s still a laugh. This whole thing is so silly. Caring so much. Not knowing how to make friends. The thought that, at the end of the day, they were just two lost boys out of their element. Made to grow up too soon.
“And… are you going to make me wear a matching bracelet?”
–yes, he would be his friend, if Hanako still wants it.
They were just acquaintances, two kids standing next to each other confessing part of each other’s truth.
Trusting one another seemed like a difficult task that Hanako didn’t take into consideration when making the previous offer, he had never been good at it, always wary around his surroundings and it was way too easily for him to betray someone to get away with things. Ah-- Maybe he had said too much...What does it mean to have a real friend anyway? An emotional kid surely can say a lot in a moment of vulnerability.
Hanako is not a good person.
Terrible. Rui said, with no explanation about it, and it wasn’t needed. Hanako had been an awful person during his living days, committed an unforgivable sin that he so much wanted to keep hidden under his ashes, but that couldn’t be anymore.
As obnoxious as he could be ( almost every second ) he wouldn’t force Rui to talk about it, he perfectly understands the “comfort” that brings not talking about things as if they never happened, the feeling of not wanting to share unpleasant memories with others and the desire of leaving everything behind and move on with this “new life” game. So he just listens, the tears disappearing from his face and getting sealed on Rui’s scarf.
He can befriend a murderer. The déjà vu of the joke inevitably crosses his mind.
❝ Hey, hey, just because you heard something ugly about me doesn’t mean you have to say something about you, you know?!❞ He says, trying to stop Rui before he says something he could regret later, it seemed like the dense mood they had created could make anyone spill their deepest secrets.
❝ Don’t try to make me feel better with the “we all have our things”! Actually...I don’t want to hear anymore.❞ Childishly, the ghost covers his ears with his hands and starts making loud noises pretending not to hear his companion. ❝ Lalalalalalalalala----❞
A word stands behind his yelling, big amber eyes widened at the sound of it...bracelet.
Inside his pocket a pair of bracelets were safe inside, Hanako proceeded to pull them out to show them to Rui, red bands meant for their wrists, the work seemed done by someone with no experience in handicrafts. Different shiny charms were hanging from each one, a moon for Hanako, and a star for Rui. He hands the gift to the other boy.
