Lit Loser

gomez addams is the dream friend. id kill to have that dude in my corner. like if he found out my company closed cuz of covid he’d just give me 5k a month until “you get back on your feet, old boy”. I’d have to sword fight him like twice a week but then I’d just get better at sword fighting. literally what is the downside

I would trust them with my life.

melon boy looks so sad! why are you sad, little melon boy?

my sense of humor: getting birthday cards with the wildly incorrect age on it for people

Straight people are so weird. They’re like “cooking is a woman’s job” unless you’re grilling then it’s a mans job. And cleaning is a woman’s job but the mans gotta take out the trash can’t let the ladies touch that icky garbage. And fucking gardening is for women, except mowing the lawn, that’s for men. Who the fuck came up with this shit??

Women doing the daily jobs and men doing the once in a while jobs seems to be the trend

14th century doctors be like “i don’t know what’s wrong with you but you’re a woman so i diagnose you with witchcraft”

19th century doctors be like “i don’t know what’s wrong with you but you’re a woman so i diagnose you with hysteria”

21st century doctors be like “i don’t know what’s wrong with you but you’re a woman so i don’t believe anything is wrong with you and won’t diagnose you”

I always see the first three panels and think “is this supposed to sound ridiculous? Bc I would love this”, completely forgetting about the last panel, which i then scroll down to and proceed to lose my shit

me in my head at the supermarket: nobody is ever going to fucking love me. omg 25% off